#femslash

reaching for the moon (2013)

-you know, if you asked me to marry you again, I wouldn’t say no

-but would you say yes

-yes

sorry

draw the woman you love

aesthetics of the “snapshots”

#passion

early morning practice
when the boys are out sleeping, the girls are out to play. (katara/suki)
also found on ao3

…

Katara is always up first — at least between Aang and Sokka — so while gathering tinder for the morning fire, she’s surprised to find another soul awake at the crack of dawn.

Must be Suki, she thinks, hearing soft grunts and a flurry of dirt. Katara heads in the direction of the noise, stepping through the bramble and ducking under a few tree branches, finally coming to a clearing in the woods. And as expected, she spots Suki just ahead, practicing stances and fighting sequences.

Katara can’t help but stare, watching Suki drive through the motions of her drill.

In fact, she never really could help but stare ever since meeting Suki and the other Kyoshi Warriors. Not only has it been a long time Katara has seen other women her age, but Katara has also never seen such a formidable martial force made up of solely women. Then again, the further Katara travels, the more she realizes home at the South Pole is much more traditional than she ever thought.

Suki moves elegantly, naturally, confidently — like a dance to a song. One that Katara can’t hear but that she can see when she follows Suki’s rhythm. Suki’s experience is evident in her practice; her chi blossoms into her attacks, withdraws into her defensive stances. She surges forward with a snap of her fans, swings back with a long sweep of her legs.

It’s mesmerizing.

Suki must notice Katara, because she closes her sequences with a quick bow, then lifting her head to flash a grin in Katara’s direction. Caught, Katara awkwardly walks forward, pretending she just happened to be passing by and definitely wasn’t just staring this entire time.

Suki doesn’t seem to care one way or the other, stepping toward Katara and waving hello. Now that Suki is closer, Katara sees the glint of a fresh coat of sweat over her forehead and the light blush over her cheeks from her recent exercise.

“You’re up early,” Suki remarks, wiping her forehead with a rag and throwing it over her shoulder.

Quietly, Katara notes how different Suki looks without the standard Warrior make-up. Suki still, of course, has her bright blue eyes and a big warm smile, but her face seems so much softer in absence of the sharp red eye shadow and pale white foundation.

“I’m usually up before everyone else,” Katara replies, before adding, “Well, at least I’m up before the boys.”

Suki laughs. “I’m always up early too. The morning is the best time to get anything done. On Kyoshi Island, the morning is the only interrupted time we have to train and to be at peace with our own mind and bodies. The rest of the day we’re fulfilling other people’s demands and requests, so it’s hard to carve out time for ourselves.” She folds her arms over her chest, smiling. “But just because I’m traveling with you and the others for the time being doesn’t mean I take a break from training though!”

“Haha, yeah,” Katara agrees, returning the smile.

Suki points her chin at Katara’s empty hands. “What were you up to this morning?”

Katara stutters. “O-Oh, I was just collecting some tinder and kindling for the fire, and then…” She trails off, omitting she got distracted. “And well, I guess I bumped into you!”

“Ah, well just in time then!” Suki exclaims. “I just got finished with my routine, so I’m more than happy to help you out.”

“Oh!” Katara replies, her heart suddenly pounding. “Thank you. That would be really nice. I appreciate it.”

“Of course, no problem!” Suki says, motioning for Katara to go forward. “Lead the way.”

And so the two of them walk deeper into the woods, occasionally bending down to pick up dried leaves, scraps of bark, and twigs as they find fit. Silence befalls the two of them, outside of the occasional crack of branches under their feet and the growing chirping of wildlife around them. While this quiet doesn’t seem to bother Suki all too much, Katara finds herself more and more uncomfortable, feeling increasingly pressured to talk. Not so infrequently, Katara steals a glance at Suki, watching for a seemingly un-awkward opportunity to start conversation.

She never really finds a moment, though, mostly because — as she’s beginning to realize — she’s the only one feeling awkward.

“It’s really nice to have another girl on the team,” Katara suddenly blurts. “I mean, I know you’re just traveling with us for just a little bit and that you eventually have to go back to Kyoshi Island, but for the time being it’s really nice.”

“Of course — the fact that the three of you stumbled all this way down to Kyoshi Island while trying to find Omashu only means that you were quite lost. I couldn’t notjust let you three go on your way without at least setting you in the right direction.”

Katara laughs, stooping down to pick up a choice kindling twig. “But really. It’s nice to have another girl to travel with,” she reiterates, then confesses, “I feel like there’s things that the guys just don’t get, and honestly sometimes I feel like I can get closer to another girl than I can to another guy.”

“Yeah, I understand,” Suki agrees, nodding. “I think women have certain shared experiences, and there’s less sexism that you have to explain. Girls are nice to be around.” Then she looks over at Katara cheekily, then winks. “And I think girls are just prettier — don’t you think?”

Katara nearly chokes on her spit, forcing it into a hard laugh. “Yeah,” she agrees. “Prettier.”

Her eyes turn to Suki again as Suki bends down to pick up some clumps of dried grass, sifting out the dirt on it.

Suki’s right after all, she thinks. Girls are pretty — especially Suki herself. There’s not much comparison for Suki’s thick auburn hair and perfectly arched eyebrows and thick pink lips. Not only is Suki exceptional in looks, but she’s also a warrior, strong and capable of fighting off Fire Nation soldiers even without bending. It’s easy for Katara to understand why Sokka had been so lovestruck for the past few nights, trying to spend as much time with Suki as possible or talking about her every chance he got when she wasn’t around.

Briefly, Katara wonders if she herself is pretty — well, specifically if Suki thinks so. Of course, Katara doesn’t think she’ll ever be as pretty as Suki, but she can’t help but wonder what the older girl thinks of her. Suki is most certainly remarkable to Katara, almost to the point where Katara sometimes can’t tell if she’s inspired by her or if she’s jealous of her or if…

Maybe she should wake up early and have a training routine so that she can be as fit and agile as Suki. Or maybe she should wink more too because when Suki winked at her that was really —

“What do you think about this?” Suki suddenly asks her, presenting a broken end of a branch. “Kinda too big for kindling, right?”

Abruptly pulled from her thoughts, Katara answers immediately without discretion. “I’m sure it’s fine!” she affirms quickly.

Of course, on second glance at the aforementioned branch, it looks much too thick to burn easily, but Katara says nothing as Suki tucks it together with the rest of her bunch of collected kindling in her palm. A moment passes where Katara deliberates telling Suki this, but by the time those seconds elapse, it’s much too late to correct herself now without undue embarrassment.

Ugh,focus, Katara, she tells herself.

This serves difficult to do, however, while Katara’s mind is going a mile a minute. Ultimately, Suki ends up gathering about double of whatever Katara has collected.  

“Well, I think we’ve gotten enough for now, what do you think?” Suki asks, stopping to stretch. Katara passively notes how flexible Suki is, watching her back arch into a neat curve, then looks away when Suki meets her eyes again, stepping towards her to check the amount of tinder and kindling in Katara’s hands. “Yeah, I think we have enough to last us for the day,” she remarks. “And the next time we camp we’ll still be in woodlands so no worries about tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Katara agrees, then startles as Suki’s hand nears her.

“Oh, don’t worry, I’m not trying to steal your hard work!” Suki chuckles, stretching out her sweat rag between the two of them. “Put it into here so it’s easier for us to carry back,” she suggests, dropping her collected wood into the cloth.

“You’re not worried about your rag getting dirty?”

Suki waves her hand at her. “Oh no, not at all. I’ve been putting off cleaning this for a long time, so it’s ultra sweaty. This will make me clean it after we get back to camp.”

And so Katara places her bundle of twigs and assorted branches in with the rest. Suki folds the cloth in half, wrapping everything up into a neat tie and slinging it over her shoulder.

“I’ll carry this back,” Suki offers.

“Thanks,” Katara replies, looking toward the sky, now quite a bit brighter blue than when the two of them first started out. “I guess we should head back now.”

“Yeah, maybe the guys will finally be awake,” she teases, making Katara laugh.

They turn back in the direction they came from. Following their own path back is easy — with two people, their trail is not difficult to discern from the rest of the forest, and they have a clear walk back to camp.

This is very different from Katara’s mind, which is very unclear and very cluttered with thoughts — and once again the silence grows ever more awkward for Katara. Thankfully for Katara, this time Suki disrupts the silence.

“This was fun, just wandering around with you,” she says then.

Katara smiles. “Yeah,” she agrees, then softly adds, “I wish you were around for a little longer.”

“I’ll be around at least for the next couple of days,” Suki replies, brightly. “We’ll have plenty of early mornings to ourselves.” She gives Katara a nudge to the shoulder. “Right?”

“Yeah, maybe we’ll get to do more girly things together,” Katara says.

Suki laughs out loud. “If by girly things, you mean training, then yes! You’re more than welcome to hang out with me in the morning.”

Katara feels a blush come over her cheeks. “Well, I guess, I also meant things like… talking about things.”

“Ah,” Suki says, recognition flashing over her eyes. “I see now. You mean you want to talk about relationships and love and all that stuff.” Then after a moment, she asks, “Have you been in a relationship before?”

“No,” Katara replies, almost guiltily. “I guess I’ve been traveling for so long, just my brother and me, there wasn’t much time for relationships or honestly any people either. I mean, Sokka has been able to catch a few dates here and there, but me? I haven’t even had my first kiss.”

“You’ve never had a kiss?” Suki asks, her eyebrow raising.

Katara gulps. “Uh. No.”

A pause.

“Would you like one?”

Katara laughs nervously. “I don’t know anyone that wants to kiss me.”

“Well, I’m sure there’s a lot of people out there that want to kiss a pretty waterbender like you.”

Pretty?

She thinks I’m pretty, Katara thinks. Her heart may have skipped a beat too.

“I-I think you’re pretty too!” Katara confesses. Shyly, she looks up to Suki but finds Suki’s eyes staring straight at her.  

“Alright. Maybe I’m not being clear,” Suki says, with a coy smile. “But I’d like to kiss you.”

Katara freezes, stopping mid-step.

“I… I thought you… and Sokka…”

“Yeah, your brother’s cute,” Suki affirms, then nods at her. “But so are you.”

“You’ll… you’ll kiss me?”

“Yes, silly. I just told you that I would.”

Katara blinks, unsure what to do — or how to react, honestly. “I…” but she trails off without a proper response.

Suki tilts her head curiously. “Do you want to kiss me?”

Does she want to kiss Suki?! Katara nearly drops dead at the question — no one has ever asked her such an intimatequestion so bluntlyand it’s honestly refreshing.

Does she want to kiss Suki? She’s never thought about it before, but she also is very excited by the idea. Should she want to kiss Suki? Does it matter if she wants to kiss Suki? And why is this such a hard question to answer?

And yet, the answer comes so easily.

“Yeah,” Katara replies, albeit in a small voice. “I do.”

Suki’s grin grows wider, and she rests her hands on her knees, leaning in until her face is right there.

“Well, then what are you waiting for?” she asks.

Katara can’t tell if she’s still breathing. “I just… I’ve never done this before.”

Suki nods and then straightens out. “Oh, there’s nothing to it,” she says. “Practice round then. No expectations. I’ll even teach you.”

Suki drops the slinged cloth of kindling to the ground, then outstretches both her arms to invite Katara in. Katara, as if magnetized, feels her feet moving her closer, one slow step at a time. Once she’s within arm range, Suki suddenly pulls her in, bringing her into her orbit. Her embrace is strong and secure and Katara silently gasps, taking a quick inhale. Suki smells like fresh earth after a long evening rain, smells like cool morning dew.

Suki then meets her eyes. “What’s the most important thing in a fight?”

Caught off guard, Katara confusedly looks at her. “Huh?” What kind of question is —

“Alright, fine. Not fight then, when bending. What’s the most important thing in bending?”

“Your… your stance?”

“Exactly,” Suki says. “Stance is foundational to everything, including kissing. You want to stand your ground and be present. No one likes a weak kiss.”

Katara straightens her feet and Suki hums in approval.

“And for you, since you’re shorter than me,” she continues, placing a hand at the small of Katara’s back, “you want to tilt your hips forward a little — that’ll naturally bring your body closer to me.”

As Katara does this, she inadvertently feels the rest of her back straightening as well, and suddenly she realizes how aligned her face andlips are to Suki’s face and lips. Suki doesn’t seem shattered by this revelation as much as Katara is, and as confident as ever, Suki glides her free hand up to the back of Katara’s neck, cradling the back of her head with a firm yet gentle grip.

“Second most important thing is your grip,” she then says. “See how it doesn’t matter what way your head turns, you’ll always be facing me?”

Katara nods, feeling a buzz rising in her chest.

“So whatever direction you go, I follow,” she explains. Suki then looks down at Katara’s hands, curled and crumpled into her chest. “Your hands don’t look too comfortable there. Why don’t you change your grip?”

Hesitantly, Katara unfolds her hands, quickly realizing how close they are to… well, more intimate parts. Ignoring the heat that flushes to her face, she slides her hands up, her fingertips meeting the slope of Suki’s neck and her thumbs resting against her collarbones.

Suki laughs softly, and Katara can feel the vibration of her voice at her fingers.

“You can rest your hands down on me, you know?” she says. “And it’s okay if you want to put your hands a little higher, or even if you want to use a little more pressure. I don’t mind a little danger.”

“Okay.” And Katara relaxes her shoulders, letting her hands fully flatten over Suki’s skin. Suki’s skin is warm and soft, her body sturdy and resolved.

This position is so nice, Katara thinks. Forget the kiss. She can be very happy just standing her like this for a while. It’s incredible how something as simple as holding each other can derive as much… fulfilment? content? Is there a word that can describe how floridly her heart pounds, how light her breath feels?

Suki’s eyes, meeting hers again, breaks Katara out of her small reverie.

“Now,” Suki continues, “the last thing is to just close your eyes… and lean in.”

“Okay…” Katara says, her voice now a whisper.

Suki chuckles softly. “Why don’t you try that then?”

Katara nods, swallowing hard. And then, she closes her eyes and leans in.

Their lips touch, and at first Katara thinks to pull back, but Suki also presses in and — well, everything is soft and comforting. Warm. This feels more natural than Katara expected, and certainly more delightful than any grown-up novel (that Katara has pulled from her grandmother’s top bookshelves) can describe. Maybe one, or maybe ten, heartbeats pass, and Katara pulls back, worrying that maybe she’s been on Suki’s lips for too long.

She withdraws, and her eyes snap open. Suki’s eyes are right there in front of hers.

“How was that?” Suki murmurs.

“It was nice,” Katara replies. “Really nice.”

Suki smiles. “You want another one?”

Katara leans in without another word. This time, Katara is more confident, and she takes a step in, tilting her head to the right to angle her lips more flush over Suki’s mouth. Suki returns the effort, and Katara can’t help the small hum that comes from the back of her throat. She presses her body against Suki, grips her neck tighter, and applies all the awe and fascination she feels toward Suki against her lips…

“Mmm…” Suki says, slowly pulling away. “We should get back, don’t you think?”

Katara’s eyes flutter open, and she finds herself sighing. “Yeah,” she agrees softly, keeping her hands on Suki for one last second before bringing them back to herself. She folds her fingers together.

Suki reaches down to pick up the kindling. “You’re a fast learner,” Suki says. “Maybe another morning we can wake up early and practice some more? What do you think?”

“Yeah,” Katara agrees. “Wish you were around for a little longer.”

At this, Suki laughs, then reaches over Katara’s shoulders, pulling in to kiss her on the cheek. Katara giggles, placing a hand over where Suki kissed her, feeling a flush coming over her cheeks.

The buzz of Suki’s kiss lasts on Katara’s cheek lasts all the way back to camp.

By the looks of it, Aang and Sokka are finally awake. Aang busily picks berries off of bush branches they saved from the night before, throwing the bunch into a small bowl next to him and gentling shooing Momo away from stealing extra portions. Sokka is on his hands and knees, flattening the canvas out as much as possible with his weight, every now and then letting out a groan and resting a hand on his lower back.

Sokka looks up when he sees Katara and Suki approach the campfire pit. At first, his eyes are narrowed — probably lamenting about having to break down their tents all on his own — but upon seeing Suki, his brow smoothes out and the corner of his mouth perks up into a smirk.

“What were you girls up to doing all this time?” Sokka asks. Katara can hear the obvious effort of swagger dripping in his voice.  “Some girly things?”

“Oh, you know, just picking up some wood for the fire,” Suki answers, without a beat. Then she casts a look over at Katara, the shadow of a smile on her lips. “Yeah. Girlythings.”

Katara bites her lip, ducking her head down to start unloading some of the tinder.

“Ah, nice, thanks,” Aang calls out, floating over to a large pot behind them with a gust of wind. “I was just about ready with this stew, so we can just cook it, eat, and get going.”

“Exactly,” Suki replies, pulling out flint from her pocket. “We have plenty of ground to cover today so everyone’s gotta eat up.”

She motions to Katara to place down some tinder onto the firepit, which Katara does. One, two strikes and a spark catches onto some of the dried leaves. Quickly, Katara feeds some pine needles to the smoke, and once it grows into small flame, she props a clump of a dried grass directly onto the fire.

Soon enough, they have the makings of a very healthy fire at their hands. Katara and Suki take turns picking and choosing the kindling to feed it, watching their fire grow.

Suki fishes out the broken end of branch that she picked out in the woods. She waves it in Katara’s vision field.

“Remember this one?” Suki asks her. “Let’s see if this branch was too big after all.”

Ah, right. Katara nearly forgot about that. She really should have just said something, rather than just letting it all go by.

Suki throws it into the fire, and Katara holds her breath, anticipating the branch to out its side of the flame.

But it doesn’t. The branch burns, just as easily as the other kindling, and their fire burns as ever warm and bright.