photographs

Summary:Eight photographs over the years of Katsuki and Izuku, and Katsuki’s reactions to them, showing the evolution of their friendship: The first four he destroys. The fifth triggers a revelation. The sixth marks a change. The seventh forces him to reveal the truth. The eighth is something special.

Fandom: My Hero Academia
Pairing: Katsuki Bakugo/Izuku Midoriya
Characters: Katsuki Bakugo, Izuku Midoriya, some Eijirou Kirishima, a little Mitsuki Bakugo
Word Count: 3,900
Rating:T
AO3:Link

Other tags: BNHA #306-322 spoilers, pining bakugo, happy ending

Excerpt:

“It’s us,” Izuku said, looking at the framed photo on Katsuki’s nightstand.

“Obviously, dumbass.”

“Why?”

“‘Why’?” Katsuki huffed out a laugh and met Izuku’s eyes. No point in being anything but honest. “Because I like looking at you.”

Izuku hesitated, and then asked again, “Why?”

“Because you’re fucking cute, okay?”

“I’m… what? Why?”

“You really haven’t figured it out yet?”

“Are you making fun of me?” Izuku said, narrowing his eyes.

Katsuki wished that’s all it was. He took a deep breath and admitted what he’d been holding in for years. “Jesus. I’m in love with you, asshole.”

Fic:

“Smile!” Izuku’s mom said, snapping a picture of Katsuki and Izuku where they were all at the park.

Izuku had a huge grin and was holding up a peace sign with his fingers. Katsuki had his arms crossed and was scowling. Why he had to pose for this stupid picture was beyond him, but his mom had insisted he behave, so he would try to hold still for five seconds so Izuku’s mom could get her dumb photo.

Once the Polaroid had printed and dried, Izuku’s mom gave it to Katsuki’s mom to keep.

“This is cute,” Katsuki’s mom said, holding the picture in one hand and ruffling Katsuki’s hair with the other. He let out an audible growl. The disrespect of this woman. “I hope they stay friends forever. Maybe this little gremlin could learn some manners from your kid.”

“Let’s go,” Katsuki said, turning and storming off. Without even looking, his mom grabbed him by the ear. “Hey! Let go!”

“It was nice seeing you again, Inko,” Katsuki’s mom said, ignoring Katsuki struggling to get away from her grasp.

“You as well! Come by some time, all right?”

When they got home, Katsuki’s mom pinned up the photo high on the fridge, out of Katsuki’s reach.

“Take it down,” Katsuki said, arms crossed.The careless grin on Deku’s face, like he was somehow better than everyone else… Katsuki couldn’t stand the thought of seeing it every day.

“No, I like it.”

“It’s cute,” Katsuki’s dad chipped in.

Katsuki jumped to take down the picture but still couldn’t reach it.

“Come on, kid, we have so few pictures of you with your friends. Let us keep this one.”

“Hmph,” Katsuki grunted before storming off.

It took him three days of various techniques of jumping, climbing, throwing things, and moving furniture to take down the picture. He ripped it up over the trash. Good. Thank god it was gone.

Primary School

One of the stupid teachers in their primary school had been taking pictures of the class all year and handed some out to the students at the end of the year.

“This is you showing off your quirk to your friends!” His teacher said, passing him the photograph. In it, Katsuki was setting off small explosions in his hand as his small group of friends crowded around him. Deku included, standing at the edge with a look of awe on his stupid face.

Katsuki looked up at Deku, who was receiving his photograph from the teacher. Just him, working on a piece of art, alone like the pathetic loser he was. Katsuki thought the photo really did nothing but emphasize his lack of popularity. But Deku still accepted it enthusiastically from their teacher with repeated thanks.

Katsuki crumpled his picture in his hand and set of an explosion within his fist. As every person in the room turned to look at the source of the noise, he let the charred ashes of the photograph fall to the ground. He wasn’t much for sentimentality. They should’ve all known that by now.

Middle School

An end-of-school class picture from junior high: all the students lined up in rows in their crisp black uniforms, looking ahead at the camera.

Katsuki received one just like everyone else. It hadn’t been a terrible year, no classmates that were too bad. A lot of morons and extras but nobody who’d really made a point to stand up to him or bother him, except…

Deku. Standing at the edge of the class, with that dumb, wavering smile on his face and his eyes wide. Like he was afraid of even having his picture taken. If he was so scared all the time, then why had he thrown himself at the sludge monster just a couple of months before to save Katsuki? What did he know that nobody else did?

Katsuki’s mom was expecting him to hand over the photograph, but he scribbled over Midoriya’s face in black pen very thoroughly before handing it over.

She raised her eyebrows at his addition. “Seriously, Katsuki, what did he do to you?”

“Shut up,” Katsuki grumbled, storming out of the room before she could ask any more irritating questions.

UA Festival

“Come on, we have to try it!” Kirishima said before pulling Bakugo into the photo booth set up at their first UA festival. First flash. Katsuki scowled as Kirishima switched to a different silly pose. Second flash. Deku poked his head in. “Hey, Kirishima, are you…?” Third flash. With a playful laugh, Kirishima grabbed Deku and pulled him in, crashing him into Katsuki. Fourth flash.

And then some explosions.

Katsuki didn’t want to look at the print, but Kirishima made sure he saw it anyway. “I can’t believe how you kept the same face the entire time!” Kirishima said, his eyes scanning over the four photographs where Katsuki did indeed have an identical scowl and glare in all four pictures. “And look how red Midoriya’s cheeks are in the last one!” He said, pointing at the fourth photograph, where Deku was blushing furiously.

Freak. He couldn’t even take a picture normally.

Katsuki had refused to keep the print, but he still found the picture inside his notebook the next day during class. Kirishima, that sneaky bastard, must’ve put it there when he wasn’t looking, because Katsuki sure hadn’t left it there.

The corner of Katsuki’s mouth turned up in a smile as he looked at the others in the photos - Kirishima making weird faces, and Deku turning red. Okay, even though Deku had been there, it had been kind of fun. Maybe just a little bit. He wasn’t going to hang this picture up or anything, but it might be worth holding on to.

When he stood up after class, the photo slipped out of the notebook and fluttered down to the floor.

Someone stooped down to pick it up.

Shit. Deku.

“Oh, these are those pictures from yesterday!” He said, his face lighting up as he scanned over the photos.

“Yeah, too bad you’re in them,” Katsuki said, snatching back the strip of photos before catching it on fire with an explosion and letting it burn in his hand.

Deku watched it burn, his expression a mix of forlorn and resigned. When there was nothing left but some blackened scraps of paper, Deku looked back up at Katsuki. “It’s okay, we can always take some more next time.”

“Fuck off,” Katsuki mumbled, before grabbing his stuff and storming off, leaving Deku staring after him.

Deku Disappears

“I found these when we were evacuating,” Katsuki’s mom said, passing him an envelope.

Katsuki opened the envelope to glance at the contents. Photographs. He knew what they were from - a couple of the girls of Class A had taken a bunch of pictures at class parties and celebrations that they printed out and distributed to the other students for Christmas. He hadn’t wanted to keep them at school, but something stopped him from throwing them out, so he dropped them off at home on one of his visits back there.

“Okay.” He scowled and looked down. “Hey. I’m glad you’re safe.”

His mom pulled him into a hug, and Katsuki tolerated it. “I’m glad you’re safe too. Stay that way, okay?”

When Katsuki was back in his dorm room, he opened the envelope and flipped through the pictures. There were some of everyone, but a couple of the more central students of Class A showed up again and again. He saw one person stand out in particular. Izuku. Izuku. Izuku.

His eyes caught on a specific photo and he stopped flipping. It was in the dorm common room, during a group dinner. Izuku was smiling, huge and sincere like he always did, looking at his classmates fondly.

Katsuki was next to him in the picture, and the expression on his face as he looked at Izuku was… soft. Relaxed and affectionate. He felt his cheeks burn at the thought that not only had someone seen him looking happy like that, but they had caught it on camera too.

Still, he remembered that night. Thinking about how glad he was that their relationship had changed to something almost like friends, that he was so lucky to have someone like Izuku never had given up on Katsuki. Thinking that Izuku was actually amazing, and that Katsuki couldn’t believe he’d never seen it before.

Katsuki dropped the photos on his desk, tears pricking at his eyes. They’d come so far, and then Deku had just left him behind, just run off to go try to save the world on his own. Katsuki still had so much to tell him, so much to apologize for, and… He missed him. He wanted to talk to him again, he wanted to be near him, to touch him…

Katsuki froze. Touch him? Where had that thought come from? Why would he want…?

It hit Katsuki like a punch.

What they’d had - a rivalry, a tentative friendship - wasn’t enough.

Katsuki wanted more.

He wanted to hold Izuku’s face in his hands, and he wanted to run his thumbs over the light freckles on his cheeks. He wanted to meet those big green eyes and tell Izuku that Katsuki had been such a moron for not seeing what had been in front of him his entire life. He wanted Izuku to smile, for Katsuki and Katsuki alone, and then he wanted to kiss that smile right off his face.

He brought up a hand to cover his mouth, shocked. He couldn’t believe he’d never seen it before. With the amount of time he spent looking at Izuku, thinking about Izuku, why had he never realized his feelings were something more?

He clenched his jaw. No matter how much Katsuki’s feelings towards Izuku had changed, their history never could.

Even if Izuku felt similarly, it would never work out with them, and never should.

Katsuki put the picture back in the envelope and shoved it into a drawer so he wouldn’t have to look at it any longer.

His heart ached as he thought about what was going to happen if - when - they got Deku back. Katsuki would have to deal with this revelation again, with Deku right in front of him but just out of reach.

Deku Returns

They got Izuku back, and now the idiot was sleeping off his month of nonstop work. Katsuki had said what he should’ve said a long time ago, and even if it didn’t change anything between them, he was glad he had.

He took out the envelope of pictures his mom had given him and flipped to one in particular. He’d looked at them a lot while Izuku was gone and he knew exactly which one he was looking for.

There. Izuku with a huge grin and his fingers up in a peace sign. Katsuki scowling with his arms crossed. Almost identical to that picture from when they were kids, the one that he’d torn to pieces but for some reason Katsuki hadn’t been able to forget.

He pinned the photo onto his bulletin board, next to all the blueprints for his gauntlets and notes on fighting tactics. He’d never put up a picture like this before, but the butterflies he got looking at it made him feel nice, even though he would never put that emotion into words, for himself or for anyone else.

Then he frowned. The picture stood out, a strike of color among all the plain notes, so anyone in his room would be able to tell he’d put it there intentionally.

He tacked up a couple more photos to hide its conspicuousness. A picture of all Class A shortly after moving into the dorms; Kaminari and Kirishima arguing in front of Katsuki; Katsuki and Shoto sparring.

There. He could still see Izuku, but now it wouldn’t be quite so conspicuous.

“Aw, Bakubro,” Kirishima when he stopped by Katsuki’s room later. “You finally put up some pictures. Look, that’s me. I made it onto your board.” He mimed wiping away a tear.

Katsuki glared at the board, ready to tear it all down, but he swallowed the anxiety at showing his vulnerability and looked back at Kirishima. “Another word and I’ll blow you into so many pieces that even Recovery Girl won’t be able to put you back together.”

“All right, all right,” Kirishima said, holding up his hands in defense. But his smile towards Katsuki as he left was a gentle one.

Pro Heroes

Katsuki was a pro hero now, number 2 on the charts less than a year after his debut despite his abrasive personality. He was only behind Deku. Katsuki still planned to surpass Deku one day, but despite his continued expression of aggressive rivalry, they were close now after having been through so much together.

Katsuki had finally gotten his own apartment, and it was missing any personalized touches, which he didn’t mind, except… He missed some of the photographs he’d had pinned up when he was at UA.

This is pathetic, he thought as he picked out a photo on his phone. This is humiliating, he thought as he got it printed. I can’t believe I’m such a loser, he thought as he put it in a frame and set it on his nightstand.

It was a photo of Deku and Dynamight talking to the press after their first official debut as pro-heroes a couple of years ago. They’d taken that villain down together, like they had almost every one since. Katsuki was scowling and quiet, but Deku had his hand resting lightly on Dynamight’s arm and a big smile on his face as he explained to the press what had happened. Deku looked adorable in the photo, with the scratches and the messy hair and the optimistic expression and the easy way he spoke to the press.

The photo evoked an embarrassing feeling of warmth and happiness in Katsuki’s chest, and he’d gone back to it again and again on his phone whenever he couldn’t get Izuku off his mind. Now, he thought it was a good addition to his own private space.

That was, until Izuku visited for the first time, a month after Katsuki had moved in.

“Wow, Kacchan, I can’t believe how nice this place is,” Izuku said, running his hand along the marble counters. The place was simple and sparsely furnished, but it had a nice kitchen and a gym. Katsuki didn’t really think much of showing it off. He knew it wasn’t his belongings but rather his abilities that made him exceptional.

Izuku wandered into the bedroom, which was empty except for a bed and a nightstand. The picture frame on the nightstand caught his attention and he wandered over to look at it.

Katsuki froze. It was just a fixture of the room at this point, so he had completely forgotten it was there when he’d invited Izuku over. He cursed himself for leaving it out.

Over the years, he hadn’t felt a strong need to keep his feelings completely secret; nothing would really change if anyone found out. But still, he’d never actually said anything to Izuku, and never had planned to. There wasn’t a point. It could never work out. But hiding the picture would have avoided that unnecessary and undoubtedly uncomfortable conversation, at least for now.

“Kacchan?” Izuku asked, turning to Katsuki, who was leaning on the door frame.

Katsuki kept his expression carefully blank, watching Izuku’s reaction closely. He felt his cheeks heating up and hoped Izuku couldn’t see the color from where he stood across the room. Okay, so maybe Izuku thought it was pretty weird that Katsuki kept pictures of his friend next to where he slept, but he wasn’t about to apologize for it.

“It’s us,” Izuku said.

“Obviously, dumbass.”

“Why?”

“‘Why’?” Katsuki huffed out a laugh and met Izuku’s eyes. No point in being anything but honest. “Because I like looking at you.”

Izuku hesitated, and then asked again, “Why?”

“Because you’re fucking cute, okay?”

“I’m… what? Why?”

“You really haven’t figured it out yet?”

“Are you making fun of me?” Izuku said, narrowing his eyes.

Katsuki wished that’s all it was. He took a deep breath and admitted what he’d been holding in for years. “Jesus. I’m in love with you, asshole.”

“Oh,” Izuku said blankly. And then a moment later, “Oh.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Katsuki said, stepping past Izuku and setting the frame face-down on the nightstand. It was almost a relief to finally have his feelings out in the open after years of not saying anything. Still, Izuku knew now, but so what? Everything would go back to normal soon enough. “My hero work is the only thing that’s important.”

“You’re in love with me?” Izuku said, like his brain was experiencing a serious lag.

“You need to get your ears checked?”

Katsuki turned to go back to the main room but Izuku spoke again.

“How long?”

Katsuki was quiet for a moment. “Since you went off on your own after Shigaraki. I don’t know, something changed when we were working on One For All together. When you left… It made me realize how I felt.” He shook his head, a ghost of a smile on his lips.

Tears welled up in Izuku’s eyes. “Years?”

Katsuki didn’t reply, didn’t even meet Izuku’s eyes. “Yeah, whatever. Doesn’t matter.” He started to walk away again but Izuku grabbed his arm and forced him to turn around and meet his eyes.

“Kacchan.” He licked his lips, which was so distracting that Katsuki almost didn’t hear what came next. “I really like you too. So, so much.”

Katsuki hadn’t been expecting that. He knew Izuku cared about him, like he cared about so many people, but Katsuki never would’ve thought Izuku cared about him like that, not after everything Katsuki had put him through.

“What?”

Izuku sounded more unsure when he repeated, “I’m in love with you too.”

“How long?” Katsuki asked, echoing Izuku’s question.

“Always. I’ve always liked you.”

Always.

Katsuki felt like he should’ve seen it coming, the way Izuku had followed him around their entire lives. But whatever complicated motivations he’d ascribed to Izuku’s behavior before, he never would’ve expected it to be this.

“What the hell.”

Izuku gave him a wavering smile. “Sorry.”

“Asshole. Don’t apologize.”

“Sorr—”

“Deku.”

Izuku held back another apology and then asked, “How come you never told me?”

“I couldn’t change anything I’d done.”

“Oh.”

“There’s some things that can’t be forgiven. We get along fine now, but I made your life hell for the longest time.”

“But I’m okay. We’re okay.”

“That’s not the point,” Katsuki said, not even trying to hide his exasperation.

“I don’t get it.”

“Listen, Izuku,” Katsuki said. “Sometimes you’re too nice for your own good. You never take yourself into account. You deserve someone who doesn’t have that complicated history with you. Literally anyone else. I accepted that a long time ago, and—”

Izuku furrowed his brow and scowled, a familiar look of determination coming over his face. “You’ve told me what I couldn’t do my whole life, Kacchan. That I couldn’t be a hero. That I couldn’t go to UA. That I couldn’t keep up with Class A.”

“Exactly, which is why—”

“Shut up, I’m not done,” Izuku said, and Katsuki was shocked into silence at his blunt words. “Now you’re telling me I can’t feel the way I feel about you. Screw that, Katsuki. I know what I want. You can’t tell me what I can’t do anymore.”

“Izuku…” Katsuki’s throat was thick with tears.

It meant something that Izuku was telling him off. It gave him hope, even though he knew it shouldn’t. Maybe Izuku was right. Maybe they could move on from the past. Maybe they had to.

Katsuki cleared his throat to hide his emotion, and asked, his voice very quiet, “So what do you want?”

Doubt clouded Izuku’s features again. “I want… Kacchan, I want you, I mean, if that’s okay…”

Izuku’s soft, sincere voice broke down the last of Katsuki’s reluctance. The firm belief that he couldn’t be with Izuku, that he shouldn’t, cracked and fell apart.

“Fucking idiot,” Katsuki said with a laugh. At the response, Izuku’s eyes went huge and unsure, but Katsuki still took his time to add, “Of course that’s okay, moron.”

“Oh…”

Katsuki wasn’t sure if Izuku kissed him first, or if he kissed Izuku first. But finally,finally, his lips were on Izuku’s, the lips he’d watched and dreamt about for years. The lips whose image had kept him up late at night, wondering how he could turn off the feelings he had for someone he didn’t deserve.

Izuku kissed him back, his hands greedily grasping Katsuki’s shirt. Izuku’s kiss was clumsy and uncertain, but Katsuki didn’t mind. He’d thought about this first kiss so many times, and it was exactly what he expected, exactly what he wanted.

Izuku pulled back, eyes closed, and even this close Katsuki could see he was an endearing shade of red. “Kacchan…” he muttered, burying his face in Katsuki’s shoulder and trying to catch his breath. “Ah… Sorry… I’ve never kissed anyone before, and I just never expected it to be you, and I really like you, I really, really like you, and…”

Katsuki smiled into Izuku’s shoulder. “Idiot,” he muttered. “Stop talking.”

“Okay.”

They held each other close, the last wall between them finally torn down after all these years. Their relationship had shifted a lot since they were kids, and Katsuki was stunned it had turned itself into this. Stunned, but so happy.

“Kacchan.”

“Hm.”

“I want to be with you.”

“You are with me, idiot. You’re in my arms right now.”

“No, I mean… With you. Like… Your boyfriend.”

Katsuki took a step back to look at Izuku. His eyes were pleading and vulnerable. Katsuki thought about it. One, he’d been determined to avoid any type of romantic relationship so he could focus on hero work, though that reason didn’t seem so compelling right now. Two, boyfriend seemed like an inappropriate word for them, not even close to enough to describe their relationship.

Still, it didn’t take long for him to make up his mind.

“Yeah, sure,” he finally said. “You can be my boyfriend.”

Izuku kissed him again, and Katsuki could feel Izuku’s smile against his lips.

Epilogue

Katsuki stood in front of the newly-printed picture Izuku had hung up earlier that day on the wall of their shared apartment. It was the two of them, exchanging vows in front of an altar, both dressed in tuxedos. Katsuki smiled gently at the picture, even though he had thought marriage was a dumb idea, unnecessary and a waste of time and money. But Izuku had really wanted it, so Katsuki said yes.

Katsuki felt a pair of arms wrap around his waist and a head rest on his shoulder.

“Admit it, you’re glad we got married,” Izuku murmured.

Katsuki scoffed. “No way. It was just for you.”

“I just saw you smiling.”

“Shut up,” Katsuki grumbled.

“Hey. I love you.”

Katsuki smiled again. “Nerd. I know.”

“Kacchan.”

“Yeah, yeah. I love you too.”