Why does everyone think that when they get superpowers they have to either be a villain or a hero or use their powers for some cause. FUCK THAT. I’m using my telekinesis to get chores done. I’m using my water breathing abilities to dress as a creepy mermaid and scare the fuck out of surfers. Man, I don’t have time to develop a moral code or goal. My powers will be used to spice up my life and the lives of everyone around me in minor ways whether y’all like it or not.
Hey, OP, I know you’re busy spicing up your life, but your aunt called: apparently your uncle was supposed to come home after dropping you off near the wrestling arena, but he hasn’t even called, do you know where he is?
The worst part of human adulthood is being your own zookeeper
Like… i have to make sure my meals are nutritionally balanced… i have to make sure that the space i occupy is big enough, and interesting enough, and provide enrichment to make up for the lack of novelty… i have to make sure i get exercise… i’m not qualified for this
