Idea for this one came from this prompt. Definitely an AU, wherein Susan and Diane met earlier than in canon.
Diane’s date shrank away a little. “Oh, come on. It sounds like a better idea than puking our guts out all day, doesn’t it?”
“First off - if all it takes to get you to throw up for eight hours straight is riding one thrill ride… ew. Second, I’m not going to neckon Pirates of Lake Michigan.”
“Why not? It’s dark, there’s plenty of room between the boats…” He tried to sidle up to her again. Diane stepped back.
“There are security cameras over every square inch of the ride.”
“They won’t see-”
“Infrared cameras. Second, do you really get turned on around the smell of water that probably hasn’t been changed since this park opened?!”
“I-”
“Look, you want to ride that, feel free. I’m going on something else.”
“O-okay? Uh - where should we meet up?”
“School. Maybe. Later.” She stormed off, pulling her phone out of her bag. The Midwestern Kingdom was a weird park - it had started out as a blatant ripoff of Disneyland, a la Nara Dreamland, and had grown into its own thingin the seventies. The odd ‘WE CAN’T SAY DISNEY BUT THINK DISNEY’ elements were interspersed through thrill rides that were too odd to be picked up by King’s Island or Cedar Point. And while it was normally just open in the summer, it did open its doors for a ‘spring preview’ one week a year.
Naturally, two thirds of her school was there, despite the lingering chill in the air.
NoBottleBlonde: Did you make it out here?
If Lucy was there, she could get a ride home with her. Odds were slim, given what she’d said, but-
XenaWasRight: Nope. XenaWasRight: Car’s still broken down. XenaWasRight: And I never knew fixing it would be this fun. NoBottleBlonde: Fun? Seriously? XenaWasRight: Hey, what can I say, the company makes the activity. XenaWasRight: Gotta go. We’re lifting the engine out. NoBottleBlonde: What? What company? NoBottleBlonde: Lucy? NoBottleBlonde: I WANT DEETS LATER.
Well. Crap. Good that Lucy was having a date she was enjoyingfor once, even if ‘fixing her car’ wasn’t technically a date, but… that left her alone in the park. Unlesssss…
NoBottleBlonde: Hey, are you and your dork friends here? TrillHitchhiker: I choose to take that term as a compliment. And yes. NoBottleBlonde: YES. Okay, my date turned out to be a real creep. Mind if I hang with you guys? TrillHitchhiker: Oh no. I am terribly offended. How dare you suggest such a thing. Gasp. I think I have a case of the vapors. NoBottleBlonde: :P TrillHitchhiker: We’re split up at the moment. Most of us are in one line or another, but we’re meeting in 30 minutes at the entrance to El Torqueno. NoBottleBlonde: I’m heading there now. Can’t believe that guy was too wimpy to even try riding it… TrillHitchhiker: …the vast majority of our party is too. NoBottleBlonde: PFFT. I’m trying it. See you there soon.
She closed down the phone and headed for the new ride. It was an intimidatingcoaster. A bright orange steel thing that wound in and out of ambiguously-industrial theming. Each pair of seats were also able to rotate around end over end. It was fast. It was intense. And - yes, if you had a weak stomach… but she was made of sterner stuff. She could manage it.
Right? Right.
The line wasn’t especially interesting. She did enjoy the fact that they were at least trying to build suspense, letting the line cut past several stretches of track, so you could hear the screams and roar of the ride and really soak in what was going to happen. She didn’t notice the sign until she was in sight of the boarding platform.
Single riders will be paired.
Oh. Great.
She looked around rapidly, trying to make sure the creep wasn’t there. No. No, he hadn’t been clever enough to try to pull that. Good. So she had to ride with a stranger, but that wouldn’t matter much. It was just one ride, and then she’d be with her… estranged nieceCousin by blood friend and her friend’s friends. God. So much easier to ignore the blood relation. The last few minutes of wait were short, and then she was there, waiting on the platform alone as the operator herded her to a seat right at the back, and - then waved over another girl about her age. Shorter. More pear shaped, though she definitely made it work. Also blonde. She said something, though it was drowned out by the sound of the ride and the music over the PA. Diane just shrugged in return. The other girl grinned, rolled her eyes, and gestured to the seat. In they went, and the harnesses clicked into place… and that was it. A minute passed. Two. And then they were heading for the lift hill. The girl next to Diane let out a whoop.
“AWESOME! I’ve been waiting for this for a YEAR!”
“Seriously? Are you that much of a coaster junkie?”
“Maybe? I dunno. I mean, I only ever go here…”Diane craned her head around. The other girl gave a hapless shrug, barely visible in the harness, still grinning. Diane just laughed once. Eh, what the hell. She could drop the thin veneer of self control and just enjoythis for once. Her enthusiasm was infectious. They crested the lift hill, and for a moment they were all screaming, and then - DOWN. The speed was everything, plunging them through a canyon of rust and gray, before it twistedto the side, and then they were flippingbackwards, making it impossible to see where they were going - and the disorientation, the shock, the sheer adrenaline was so good,so pure, so cleansing, that Diane found herself screamingalong with everyone else, venting her nerves and her delight and the sheer sensory overload of it.
Somewhere around the cobra roll, she found herself grabbing the other girl’s hand. She had been sort of flailing, and - wow, she had a HELL of a grip, and - she barely registered that for the rest of the ride. Not until they lurched to a stop in front of the station, and everyone started cheering. They were not quite upright, and the cars took a moment to spin them slowly into place before they advanced to the platform to unload with a loud hiss.
The bars were lifted. They stumbled out, dizzy and laughing and flushed, and staggered towards the exit.
“Oh. My. Fuzzy. GOD. That was amazing!” The shorter girl blurted. “That… that was better than I hoped for!”
“I KNOW, RIGHT?” Diane was tryingnot to gush. “I swear, I - I nearly blacked out for a second. I - holy - frickI can’t even think straight right now.” She stumbled, and nearly fell, only to slump over on the shorter girl, who burst into giggles again - as someone cleared their throat nearby.
“Well. I was going to tell you that we were waiting for Diane, but you found her. Ah - Diane, Sarah. Sarah, Diane.” Susan was standing at the bottom of the ramp, next to Justin, Elliot, and… well… the whole rest of Susan’s little crew. A curvy black girl (Grace, that - that washer name, right?) gave her a MASSIVE smile, grabbing the arm of another girl with a mop of purple hair. She was squeeingin an almost inaudible pitch.
“Yeah, yeah, we rode together. You… you don’t know what you’re missing. I swear, I’m still high off the vertigo.” Sarah nudged Diane upright, and - that was when both of them realized they were stillholding hands. And that they had been clutching each other so hard that they probably had bruisesfrom each other’s fingertips.
Oh.
Oh.
That… probably shouldn’t have gotten a blush out of Diane, but-
“So which ride’s next? We gotta pick something a littletamer for these guys, but - we all up for the Steel Noodle?” Sarah didn’t let go. If anything, she gave her hand another squeeze before pulling her towards the next ride.
She really had to send that creep a thank you letter. A severely passive aggressive thank you letter, but a thank you all the same.
(A/N: The roller coaster type in question is probably nonexistent, but is based on the same concept as a ‘4th Dimension’ roller coaster, albeit with more traditional coaster elements.)
Susan’s mother stared at her blankly. She took a sip of her tea, her gaze unwavering.
“I’m not about to call you a liar, dear, and I’m sure that most if not all of what is in that mug came out of the coffee pot, but that’s one of my good Bailey’s mugs. I keep them in the liquor cabinet for a reason.”
“You keep most of them in the liquor cabinet. This one was in with the rest of the mugs in the cupboard.” The older woman continued her stare unabated. She sipped her tea again. Susan sighed, and slid the mug to her. “Feel free to test. I’ll be getting myself a fresh mug.” She didn’t wait until Susan was out of the room to sip - and nod once. No booze. Of course. She realized that her mouth was running as she got to the kitchen, but didn’t bother to shut it off. The grumbling was mostly under her breath, and she didn’t really vent much, if at all. Her usual reaction was to simply shut down or to rage atop her lungs in as eloquent and forceful a manner as she could. Grumbling was novel in a way. As she added creamer to the cup, her mother entered the kitchen.
“You must forgive my suspicion, dear. You are at that age, and you’ve been through more than most people your age.”
“I’m aware.” Susan’s tone was carefully neutral.
“But with that said, I can’t condone certain… coping mechanisms. If you do feel the need to-”
“I don’t.” There was a long moment of silence in the room, before Susan snatched her keys from the rack and headed for her car. She needed some air. There were things not said. ‘My coping mechanisms are not your own’ was the primary one.
“ ‘Important message regarding your student loans’, which I don’t have… delete. ‘Latest updates from-’ a news blog I unsubscribed from last year… delete.” Susan mumbled to herself as she cycled through her email, picking out the obvious chaff from things that needed to be saved.
IJustWannaFly: are you getting more emails since we started doing movie reviews?
The message from Elliot wasn’t entirely unexpected, though the topic wasn’t something she thought she’d see for a while yet.
TrillHitchhiker: Not particularly.
TrillHitchhiker: I’ve had a few that have managed to track me down, but most of my ‘fan mail’ has been in the form of comments on our videos.
TrillHitchhiker: Mostly I stopped reading them after hitting the comments about how I need to eat a sandwich.
She took another long sip of her lemonade while Elliot typed. Gods bless him, he needed to learn where the shift key was. At least he was usually better about it when he had a physical keyboard - she had a feeling he was on mobile at the moment.
IJustWannaFly: so I guess its just me then?
TrillHitchhiker: Probably. How are they getting your email, anyway?
TrillHitchhiker: You haven’t put it up on the videos.
TrillHitchhiker: And we don’t exactly have a ‘contact us’ page anywhere.
IJustWannaFly: I don’t know!
IJustWannaFly: maybe my facespace account?
TrillHitchhiker: Facespace.
TrillHitchhiker: I can imagine your details getting leaked from that page.
TrillHitchhiker: You left it on a comment there, or some such?
IJustWannaFly: uh
IJustWannaFly: well I mean its kind of right there on my page
He wasn’t that dense, was he?
TrillHitchhiker: You have your email set to ‘publicly visible’ on your Facespace.
IJustWannaFly: yes?
TrillHitchhiker: …is your page set to ‘friends only’?
IJustWannaFly: no?
TrillHitchhiker: How many ‘fan mails’ did you wake up to?
IJustWannaFly: 3000ish?
IJustWannaFly: but like half are from the same address
TrillHitchhiker: Burn the address.
TrillHitchhiker: Make a new one. Do not put it on any social media.
TrillHitchhiker: Salt the earth and move on.
IJustWannaFly: is that really necessary?
TrillHitchhiker: SALT THE EARTH AND MOVE ON.
IJustWannaFly: we only have 1000 subscribers. it isn’t like that’s this big a deal is it?
“-but if you look at the physics, everything checks out. So Remnant’s moon is actually what’s left of a titanic Grimm.” Tedd ended his argument with both arms raised triumphantly in the air.
Susan just looked at him with an eyebrow raised. “Not believing it. Grimm dissolve, and the shattering pattern is all wrong anyway.” She folded her arms, ready to resist any argument.
“Fiiiiine. I’ll prove it to you. I’ve got a physics engine on my computer at home; let’s finish up here and then I can show it to you. I promise you it’ll make sense.” Tedd took a massive bite of his burger and washed it down with half his Coke. “Jesh guffmh uhn manuh.”
“No. Eat your food like a normal person.” As if to set an example, Susan took ten minutes to finish her meal. By the end of it, Tedd was wriggling with impatience in his seat.
“C’mon, let’s go already! We could’ve started simulating already!”
Susan sighed. “I’m done now. Toss my-“ Before she could finish her sentence, her tray was whisked away from her by Tedd and thrown wholesale into the nearest garbage can. “You know you’re not supposed to throw away the tray too, right?”
Tedd wasn’t there, however. He had already bolted out the door and was standing by Susan’s car, dancing in place.
“I’m tempted to just leave you here, but now I’m curious.” At a reasonable pace, Susan followed her friend and unlocked her car. “Get in, and don’t touch anything.”
–
As soon as he unlocked the front door, Tedd nearly dove headlong down the basement stairs and into his desk chair. “Give me five minutes and I’ll put all the parameters in and have it ready to start calculating.”
Susan leaned over the back of Tedd’s chair, keeping half an eye on the numbers he was inputting as she idly mused. Who knew a year ago that today we’d be the best of friends? Hell, I still thought he was just a perverted, misogynistic jerk back then. She let her eyes wander over the TF guns and the myriad of watches Tedd had laid out. He’s still a little odd, but… he’s a good friend. I’m just glad I looked beyond what I thought back then. It’s hard to find someone to talk nerdy science with. Justin’s great, but he leans more toward technobabble. She looked down at the back of Tedd’s head and smiled. Huh. Turns out I really l-
“Susan, are you okay? You’ve been pretty quiet for a while.” Tedd twisted around to look at his friend, worried.
And we’re kicking off EGS Flashfic week! Our first submission is by @bdigfreakingwooper - thanks again, though it’s less a contest and more a general celebration of EGSness. :)
“Maybe I’m missing something, but…” “No, no, you’re right. The movie completely undermines its own moral.” “Really? Oh man. I’m giving myself a cookie right now.”
Starring: Elliot and Susan, acting out of character for the camera.
Elliot stood up, but instead of heading towards the kitchen like Susan expected him to, he opened up a drawer, paused a moment, and sighed. “What are you doing?” “My cookie drawer is empty.” “You have a cookie drawer? Why do you have a cookie drawer in your room?” “Well, I don’t now. It doesn’t have any cookies in it anymore. Give me a minute, I’ll be back.” As Elliot headed off to the kitchen, Susan was left alone with the camera. “What… Why does he have a cookie drawer? That just seems unsanitary, there could be ants.”
A few minutes passed before Susan started getting impatient. “Alright, what’s going on? There’s no possible way that getting a cookie could take that long.” Susan reached out to turn off the camera, but, struck by a whim, she left it on. If they had to edit out the pause anyway, a few more minutes wouldn’t hurt…
The camera dutifully continued to record the empty couch as voices emerged from offscreen.
“Did you actually start baking cookies in the middle of a recording session, Elliot?!” “We were out! Besides, this won’t take long. I said I was getting a cookie right now and I will.” “It’ll take at least thirty more minutes! Get back here and finish the review!” “Or it could be twice as hot and take half as long…” “Elliot, that’s not how cooking works.” “One minute at 10000 degrees!” “Elliot you are not doing this again.” “I shall harness the power of the sun to bake these cookies in a single second!” “… If you burn your house down I’m not covering for you.”
