So…I’m going on hiatus again, because I don’t like this site at the moment. It’s depressing. So, see ya later I guess. I don’t know how much later, a few weeks, months.
Just had to post this, so no one thinks I’ve died!
THISSSS, OH MY GOD. There was no need to have Mary’s crotch goblin announcement in this at all
*****SPOILERS FOLLOW THIS POINT:****
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It made him look like a selfish jealous creep.
Why did they need to have Mary’s pregnancy in it anyway?
They can’t make Jim come in earlier (or even have them meet in a gay bar) and they don’t have time for a boyfriend in the 70s cos it won’t fit the Predator Prenter plot, blah blah, but they can bring Mary’s 1989/1990 pregnancy into 1985, just so Freddie could act angry that she had the temerity to move on with her life and emphasise the saint Mary thing and this is why people call it het-washing. It’s totally justified.
Like you say, she was the one who wanted a baby with him. Freddie himself didn’t want children. Mary was the one acting weird when she refused to clarify to the press that her child was fathered by Piers Cameron, even when Freddie suggested she clear up their rumours the baby was his.
Well done Bohemian Rhapsody writers for making Freddie look resentful and jealous of Mary’s life when actually she was the one who wanted a baby with her ex, long after he’d left her.
Yo waddup, my peasants? I’ve got a spooky guest post for you!
My girl Tiffany Apan from Tiffany’s Labyrinth and I decided to swap blogs for the day and boy does she have some fascinating information to share with you peasants today! I won’t keep you long, I just wanted to give you an introduction to my girl’s post!
There’s lots of messages you hear about virginity growing up. “It’s a special gift to save for your one true love”. “It’s embarrassing and you need to lose it asap”. “No one wants to sleep with a virgin because they’re clingy”. Virginity or lack thereof is used to judge a person’s worth, especially women’s ‘purity’. I certainly felt the double edged sword of prude vs slut when I was younger.
Historically it’s was an idea created because we lived in a very patriarchal society where men owned everything including women. When a father gave his daughter to her husband he wanted to get the best deal. Before birth control and DNA paternity tests virginity was a way to prove paternity and increase a woman’s value. There’s a lot of this still represented in modern weddings with white dresses for purity and fathers walking their daughters down the aisle and giving the daughter away but the patriarchal institute of marriage is a rant for another time.
Ideas around virginity are sexist. Male virginity historically doesn’t seem to be such a big deal. There was no physical value put on about it in the same way as women. Nowadays men may be judged higher if they’re not a virgin putting pressure on men to start having sex early. It’s often a prize for men to take a woman’s ‘flower’ and potentially shameful for a woman to be ‘plucked’.
Virginity is a very heteronormative cis idea. It’s often classed as penis in vagina penetration. For many people that is not the type of sex they have. What sex is can be a somewhat personal decision. Sexual activity can include oral and anal and using fingers. I’d personally class it as stimulating each other’s genitals for the purpose of pleasure. Only classing penis in vagina penetration as sex dismisses the sexual experiences of the LGBTIQ communities and other people who choose not to have that type of sex.
Virginity is not a physical thing. For men it is not detectable if you’ve ever had sex and looking at the hymen as a test virginity in women is dodgy at best. The hymen is a thin elastic membrane that partially covers the external vaginal opening. This can be different sizes naturally and can be torn from activities before you ever have sex such as tampon use and exercise. When you have sex you stretch the hymen, no need to break. So the idea of breaking the hymen or ‘popping your cherry’ the first time you have sex is not so true.
The first time you have sex doesn’t need to be painful. I thought I was so wise and clued up thinking vaginal penetration was painful for women at first. It really doesn’t need to be. Pain is usually from the vaginal muscles being too tense. If you are inexperienced, too rough or too rushed, then it may be painful and cause the hymen to tear and bleed (hence giving the pain and hymen myths). If you take your time, do plenty of foreplay and use lube then it can be a much more enjoyable experience for those involved.
Having sex isn’t a life altering event. There is no great psychological change that comes from having sex for the first time. With all the social pressure to have or not have sex it can feel very important. Just remember it doesn’t change who you are.
Having sex for the first time can be an important milestone but it doesn’t define your value. You don’t lose anything when you ‘lose your virginity’. So if you’re two consenting adults wanting to engage in sexual activity then go for it. If you’re not ready and want to wait to later to start engaging in sexual activity, then don’t feel pressured to do anything you don’t want to.
