#when my name was earl
Series: Noragami
Pairing: Gen
Genre: Humor, Parody
Rated: k
Words: 333
Summary: Living a long time is hard, and Father can’t keep track of years and calendars and things, it’s easier for him to refer to time periods by the name of the incarnation he was inhabiting, but Yato absolutely hates it.
*An- I will never write a serious father fic. Also I thought it was funnier if father had wildly out of context names for historical japan. Also for the my name is earl reference.
x x x x x x
“I haven’t seen anyone dressed like that since I was Richard.”
Yato scream groaned, trying to veer away from his father, but father reached out without looking and grabbed the back of his kimono, all too familiar with the behaviors of his son.
“Maybe he was a member of an acting troupe, perhaps they’re doing a period drama.”
“It hasn’t been long enough since I was Richard for period dramas, has it?”
“It’s been a while, what, four incarnations?”
“Four?” Father repeated with disbelief. “The time flies.”
Yato didn’t participate in the discussion, he was too busy grinding his teeth and considering shirking out of his clothes and making a break for it naked. It’s not like any of these people could see him, but the idea of running into Bishamon while fully nude kept him suffering through this terrible conversation with his family.
“Now that assassination, the one that was stolen right out from under us, that happened when I was Steven?”
“No,” Hiiro said pointedly, “You were Kyle.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes I’m sure, Father.”
“And I was Garett when Yato lost his first tooth?”
“Yato doesn’t lose teeth, he’s a god.”
“He doesn’t lose them to regrow adult teeth, I’m talking about the first time he was clocked so hard a tooth fell out.” Hiiro laughed at the memory and Yato growled under his breath.
“Yeah, I do remember that, he spoke with a lisp for three days before the tooth grew back!” She laughed. “Oh those were good times.”
“I fucking hate you guys.”
“Well that’s certainly not something I haven’t heard since my name was Earl.”
“I am literally BEGGING you to buy a fucking calander oh my GOD!” Yato shouted, so loudly that some people nearby actually caught sight of them and gave him funny looks. “Why are you so weird?!”
“When you’ve lived as long as I have it’s hard to keep track of things,” Father whined, sneaking an amused look at Hiiro when Yato scowled.
