#proshot

Best Kept Secret (From “Bare the Musical”)

Taylor Trensch (Peter) and Jason Hite (Jason) in a scene from the musical.

This is terrible.

The music is so bad. I don’t want to say it, but I’m going too, the singing is terrible. They can carry a note but have no umph behind it. There was no big really impressive dance numbers. It felt like it was supposed to be a comedy but the writer doesn’t know how to write jokes.

It could’ve been this great comedy or parody. They have the one dream sequence and then never do it again. How great could it have been to have the Barbara Cartland be Diana’s conscience through which she filters everything. Comparing her real life to that of the romance novels she loves and clearly shaped her idea of being married to a prince. They could’ve leaned into the dream sequences. Have them heavy on in the beginning then as she’s maturing and becoming herself they happen less and less or she interrupts them or shoo’s them away because she doesn’t need the buffer or the safety net. How interesting could it have been to be a fairytale that slowly gets over taken by the real world one song at a time. The set starts in some mythical land then as they sing and Diana waxes on about how romantic everything is you see Camilla as the evil queen and Charles as Prince Charming flirting in the background. Every song would remove some fantasy element that by the end or middle it would be the real world and Diana is no longer living in a story book.

This musical made me question my admiration of Lady Di. eally question it and I don’t like it. They made her seem whiny and fashion obsessed. Which isn’t a problem but it’s like all she was throughout the whole thing.

The character beats weren’t hitting like they were supposed too. She goes from being a teenager with rose colored glasses to a woman whose ripped off her rosie shades but then never really does anything with that. We never see her “grow up” in a real pivotal manner. She is the people’s princess for a reason and while they show her humanness and charm they never highlight it, it’s just a thing that needs to happen. It never feels like she’s driving the force behind the story. The musical feels like an excuse to remember all the pretty clothes she wore. Come on.

The scene where Princess Diana finally confronts Charles and Camilla could’ve been the crucial moment for her, instead she gets the rug snatched out from under her. She never has a big shining moment where she takes control of her life.

This musical did get one thing right, how much we all can’t stand Charles, or Camilla. There was no redeeming him at all. Don’t get me wrong I’m not a royalist and I don’t really care about there infidelities, I understand they aren’t really in a position to marry for love, fine! Go find someone who is on that same page. Don’t go taking your creepy 32 year old ass out getting a 19 year old you can “mold”. That’s gross and manipulative.