#old magazines

The New Yorker has had many lovely autumn covers; see them here.

This magazine was for Teen girls. Teen.Girls.

Oh, these ugly boxes were everywhere back then.

The nearly $3,000 Sony ViewCam is the most expensive item in this list. The Sega Activator didn’t go over very well.

A shirt with Valley Girl phrases on it.

No child wanted this three hundred dollar globe in 1996.

Why is this tuxedo box of Godiva so expensive?

Yes, its a Pop Up Video book!

Um, this looks homemade. Why is it strapped on the seat arm like a pointe shoe?

Oh man, this is the worst one! Olympics Triplecast was a huge flop that I brought up years ago.

Don’t give your male bio teacher with a “wild side” BATH OIL. That’s not hot. That’ll send you to the principal or the guidance counselor.

Related: Siskel & Ebert’s gift ideas

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Good news, there’s a new post. Bad news, is that Tumblr was acting up at 3am this morning when I couldn’t sleep and was working on this entry. So I wrote it on the Wordpress Backup. 

[so I had to watermark everything because people on the TikTok love to lift magazine pages from people’s websites – aaand I accidentally put my etsy shop or the oher tumblr a couple of times, way2go, dummy]

Noise was a magazine given out by JCPenney in the late 90s. I can’t remember if I got it in the mail because my mom subscribed to the JCPenney catalog, or I picked it up in the juniors department in JCPenney – which probably not because I was a fat kid and couldn’t shop in the juniors department. We moved from my Childhood home in the Summer of 2000, and that’s when I stopped seeing it.

We all know just by looking at this that this is def. just a youth-ed up JCPenney catalog. I mean, there’s a article about … lamps.

Man, i think that “is there any downsides…” question kind of forecasted things, didn’t it?

Here’s some ugly late 90s jeans. Don’t bring these back, kids.

… like I said.

Everything back in ‘99 came in a tin, including this two pack of Arizona brand underwear. I remember seeing fleece jackets sold in paint cans at Peebles around this time. Stila used to sell collections in paint cans around this time too.

Anybody else remember these bracelets? I don’t think the bracelet I got from Marshall’s junior year of high school gave me any powers. Powers to fail math, maybe.

~the future~

Official outfit of every jerk boy in high school circa 1999.

Remember this soap was a thing? Soap with other soap shapes inside? There was a gift shop near me 20 years ago that had giant blocks of these. One looked and smelled like German chocolate cake!

Please help me with this. Is the magazine suggesting that the Backstreet Boys use these products?

Soon, I’m going to devote a post to ridiculous gift suggestions magazines gave us. What kid has $245.

Why would you give a present to the creepy guy in your math class. Come on, now.

Here, have a phone that will fall apart after a month.

Man, the rolling backpack kids. Or, if you were in community college like I was, the rolling suitcase adults.

We dressed like this for school.

Utility vests were a dark time in fashion.

“'hit him, you sissy!’, yelled the bear.”

Here we go everybody, it’s the lamp advertisement/article I mentioned in the beginning.

Believe me, I know from experience, your mom isn’t going to let you hang plastic bottles from your ceiling.

I remember those translucent flower candleholders being everywhere!

I always associate those Silver Tab jeans with the late 90s and the late 90s only.

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When I was in elementary school, my mom would buy me bundles of old Sports Illustrated magazines from the thrift store on the air force base. I’d always pour through the issues, looking at the old ads, and keeping my eye out on figure skating articles. 

Then, this one time in 5th grade, my mom bought me home this massive, nearly phonebook sized edition of SI.The 1984 Olympic preview. That was when I was first introduced to the “Who will win what” section fo every preview issue. The expert opinions on who will win what medals at the Olympics. I love looking back on them, even way back then to see what they got wrong. 

I know some are wondering where the Sports Illustrated issue for 1980 is. In the United States, we seriously don’t know much about that Olympics since the U.S. boycotted the Summer Olympics, with them being in the Soviet Union and whatnots.  I don’t even think it was on TV here. In fact, there wasn’t even a preview issue. 

1984: 

S.I. got the team prediction 100%. 

While we, in America associate Mary Lou Retton with the star of the 1984 games due to her winning the all around, I feel like really, it was Ecaterina Szabo, she won gold medals on the balance beam, floor, and vault. 

BothJulianne McNamara andMa Yanhong tied for gold at the uneven bars.  I was surprised to see Pam Bileck predicted to win a bronze on the balance beam. She didn’t even make the event finals. 

For the rhythmic gymnastics, Lori Fung of Canada won the first gold medal of the sport. 

The men’s results were all over the place. The United States surprisingly won gold in the team competition. Vault, floor exercise, and rings were the only correct gold medal predictions. 

S.I. was asleep on Koji Gushiken, who won the all around, rings, and a silver medal on vault. 

1988:

The Soviets were back in 1998, and the United States didn’t fare well at all. The only medalist was a bronze medal for Phoebe Mills on the balance beam. Hey, S.I. got that prediction right. 

There is absolutely nomention of Svetlana Boginskaya from the Soviet Union, who walked away from the games with gold medals in the team and vault, silver medal on the floor, and a bronze in the all around.  

Like with Svetlana, no mention of her teammate on the men’s team, Vladimir Artemov who won gold medals in the team, all around, and horizontal bar, and a silver on the floor exercise. 

1992: 

S.I. absolutely slept on Shannon Miller in 1992. They, like everyone else was focused on Kim Zmeskal who fell on the first night of competition, in her first event. Shannon went on to win a silver in the all around, a bronze in team competition, and three medals in individual events. 

I guess due to her breakthrough in 1998, S.I. believed that Svetlana Boginskaya could win all around that year. She placed a respectable fifth, but did not win any individual medals that year. 

For the men, VItaly Sherbo won five gold medals in Barcelona. The magazine got his all around prediction correct. 

Oh! I almost forgot about Trent Dimas blew everybody away and won the gold on the horizontal bar.

1996:

Wow, it was as though S.I. had no hope for the United States ladies, predicting a bronze medal in the team event. Of course, we all know who won that. 

I was surprised that they thought that Svetlana Khorkina would win the all around. I thought she was just a master of bars at this point in her career. She placed 15th in the all around. 

While they were correct about Khorkina’s uneven bars win, they didn’t even think that silver medalist Amy Chow was in the running. 

Or, Dominique Dawes winning bronze in the floor exercise. Or, Shannon Miller winning gold on the balance beam.

For the men, Ukraine won the bronze medal. On the subject of bronze medals, Vitaly Sherbo won four of them this time around after a tumultuous time after the 1992 Olympics (left Belarus for the United States, then his wife was in a car accident).

Jair Lynch of the United States won a silver medal on the parallel bars. ‘Yall know he has his own real estate development firm? 

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