#lov this guy
I absolutely love this guy
I’m going to attempt to caption this. This man talks fast and puts a lot into a minute.
[Video I.D.
Bruce enters the room, clearly agitated.
Bruce: “Alright, which one of you motherfuckers did it?”
Tim Drake, slightly alarmed: “Woah, Bruce, you doin’ good?”
Bruce, so very annoyed: “Nah, nunununu, shut the fuck up. Which one of you did it!?”
Jason Todd: “Well, that very much depends on what the fuck you’re asking about.”
Dick Grayson: “Yeah, what he said. ‘Cause honestly I’ve done like six things in the last four hours alone that could probably tempt that response.”
Bruce, done with his children: “Confess, or I call Alfred in here and he’ll make you tell me.”
Time Drake, calling bullshit: “Nah, nah you’re bluffing. You wouldn’t dare.”
Bruce: “Alfr-”
Tim Drake, cutting him off, afraid now: “Me and Stephanie convinced Damien that petting zoos were like free yard sales for barn animals.”
Bruce, surprised: “I’m sorry you did fucking what!?”
Dick Grayson: “No, no that’s not it. Uh, the villains from the Silver Age that you thought disappeared didn’t. I just fight them alone and don’t tell you about it because I don’t want you to break all of their bones.”
Bruce, taken back slightly: “Jesus Christ, I’m not that violent, am I?”
Jason Todd: “A little while ago I replaced Two-Face’s coin with an identical replica that’s weighted so that it will always land with unscarred side face up.”
Bruce, shocked: “Is that why we haven’t heard from him in like three months?”
Tim Drake: “I painted all of Jason’s helmets blue.”
Dick Grayson: “And I replaced all of his guns with water pistols.”
Jason Todd: “I replaced all of Tim’s coffee with decaf.”
Tim Drake, angrily: “You what!?”
Bruce cuts in: “Alright, enough Jesus. I was asking which one of you told Superman that if he exposes more skin he’ll get more sun radiation. He’s out there in a fucking Speedo.”
Dick Grayson, laughing: “Oh, yeah, that was me.”
Bruce: “Alright, great, come fix this.”
Dick Grayson: “Sounds to me like there ain’t a situation that needs fixing.”
Bruce, sternly: “Now!”
End Video I.D.]
