#tune in for the finale tomorrow

Time for the fifth elimination and JEEEEEZUZ is this an extremely close race.

Despite an extremely clever gameplay strategy, Kripton Kroker has fallen ever so slightly short, and is the latest eliminated contestant from Will Sparks Fly? meaning Jake and Luna will be battling it out for the last day to win Ash’s heart. Nobody really got to know Kripton - despite his very outgoing personality, he only really engaged with Ash, and had zero chemistry with anyone else.

Kripton, you played an impressive gam-

Kripton: This is outRAGEOUS! There is simply no way Ash prefers me to leave over those two cretins. Nobody has played a better game than I have, and I only ever had a single bolt with him!

About that-

Kripton: The thing that pisses me off the most is I worked harder than any of the other contestants to get Ash’s attention.

You picked your moments extremely well and-

Kripton: I DID! While the others messed around with the karaoke machine and got drunk at 6am, I was planning and plotting. Plotting and planning.

You certainly flew under the rad-

Kripton: That was always my plan. Start out slow and let others burn out, and then pounce like a viper and take the kill.

Looks like you might have taken it just that tiny bit too slow.

Kripton: I guess Luna and Jake are the two biggest vipers in the house. *starts weeping*

Thanks for letting me get one full sentence out. Now, it’s time for you to leave.