#so long
It’s been a crazy ride with years worth of GIF posts and hundreds of followers - you guys are the best and I love you all. It’s been an unbelievable time.
My nannying jobs have come to an end and although I could keep posting I’d hate to have NannySeekingSanity die a slow death due to inactivity or neglect! I’ll be keeping the many pages up for everyone’s enjoyment but no new posts are coming. I know, it’s breaking my heart too!
Before I leave you, here are my parting words:
So long!
Farewell!
Auf wiedersehen!
Goodnight!
It’s been great Tumblr!
follow my new twitter please!!!!
for real, if you see a fic that seems abandoned but you really want to see if it might be completed
i would genuinely suggest not mentioning the fact its abandoned at all. instead, just leave the most effusive comment you can. tell the author specifically what you liked. if they are in a position they might continue it, you might remind them what they liked about the story, and thus maybe revive it.
that is probably your best bet to get a story finished, much more than asking “hey is this abandoned” or asking for it to be continued.
Hey friends, long time no post. I’ve pretty much cooled on tumblr since the Great Censoring of 2018, but I’m still making art and I’d love to connect with you in other ways. Here are some other ways!
- Follow me on instagram: @ gem.rat
- Follow my tattoo instagram (I’m now apprenticing to be a tattoo artist!): @ ejtattoos
- Check out my website!
- Buy my designs on RedbubbleandSociety6 - new work coming soon!
I won’t delete anything here but I’m not going to post anymore. Thanks for sticking around and looking at my stuff. Hope to see you elsewhere <3
Hey guys~~ I’ve decided that it’s time for me to leave tumblr for good. It’s been really swell to be here and stuff but I think it’s time to part ways and focus on life. We’ve had some pretty good times, and considering that this blog is only a few months old, this blog has 2.4k followers! And that’s pretty impressive! I’m sorry to those who have just followed this blog recently but, all in all, I wish all of you the best and to take care of yourselves! So long and farewell~~ Oh also enjoy the last few posts in the queue.
As the end of days approach, I got nostalgic for this old place. I know I haven’t been around but I hope you’ve enjoyed the archives and the other amazing blogs which have done thousands of times better at what I originally set out to do.
4 years, 670 posts and just shy of 13,000 awesome folk! It’s been fun people!
PS. if you have any last minute picture subs for me to caption, I’d be honored for them to be my final attempts at lewd creativity ;)
Send pics to: [email protected]
the ‘will people feed you’ discourse rn is very funny and hopefully a wake up call to some of the rude freaks scattered out there across europe, but I do want to note that the cultures we’re talking about are cultures of the affluent. literally everywhere I have visited, working class people share food as a matter of course. everywhere I have visited, working class people push drinks and snacks on you the moment you walk in the door. there’s a layer to this conversation that only exists among people who have the choice to be miserly and unaffected by their neighbours behaving the same way.
the first time I experienced being completely shut out of another family’s mealtime, it was when I was a teenager on an exchange trip to the netherlands. I was staying with this family, and literally reliant on them for food and housing. The day I arrived they explained to me what time mealtimes were, and that I would not be fed unless I arrived at the table on time. One morning I was running a little behind because I had trouble figuring out how the shower worked, and when I came downstairs my hosts were already eating. They hadn’t set a place for me, and they all ignored me and continued conversing in dutch. When I timidly tried to serve myself, they gave me look as if I had just walked in off the street and started raiding the refrigerator. They were an intimidatingly affluent family.
one morning the mother had to drop me off early at my work placement, before the building opened. I was sitting outside on a wall for like 50 minutes by myself with nothing to do, and an older lady running a food cart nearby started chatting to me (she wanted to know I was okay, because I was like 15 and not in school, and was very interested to hear that I was on exchange from scotland). she offered me a free breakfast, and when I said I’d already eaten she gave me a drink and a packet of crisps to keep for lunch, and kept trying to make me try fried things that were apparently dutch specialities but were way too much for me at 8am. she was very sweet and funny, and had infinitely more in common with the poorer dutch students who I would meet at a separate pan-european thing later than with any of the kids or parents around the upper middle class academy we were paired with that year. people are people everywhere, some are just more inclined to worry about appearances than others.
There’s a sort of, “do for yourself and I’ll do for myself” that unnerved me about learning to navigate upper-class friendships and homes. After thinking about it for years, I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s ultimately about maintaining independence and avoiding the class shame of appearing to need others — but the effects manifest as a bizarre standoffishness, an artificial separation of “yours” and “mine”. The class standards they impose on themselves, are imposed on guests.
I was initially baffled that, for instance, family members or friends who come to visit you are often expected to stay in a hotel or at an AirBNB, not at your house. “But you have a whole-ass house”, I would think. “Or floors. And blankets. Lots of things. You can put them in your beds and sleep on the floor, if they don’t want the couch.” Often, they would have guest bedrooms, but these bedrooms were not offered to most visitors. So, you’ve literally got an EMPTY BEDROOM FOR GUESTS, but no?? You expect them to house themSELVES? Elsewhere?? On THEIR dollar? That’s so expensive! Also, to my mind, frankly rude!
I also noticed that my wealthier friends never pick up groceries for each other. They never call or text each other like, “yo, I’m at X, do you need anything”. I think they would risk confusion at best and deep offense at worst, if one of them got a wild hair up their ass and tried it. It’s too personal, implies some degree of inter-reliance.
It makes relationships look and feel artificially constrained.
This is all completely accurate to my experience too. I think a major cultural absence in wealthier social circles is the concept of ongoing reciprocity / gifting relationships. For me, and for more or less everyone I’ve ever met who grew up poor, it is a normal and natural gesture of closeness to offer resources when you have them and to accept resources when you need them. It’s a way of saying that you trust somebody - either you trust them to have your back when you need it, or you trust them to care for you without ulterior motives. I’m talking about small costs, grocery money, meals here and there, maybe a movie ticket if everyone is going and one person can’t stretch to afford it this month. Nobody keeps track of the expenses, you just remember who you have built those relationships with, and you share in return when you get the opportunity.
Larger costs tend to be more difficult, and that’s because often it’s impossible to be sure that you will ever be able to adequately reciprocate. As a teenager I had one friend in particular who was much more wealthy than the rest of us, and he was a wonderfully kind, warm hearted, generous person who would often offer to pay for entire outings or trips on his own so that the rest of us could participate. And it was really, really awkward, because what was a small gesture in his eyes was something that the poorest of us knew we could never pay back. He might not have cared about keeping track of the cost, but we would never be able to forget it, and that would upset the balance of the reciprocal relationship. I don’t think he ever really understood why we would turn him down, it’s nearly impossible to explain what a strong instinct it is when you have grown up with that dance culturally ingrained in you.
All of that is to say that I think my friend’s behaviour ultimately comes from the same background as the people who go through the world hoarding their resources. When you have never been in a position to need a strong relationship that afforded you emergency childcare or a meal of pizza and beans once in a while over, idk, a ski trip once a year, you can’t understand why big sporadic gifts are turned down. You can’t understand why your poor friends keep insisting on paying for their own gas or trying to do you favours you can easily afford yourself. You can’t understand why kids expect to eat dinner with you (because their families would feed your kids, if they ever needed it, and your kids will never need it).
I also noticed that my wealthier friends never pick up groceries for each other. They never call or text each other like, “yo, I’m at X, do you need anything”.
Why did I not realize this until now
my “friend group” had a HUGE falling-out last semester, literally friendship-ending level stuff, because a couple of us would routinely ask if we could tag along to the grocery store when someone else was going there, or to get a ride to the pharmacy ~5min away from campus. There was so much going on but somehow this was the last straw.
Asking to carpool was being seen as unspeakably rude entitlement and I could not for the life of me understand why until I saw this post
don’t go to an expensive private college on abnormally high scholarships, kids. “You’re being given a practically unheard of amount of scholarship money” = “You will be the poorest person at this school.”
Asking to carpool was being seen as unspeakably rude entitlement and I could not for the life of me understand why until I saw this post
I grew up in the upper middle class and I have to say, this is a very enlightening post to read. Now that I’m getting kicked out, I know that I’m about to be so poor that I have to rely on others for help sometimes (without any way to do that because I don’t know anyone), and I’m constantly feeling guilty at the very idea of asking people for anything.
My parents made sure to drill it in my head that asking people for things is rude, and you should never, ever do it, nor should you ever, ever expect it. You have to wait for them to offer it to you, and even then, you have to think carefully about whether or not to accept, because they could be asking only to be nice, meaning it’s not a real offer, and they’ll be affronted if you say yes because then they feel obligated to make due on their offer even when you didn’t realize they didn’t actually want to help. They just wanted to paint the image of being willing to help, with the full expectation that you would not accept their offer,and that way, they are seen as helpful without having to actually help.
Carpooling is actually one of the things I’ve thought about. I don’t have a car or a license, so all I’ve got is Uber to get to work, which is insanely expensive and will eat up all of my paycheck after rent. Now I don’t have anyone to carpool with, because as @headspace-hotel said, all the people I know would see my asking as unspeakably rude entitlement (and I don’t know that many people anyways), and I’ve felt horrible at the idea of asking anyone for carpooling, but you’re telling me it’s just a normal thing to do in poorer circles? They just… carpool? And it’s not rude or entitled to ask for that? And the person carpooling with you is just fine with the fact that you’re carpooling with them?
yeah like generally if you’re not a dick, you’re timely, you don’t get super entitled about it (like angry and demanding or rly pissed if theyre a little late or have a conflicting schedule situation sometimes), and you offer to and then do throw in for gas and maybe like get them a coffee or do them little labor favors back every once in a while like. yeah! for something that’s on a consistent schedule like getting to work, you might ask your roommate who can drive and has a schedule that lines up with yours, and pick up some of their chores in return and on top of the gas & occasional coffee. for smth thats like ‘oh you’re going to X later? I need to go to X it’s right by there. do you mind if i tag along? i’ll [small bribe].’ your bribe might often even get turned down, and honestly, be unnecessary in a lot of situations.
I would like to take a moment to note that, in my experience, if someone working class or lower can’t or won’t feed you, they’ll say so. They’ll say “you need to leave at/before dinnertime” or “I can’t feed you, but if you bring food/etc. for yourself we’re happy to have you” or “hey can you bring a couple dollars for food?” etc.
They’re at least relatively up front about it, and certainly won’t be like “oh we aren’t feeding you” at the last second or whatever. (Although a couple times I have experienced an “oh crap, I forgot to tell your parents you couldn’t stay for dinner, here’s a snack, i’ll call them”)
Posted @withregram • @brianmayforreal So …. without giving too much away …. Here we are, in the arena, running key pieces of the show technically - final preparations for our FIRST SHOW tomorrow !!! Incredibly exciting ! It’s been too long ! And we’ve had time to bring about some new angles - new moments into the show. Tomorrow night at the SSE Arena Belfast, all will be revealed !! Cheers folks - BRI
Sorry I haven’t posted anything in so long. I’ve been pretty busy and honestly kind of forgot about this blog.
Looking back I gotta say, reuploading art with almost no credit to the artist was pretty shitty, and considering Tumblr’s new policy about porn (looks like almost every post I’ve made has the orange tag) I can’t really say I feel the need to post anymore.
I suggest giving e621.net a try if you haven’t already. You can search by pretty much any tag (like “blue_fur,” “spread_legs” “male” or “wolf”) which seems to be the style that majority of requests in my inbox have been. Plus a lot of pics have the source listed on the side so you can find more by the artist!
Anyways, it’s been fun! Sorry for disappearing, but yes, I’m still alive! Support artists you like however you can! Follow them on Twitter, comment on and like their stuff, subscribe to their patreon, etc. I guarantee they’ll appreciate it a lot more than if you’re just finding it on a random tumblr page!
Constantly torn between my need to have qijiu’s insane combination of inability to communicate and mutual devotion end in inevitable tragedy vs my need to shake them around in enough second chances that they manage to change the entire narrative tone of their story.
Tumblr is officially over now. Banning ALL adult contnent on 17th of Dec.
It took me over a year to reach 10k followers and this place has always been special to me. Making this blog helped me with alot of personal issues.
Kinda pissed tbh.
There is not much I can do.
I have a Twitter but idk… If you wanna follow that, go ahead. https://twitter.com/almosttoasty
If you wanna keep in touch with your favourite blogs, I suggest you follow them on their new, alternative platforms asap.
Im really sad rn. Bye
