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Daisy: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, May?

May: … No.

Coulson: I do!

Daisy: I know, Coulson.

Coulson: I’m sad!

Daisy: I know, Coulson.

Virgin Legends: Dudebro Boba Fett accidentally Mr. Magoos his ass into the sarlaac a second time. 

Chad Canon: Tuskan Proselyte Boba Fett goes back into the sarlaac on his own fucking volition after his sugar momma blows it up with a seismic charge.

Giving the character of Boba Fett over to the man who made Spy Kids is the “It’s So Crazy It Just Might Work” mentality that’s keeping Star Wars from devolving into obscurity. Long live the hipster cyborg Power Rangers.

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