#reiner braun x male reader

hey guys, im not dead haha. no harry potter atm, but enjoy this reiner fic since i got into aot again.

Summary:Reiner comes back to Marley to find you moved on, inspired by drunk wqalk home by mitski

Pairing: Reiner Braun x Male Reader

Word Count:1794

Warning: alcohol usage, general depression, a lot of trauma, most of it surrounding reiner.

The fog faded into the cool night as he stumbled home, the streets were empty sparing a few fellow drunkards. He was angry and confused as the alcohol wrecked through his system. 

He was nothing more than a tool. A fool stuck in this mess he created. He wanted to scream, cry and crawl his way out of the shallow grave he was forced into. The two sides of him fighting to conquer his will, how could he live with himself when all he wanted was you. 

He swayed side to side as he walked through the dimly lit streets of Marley. He never wanted to return to this place, not when you were here. How could you be so stupid?! He thought to himself as he stopped to lean against a wall, throwing up what he thought might have been all his inner demons if he didn’t know any better. 

He wanted nothing more than to return to you. To kiss you and love you, hold you tight like he should’ve. What he wanted more was to leave this fucking hell with you by his side, but what a fucking fool he was. How could he expect you to pause your life for him? How could he have not predicted you would’ve thought he was dead by now? A faded memory from your past you wished to forget. 

He had scanned for your face in the crowd when he came home, but you weren’t there. His family greeted him with tears and hugs, but he couldn’t stop peering over their shoulders to catch a glimpse of your face anywhere. He had asked around and discovered where you had gone to when he left, but no one would look him in the eyes when he asked what you were doing now. So as cruel fate would have it, he knocked on your door. 

You answered, looking older and wiser, yet he could see you under it all. A scared kid, hugging him tight as you begged him not to go. Though now you stared at him with wide eyes and a small toddler in your arms. He couldn’t breathe as you smiled, small tears in your eyes upon hearing about his return. He couldn’t say a word as many spilled from your lips. The toddler growing restless in your arms as you cut the conversation short, suggesting to meet at a later date to properly catch-up. 

He hadn’t been gone that long had he? He must’ve been imagining it when your wife came to take the toddler out of your arms for rest or when she kissed your cheek to let you know dinner was gonna be ready soon, asking who your friend was. 

Though through it all you smiled, like you were happy to see him, like you couldn’t see the blackhole forming in his chest once only a small missing piece from his life. You looked awkward having to carry the short conversation when he couldn’t get a word in. 

“I’m so glad you came home safe” You smiled again and his eyes were burning. He never knew you could smile this much, he couldn’t have known you would smile this much. You had to know how long he waited to see it again because you couldn’t stop treating him to your smile. “I’ll have to come see you soon, okay? A new bakery opened on that street we used to play in. It has the most delicious pies you’ll ever see! I have to go now. Are you okay, Reiner?” You said his name and all his emotions bubbled you at once and before he knew it tears were streaming down his face, blurring his vision. 

“That sounds great. I’ll have to check that out.” Reiner said, tears falling onto his jacket. He then turned around on his heel, walking away. 

Now here he was walking down the same road. He would never be free. He wasn’t sure of where he was going, but every turn he took drew him closer to you. He thought about how he was finally allowed to be here, where you were. His armband earned him that, but didn’t earn him you. He could see your door now in his drunken vision, right in front of him in fact. Burning his brain with the thoughts of you standing there, begging him to stay this time and then he knocked. 

He regretted it, regretted every choice he had made up to this point. He considered taking off in the opposite direction, running as fast as his drunken state would allow and never seeing you again, but as his body reacted to his thought, you opened the door. 

“Reiner? What are- what are you doing here this late?” You said, worried as he struggled to hold himself up. His legs had almost bucked beneath when he saw you. “I-“ Was all he could say before he was on his knees in front of you, he looked confused and angry. He looked like he was holding on by a thread. 

“I don’t know.” He said as he looked up at you. Reiner looked like a scared child in that moment, his eyes glossed over with a sad emptiness you didn’t remember being there. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?” You immediately fussed over him, checking him. He smelled like cheap booze and cigarette smoke. He was definitely not okay. 

“I’m fine” He simply said, looking at his hands. They burned with his guilt and sadness. He was tired. “Do you need help getting home? I could get my coat and tell (girl name) to make sure (toddler’s name) is okay. I don’t mind.” You quickly got into action and it made his hands burn hotter. “I’m fine” He repeated in the same tone. “You are clearly not.” You fought back, bringing him inside to sit down on a stool. “Stay here.” You commanded and he obeyed as you walked away. 

His thoughts ran circles around his brain as you walked away. Why did he do this? Coming to you in the middle of the night and disturbing your family. It hadn’t even been a month since he saw you that day. “Okay. Here.” You put a coat on him, it was definitely the alcohol, but he didn’t feel how cold it was. 

“I need you.” Your heart skipped a beat as you pulled his arm around your shoulder, you hoped he couldn’t hear your heartbeat. “Let’s just get you home, okay?” “Okay.” 

Reinwr walked through the empty city once, the previous drunks seemed to have gone back to their homes and you two were the last people out this late. Reiner looked sick and left your side to puke up more of his demons. You helped him up again. The cool air and the fog made it the prettiest night with no one else in sight. 

You arrived at his door, the lights still on from when he left. The room is simple with a small kitchen off the side and a kettle. Tea. Tea was a good idea, you helped him take the coat off and sit down at the stools surrounding the small table next the kitchen. The room looked too blank, no personal items around, no decorations, only one dead flower in an empty vase. 

You made tea with Reiner’s eyes burning into the back of your head. Reiner thought you were the prettiest person alive in this moment, dimly lit by the candle light. You were here right now, when he needed you. You were here. 

You finished the tea and sat next to him, drinking it in silence together. A lot of things were left unsaid to this point. Things neither of you wanted to spill sober, but Reiner wasn’t sober right now. “I cant-“ He tried to say, but the words caught in his throat, willing his tears away. You looked towards him and saw the determined look on his face.

“I can’t  live without you.” Reiner said, blankly. He was going to regret a lot of the things he did here tonight. “What?” “I said I can’t live with you.” He repeated more clearly like you just didn’t hear him. “I’m quite sure you can” You laughed it off and he grew more desperate. “No… I can’t. I can’t live without you… here. You don’t understand.” He held his arms out to you as you laid him down to sober up. 

He reached to your face and both your hearts stopped. You never imagined he was alive and he never imagined he’d live to see your face again. “I can’t do this with you, Reiner. I can… never do this with you.” You said, your throat catching the last few words. Reiner was broken and in his drunken thoughts, you were the only glue he needed to fix himself. “This time I thought maybe we just didn’t have to tell anyone what we do.” Reiner whispered and you were the first to break. 

You gently put your lips to his, forgetting every vow you took as his lips fit perfectly with yours. It wasn’t fair how perfect they fit as he deepened the kiss. Nothing would last forever, but this moment felt like it could. “I’m sorry I never tried to stay for you.” “I’m sorry I never tried harder to make you stay.” 

You both did things you regretted that night. Reiner held you and kissed you like he’d never get to taste you ever again. He kissed you deeply and beautifully as the sunlight broke through the windows. Not for a single moment did he stop to think about ever letting you like he had so long again. 

As you both laid there, Reiner’s arms holding your frame, you felt him shake with sobs looking at you. You didn’t say anything, how could you even imagine what he had gone through up until now. 

“You’re here… you’re really here with me.” He cried out as you pulled him closer to you, holding him. He held you in return, clinging onto you like you were the last safe place he had left in the world. “Everything is wrong.” He sobbed, his breath growing heavy and his head shook in your hands. All you could do was stroke the broken man’s hair, shushing him until he could breathe again. “I’m here.” You said against your better judgment. You wouldn’t be here for him always. You couldn’t. aot

attack on ti

You watched him carefully as he slowly fell asleep in your arms, his breath evening out as his shoulder rose and fell with every breath. You clearly got up, putting on the clothing you had and taking your belongings with you. 

And you left one final time.