#personal spewage

just had to explain the difference between streets and alleyways to a delivery driver

hey fam?

so I just watched Everything Everywhere All At Once

great movie! loads of fun

I just have one question:

what

and I cannot possibly, in any language, in any universe, with all potential implications or inferences that could be drawn from the statement, regardless of context or frame of reference (or lack thereof), accounting for all possible experiences both objective and subjective, past present and future, without hyperbole or dramatization

stress this enough:

the fuck

reading about the Crabs™ on mobile and choosing to believe this is a mass hallucination rather than an actual April Fools joke

i’m adding up the total value of all my belongings to see how much renter’s insurance would cost and it’s. it’s a lot y’all. i have so many things

team perma-DST, standard time lovers dni

just made 33 cents on redbubble, looks like it’s time to quit the day job!!!

hate when you have a conversation and then afterwards you’re like “welp, gonna be obsessing over that for the rest of the day”

this year has been an absolute roller coaster of emotions and it’s terrifying but also kind of incredible?

me, desperately trying to avoid going to sleep: I need…more…internet…

me: i just want to be treated like a goddamn adult

me @ my new job: gets treated like a goddamn adult

me: :o

I am currently the tug of war rope being pulled taut between the fear of being sleep-deprived tomorrow and the fear of going to sleep

otb-sweetcreature:

put in the tags:

• your first concert
• your last concert
• your next concert
• your favourite concert

seafoam-blues:

Having internet friends is an experience. Did you eat today? I can’t believe your sister hasn’t apologized yet, what a bitch. Drink a glass of water right now. Want to see a cat picture? I love you. I know you better than your parents. I don’t know your name. I’m having a rough day, can you talk to me about your favorite videogame? I love you. Good morning means good night means good afternoon means go to sleep. Here’s a doodle I made in class. I’m stealing your clothes as we speak, they’re so pretty. I love you. I love your pet. What does your hair look like? I’d love to see that weird leaf. I love you. I’m making you your favorite food. Thank you for holding my secrets for me. I love you. We’re having a coffe date. I love you. I’m giving you a screen-sized hug. I love you. I love you. I love you.

worked the absolute wildest event at work today and no one will ever in a million billion years believe me, even though I have pictures

some highlights include:

- chatting with a salad

- calling security on a rogue juggler

- having a stand-off with a crab (which I won)

- watching penguins tapdance while being serenaded by a mermaid with a ukelele

- meeting Puff the Magic Wizard

- watching a 12 foot tall bird dance to a live 13 piece brass band

- listening to a speech by the Queen of Atlantis

- getting caught in a parade of musical pirates

- explaining sea lion farts to some fairies (or were they elves?)

- politely declining the opportunity to pet the snake dancer’s snake due to quarantine issues

- watching a fake “seal whisperer” try to out-interp one of our interps

- seeing a 10 foot iridescent dragonfly on stilts

- checking Poseidon’s trident at the door

- waiting for a (giant inflatable) pearl to get confiscated (it came with the giant inflatable clamshell)

- getting a compliment from a shipwreck survivor

and, of course, surviving the night and living to tell the tale

bitchesgetriches:

Learn to separate what you’re good at from what you like

This might be the hardest recommendation in this article. There are people who live their whole lives without figuring this one out. And it’s responsible for more quarter-life crises than anything else I’ve ever seen.

It’s really hard to separate what you are good at from what you actually like.

Especially in youth, we get a lot of positive reinforcement for being good at things, especially if those things happen to be something your family, friends, or teachers particularly value. (Remember what we said about how biased parents can be when encouraging their children to pursue their own interests!) And being praised is an incredibly powerful behavioral reinforcement.

Having a natural talent is neither a duty nor an obligation. If you’ve given it the old college try, and realized that you just have no independent interest in it, you get to drop it. Life is too short! You only get a couple thousand days on this planet.

You can be a math genius, and it doesn’t mean that you are wasting something if you decide you’d rather grow rare orchids. If your teacher, mentor, or mom is upset about it, so be it. They might eventually realize how controlling and narcissistic it is to try to force someone into an ill-suited career. Or they may not. Either way, it’s not your responsibility to legislate. You’re not the tool they get to learn that lesson on.

Consider letting the things you love be hobbies

I adore cooking. But I would never take a job as a professional chef. You know why?

Because none of my family or friends have ever sent a plate back because I put too much or too little sauce on something. No one has ever said they loved my food, then dropped a soul-cracking one-star Yelp review later that night. No health inspector has ever scrutinized my kitchen. I don’t have to give the delicious results of my toils to assholeswithuncontrolled bratsandbad tastewholeave religious pamphlets for tips.

There’s a lot to be said for leaving passions out of your career. The love you have for an activity is easily throttled by the realities of monetizing it. Passion makes people burn out. And burn out is among the very worst of adult-y feelings.

“Low and slow”—there’s cooking advice andliving advice. I’ve found success in my career not because I’m splendid (I’m not) and bubble with enthusiasm for it (I don’t), but because I’m strategic. I get satisfaction out of it, but I can set it aside at the end of the day. This approach works really well for my long-term mental health and my career.

-The Actually Helpful, Nuanced, Non-Bullshit Way to Choose a Future Career

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

it can be therapeutic to admit “actually my childhood was deeply fucking awful.” not “my parents tried” or “there were good times too” or “I was lucky in certain ways” but solely to acknowledge “I went though some fucking messed up shit what the fuck was that about ”

thedragonemperess:

Hey reblog this post to give the person you reblogged from gender euphoria

elytrians:

the days leading up to your period will make you think you’re under some sort of curse that’s draining the life from your body and then well that does kind of turn out to be the case

(sung to the tune of Europe’s The Final Countdown)

~ITS THE MONTHLY BREAKDOWN~