#ttp incorrect quotes

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rupert: go tell him he’s cute. what’s the worst that could happen?

percy: he could hear me.

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cecily: hey, i can cook!

joan: offering people gum is not cooking.

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percy: you’re over me? when were you… under me?

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rupert: well

rupert: a gay’s gotta do what a gay’s gotta do

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percy: ah, yes, baguettes. the snakes of bread. we’ll take two of your freshest yeasty eels good sir

waiter: ….what

darling: ignore him

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cecily: so you like guys?

percy: yeah. probably. i dunno

cecily: three wildly different answers to that question

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Chamberlain: when I asked you to bring me back something from the beach I meant like… a shell or something.

Barabbas, struggling to hold onto a seagull: well you didn’t fucking say that!

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darling: i don’t have a brain, actually. my head is just filled with lots and lots of dried flowers.

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amir: as you can see, we’re professionals.

rupert in the background: BABE I JUST CAUGHT A FLY WITH MY BARE HANDS

amir:

amir: as you can see, i’m a professional

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joan: what are you doing

cecily, spreading toothpaste on a piece of toast: i’m multitasking

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barrabas: write “nothing is set in stone” on my grave as both a witty pun and a subtle warning that i’ll be back

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rupert: ah, yes, my train of thought

rupert: or as i like to call it, the anxiety express.

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percy: i may be short, but it doesn’t mean i’m innocent

percy: *aggressively attempts to open a caprisun*

darling: need any help with that

percy, softly: yes please