The Warren

(O!smp Technoblade x reader)

Short lil blurb for fun

~~~

Technoblade’s arms were crossed sternly, his rabbit foot thumping on the ground in frustration. He was staring out over his carrot warren waiting for a familiar figure to come up over the hills, Technoblade’s fiancé, a rare breed these days. She was all human, no particular origin, taller than Technoblade could ever be with his barely five-nothing self. Technoblade was never one to believe in love at first sight but when he saw her handing out carrots to rabbit hybrids in need he was smitten immediately. It was her who had spoken to him first, he was working on the other end of the community hall and he had watched her for hours. He tried to sneak another look but she was gone, ears fell against his head before he jumped feeling a tap on his shoulder. She introduced herself and his heart fluttered anxiously against his chest, they both were smitten.

That’s when he spotted her climbing over the hills, a basket of carrot cakes in hand and flowers, he couldn’t stop himself from launching into the air. Paws landing on the ground right in front of her, she didn’t flinch, used to his surprise landings by now. The turned-up dirt settled and that’s when you smile,

“Bunny!” You cooed throwing your arms open wide, Technoblade immediately nuzzled himself into your chest. His little pink, puffball of a tail wagging furiously behind him, ears and nose twitching in delight.

“Did you have a safe trip back carrot cake?” He cooed right back tilting his head while looking up at you, you nodded pleasantly hand rubbing between his ears. Technoblade’s pupils blew wide, foot thumping on the ground much like Thumper from Bambi. “I missed this.~” You giggled, you missed your bunny blade just as much.

“I missed you too, but before I give you your gifts you know the rules.”

Technoblade’s ears flattened and he grumbled, the man help out his paws and spread them wide showing off his hand beans. You squealed and he flushed as he did every time and you gently squeezed the beans. However, he couldn’t deny how much he loved you dotting over him it always made him feel loved and cared for. Plus after the childish cooing, he would be granted his gifts and hopefully a kiss, “Alright, alright enough show me the goods.”

“Techno!” You laughed, “Not in the middle of the warren you sly dog.” He glared at you jumping up to knock his forehead against your own, “ow!”

“Not what I meant and you know it. Gimmie the food,” He huffed impatiently, you handed him the basket and he flipped open the lid. He was correct, there were a plethora of carrot cakes most likely from your mother, some flowers you picked, and also some bread and meats for yourself. “God I love you so much,” He picked up the cakes and began to shovel it in his mouth,

“Hey! Save some for me!” You scolded and he smirked, “Don’t you dare! My mom made them for both of us!” Technoblade launched himself into the air, taking him halfway across the Warren. “BUNNY!”

Technoblade snickered holding the cakes to his chest as he stood by the entrance of the Warren, tail wiggling happily. It’d take you twenty minutes to get to where he is at least-

“Hello, Technoblade what’re you doing today?” Startled Technoblade jumped, his hand immediately going to the dagger that was attached to his leg.

“You can’t sneak up on me like that Wilbur!” He hissed stomping his foot, “I could’ve killed you!”

“Yeah but you didn’t, who’s that?” Wilbur leaned over his shoulder, starting at his fiancè climbing and stumbling over the warren’s plants. He paled, his aquatints didn’t exactly know he was engaged to anyone let alone a human. If the Crow Father found out he didn’t want to know what types of things he’d do to you. Technoblade snapped his elbow back hitting the Phantom straight in the face before he could disappear,

“Ow! What’s that for!”

“Instinct.” He blurted not wanting him, or Phil to know he did that intentionally, “My bad had a twitch.”

“You’re bad! You asshole I-”

“Bunny! I’m gonna kill you!” You shrieked over the hill,

“Bunny? She calls you Bunny?” A grin formed over his face suddenly forgetting about all his pain. “You don’t let anyone call you Bunny, is she important to you?”

“Stop carrot cake isn’t-we aren’t-”

“CARROT CAKE!?” Wilbur howled floating into the air clutching his stomach as he laughed, “You all her carrot cake you freak! After something, you like to eat? Seriously? What’s her origin then hm?”

“None of your business. Get out of my Warren.”

“Not until I meet the women who calls you Bunny~” He cooed, batting his lashes, “Tommy and Charlie are gonna love this.” Technoblade never wanted to choke a man out more in his entire life, and just as he was contemplating the Phantom’s murder you came up over the hills. You were panting, hair stuck to your face and forehead, you never looked so perfect to Technoblade.

“You’re a deadman- oh hello.” You stood up straight smoothing out your clothes, suddenly hyperaware of another hybrid present in your home. Technoblade nibbled on his bottom lip, stepping in front of you, and although he didn’t cover you he still felt like he was protecting you. “I’m (Y/n), Techno’s fiancè.” Wilbur’s jaw dropped looking between both people eagerly, his bone-like tail flailing in the wind he reached out his hand and took your own.

“Wilbur Soot my lady!” He chirped eyeing you up and down, “I’m a Phantom! Mind if I ask your origin?”

“Um…” You glanced down at your bunny lover, he had always told you to be very wary of who you told you were a human. Origins didn’t take too kindly to outsiders in their territories especially those as unknown and unpredictable as humans. Technoblade licked his lips before he hesitantly nodded, “I’m just human.” You began to fiddle with the loose wires of your basket, Wilbur’s excitement never faltered not even with the tense atmosphere.

“Human!” Wilbur exclaimed gleefully, “You must meet Crow Father then!”

“No, she’s not…I want her protected in my Warren. She’s under my care here not Crow Fathers. Especially because I don’t know if I trust him, trust needs to be earned and exchanged.”

“But-”

“She’s not going with you.”

The phantom hybrid frowned as you gently grabbed Technoblade’s shoulders squeezing them tightly. It caused the rabbit hybrid to huff, at the Phantom stomping his foot in response to Wilbur’s reactions. “I have to tell him Technoblade, it’s the law. She’s a full-fledged human, they haven’t been seen in these parts in decades. If I don’t it’s practically treason.”

“Fine. But tell him anywhere she goes I go,” Technoblade stated as Wilbur nodded lightly,

“Deal. I’m sorry we met like this Miss.”

“If you think for one minute you’re taking me away from my home you’re going to be sorely mistaken.” You growled lowly, and he blinked in surprise, clearing his throat anxiously.

“I see why you like her Blade. Enjoy the rest of your evening, both of you.” He bowed flying away from the carrot Warren, you slumped against Technoblade’s shoulders.

“We’re fucked Bun…”

“Honestly Yeah…and I dropped all my carrot cakes…”

“Our carrot cakes!” You huffed, “ass…” You trailed off and Technoblade realized it was no time for joking, he turned around reaching up to cup your cheeks between your paws.

“You know I’ll protect you through everything and anything right?” He spoke tenderly, “You have me, so just rely on me.” He hopped up and pressed a kiss to your lips, you flushed and smiled down at your lover. You moved your hand and began to scratch in between his ears, he sighed pleasantly ears falling back so you could get a better angel to scratch them.

“I know you will. I love you Bunny.”

“I love you too (Y/n),” Technoblade murmured, he saw a murder of crows sitting on some of the scarecrows out in the field. They were eyeing the couple, examining their every move and Technoblade knew they would report everything to Phil. He just hoped the Crow Father would see his side of things, and not be cruel to his precious little human.