I LITERALLY had the experience of seeing Tony Hawk and going “a man” and then he picked up a skateboard and I was like “TONY HAWK???”
Tony Hawk is literally the irl equivalent of Perry the Platypus and Dr Doofenshmirtz. We see him out and about in public and we’re just like, “Oh, a man.” But then he whips out a skateboard and we all gasp and screech, “TONY THE SKATEBOARDING MAN?!”
[Transcription: Speaker is a blue-eyed older man with dark blond hair that falls down his back, a round face, and a moustache and beard combo with some gray hairs amongst the blond. His voice is deep, and a bit choked up at points.]
“These are my red flags for women:
If she stabs me more than twice.
If she has a concerning amount of ex-husbands who died on their honeymoon, like… [a brief pause for thought] Like four or more.
If Gozer the Gozerian asks me to choose the form of the destructor and then one of my childhood crushes walks through New York City at 300 feet tall, uh, and steps on a church… [takes a breath and pauses for a second] I mean, it’s not the height! It’s not the height. I like a climb. But, like. [another breath] She stepped on a church. Or any building, really, ‘cause. [deep breath followed by a brief pause] Legally they’re not supposed to be able to ask you about that on like your homeowner’s association application, but- but they’ll ask. They’ll look it up.
If she doesn’t exist in the same physical timeline as I am… [several seconds long pause before continuing, sounding distraught] I’m not doing that again.”
Me in 2022 when the pandemic hasn’t ended yet because people don’t know how to act right and I’ve been holed up in my house for three years acquiring a new flavor of crazy, going to open the door for the guy in the hazmat suit that’s come to deliver my groceries
i hate this idea that once you reach a certain age you need to stop “fucking around” and finally “grow up”. like you hit 21 or whatever and suddenly something in your mind clicks and in an instant you start dressing like and have a mentality of.. ben shapiro’s wife
The best thing for me, as an ex- Starbucks employee, is the horror that genuinely is the milk delivery when it’s only you and one other shift member. Though, I did end up learning how to carry six individual gallons of milk at once.
today there was a “flash mob” set up by the seniors because it was their second to last day so they blasted the macarena over the loud speaker and did the dance in the main lobby but our headmaster knew about it so it wasn’t even funny but whilst walking past the elevator i found out why they really did this so called “flash mob”
it was a distraction
they put chickens in the elevator
This was wild because I forgot your high schoolers are called seniors and I thought you were talking about old folks
