An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar
The first mathematician orders a beer
The second orders half a beer
“I don’t serve half-beers” the bartender replies
“Excuse me?” Asks mathematician #2
“What kind of bar serves half-beers?” The bartender remarks. “That’s ridiculous.”
“Oh c'mon” says mathematician #1 “do you know how hard it is to collect an infinite number of us? Just play along”
“There are very strict laws on how I can serve drinks. I couldn’t serve you half a beer even if I wanted to.”
“But that’s not a problem” mathematician #3 chimes in “at the end of the joke you serve us a whole number of beers. You see, when you take the sum of a continuously halving function-”
“I know how limits work” interjects the bartender "Oh, alright then. I didn’t want to assume a bartender would be familiar with such advanced mathematics"
“Are you kidding me?” The bartender replies, “you learn limits in like, 9th grade! What kind of mathematician thinks limits are advanced mathematics?”
“HE’S ON TO US” mathematician #1 screeches
Simultaneously, every mathematician opens their mouth and out pours a cloud of multicolored mosquitoes. Each mathematician is bellowing insects of a different shade. The mosquitoes form into a singular, polychromatic swarm. “FOOLS” it booms in unison, “I WILL INFECT EVERY BEING ON THIS PATHETIC PLANET WITH MALARIA”
The bartender stands fearless against the technicolor hoard. “But wait” he inturrupts, thinking fast, “if you do that, politicians will use the catastrophe as an excuse to implement free healthcare. Think of how much that will hurt the taxpayers!”
The mosquitoes fall silent for a brief moment. “My God, you’re right. We didn’t think about the economy! Very well, we will not attack this dimension. FOR THE TAXPAYERS!” and with that, they vanish.
A nearby barfly stumbles over to the bartender. “How did you know that that would work?”
“It’s simple really” the bartender says. “I saw that the vectors formed a gradient, and therefore must be conservative.”
[Video description: A compilation of clips from Star Trek: The Next Generation showing the instances in which Picard pulled his shirt. It is edited so that every time he pulls his shirt, his badge flies off of his uniform with a ‘pop’ sound. End description]
You know what’s extra funny? Jedi: Fallen Order takes place in 14 BBY and Obi-Wan Kenobi takes place in 9 BBY, which is five years after JFO.
WHICH MEANS means that when Cal Kestis dropped the entire fucking ocean on Darth Vader to get away from Fortress Inquisitorius by cracking one of the windows–
–Darth Vader apparently said, “If I had to have the entire goddamned ocean dropped on me, I’m not fixing that shit, and we’re leaving it exactly the way it is, so the rest of you shitstains can experience the same fucking thing, because if I have to suffer, so do the rest of you.”
And that’s exactly what happened five years later.
Theyknew those windows could crack, they knew they were vulnerable to that, and Darth Vader didn’t give two shits about it, despite that it can’t have been that hard to cover those windows up, what the fuck do you even need them for, like what are you looking out those windows for??, despite that the Inquisitor’s are Vader’s to boss around he doesn’t fix any of this shit, because Darth Vader IS THE WORST BOSS IN THE ENTIRE GALAXY.
IF HE HAS AN OCEAN DUMPED ON HIM, SO ARE THE REST OF YOU IDIOTS.
WHO CARES THAT HE HAS THE FORCE TO SAVE HIM, THE REST OF YOU CAN JUST KEEP UP OR DIE. HE DOESN’T CARE WHICH.
GOD HE’S THE WORST I LOVE HIM.
THE ONLY WAY THIS COULD HAVE BEEN FUNNIER
IS IF VADER HAD BEEN THERE AND GOTTEN THE ENTIRE OCEAN DUMPED ON HIM A SECOND GODDAMNED TIME
I WOULD HAVE LAUGHED UNTIL I CRIED BECAUSE ANAKIN SKYWALKER THAT’S WHAT YOU WOULD HAVE DESERVED
Is it just me or is it hard to believe Katie McGrath is a real person? She gives me the vibe that she’s some ethereal goddess that escaped the astral plane to come cause chaos or she’s descended from some ancient lineage of vampires. Either way it feels like she was supposed to keep a low profile but ended up accidentally gaining an army of lesbian followers
anyway I have an instagram if u still wanna follow me if I get deleted. Even if I haven’t draw anything remotely nsfw in literally years but ya kno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
AASFDKFDSDJ I JUST NOTICED I put the wrong link Im an idi*t, now it’s fixed lol sorry
