#sound like i do though right

Basic Instinct

Focus on it too much, and it would be easy to write off eroticism as an entirely physical pursuit, that it’s too intrinsically biological, too completely absurd, for it to be  taken seriously if it didn’t make us hard and wet. We’d laugh each other out of the bedroom with all those bits that flap and sway. It must be impulse, the biological need for us to not see it as something funny, just so that we can continue as a species.

But what little that explains is so far from all that is sexual that such an idea is what’s absurd, rather than the action itself. Kink, and perversion, and even the more vanilla; oral sex, anal sex, make no sense if that’s what you’re going on. I’ve heard kissing is something about assessing the immune system of a potential mate, but quite so much? Nah, there’s something more at play there.

And it would be easy to just write that off as the mental side, but I think it’s more base than that. It’s the rationalisation of these absurd instincts, this irrational desire for someone else that you can’t explain, and you have no control over. Attraction isn’t something you choose, and yet here we are, attracted and being attractive. Turn it into a game, something you can twist and turn and enjoy in all sorts of ways, and you’re imposing just about as much autonomy as it’s possible to impose. 

It’s why I enjoy watching two girls kiss, and why my hips will involuntarily thrust forwards when you tease me with that delicious tongue. It’s why I tie you up, and why I like hurting you so very, very much. Well. It’s one of the reasons.