#i’m serious

if your icon is one of these pictures please go to therapy

THEYRE GAY YOUR HONOR !!!!!

prokopetz:

More inadvisable ways to introduce a new player character mid-dungeon, bait and switch edition:

• A new character with almost but not quite identical stats and appearance comes hurrying up to the party, insisting that you’re the real [name], and the [name] everyone knew was an imposter; when informed that they died just before you arrived, cryptically remark that this isn’t the first time they’ve pulled that trick
   
  
• A character who nobody recognises speaks up from the party’s midst, acting like they expect to be familiar to the party; if questioned, claim that you’re the deceased character’s personal assistant, and that you’ve been here the entire time, then digress into a rant about how nobody every notices the help
   
  
• Following the next encounter, the party discovers a large, ornate treasure chest, which proves to contain nothing but your character, bound and gagged; once released, any complaint regarding the lack of gold and jewels should naturally be met with dramatic indignation at the implication that you’re not treasure enough
   
  
• The target the party has been sent to slay unexpectedly greets them warmly, explaining there’s been an awful misunderstanding: you’re not the true master of the dungeon, you’ve just been mistaken for the prophesied Lord of Evil, and you’d very much like to make your exit before the monsters figure it out
   
  
• [Spellcaster only] Your original character is revealed upon death to be a fraud with no magical powers, who had merely been impersonating a member of their ostensible character class; any spell effects you seemed to produce in fact originated from a heretofore-unsuspected accomplice: your horse
  

You internet folks have a nasty habit of proposing “bad” ideas that I really want to try.

frownyalfred:

On questions I never thought I’d be asking: how close is the yoga child’s pose to a/b/o “presenting”?

i’m not googling presenting but you get the idea

I know I already posted a tiktok today but this is the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever made in my life. Just don’t ask me what I used for the light lol