~To start off, this is the only thing I’ve written so far that I would even consider writing a part 2 for, if requested enough. This is a sad one lol. It also has a lot of Jeff in it. Thank you again for all of your support. Requests are open!!❤️~

Everyone was staring at you. You were the talk of the school. No matter what group, everyone knew what had happened to you. What had happened to your whole family. Everyone knew that you hadn’t been to school in almost a month. If it weren’t for your needing to be there for attendance, you probably would have stayed gone longer. Well, your parents were a factor too. You were heart broken and sad and confused. Everything imaginable. Your brother was dead. Jeff Atkins was dead.

You remembered that night like it was yesterday. You’d been at the same party as him. In fact, you were completely blasted. Your boyfriend, Montgomery De La Cruz was taking care of you as you blubbered about random things. Jeff had said he’d like to drop you off to your guys’ house while he was out on the beer run that he’d been asked to do. You’d refused, even after Jeff and Monty both persisted that you do so. So Jeff took off into the night. Little did you know, your drunken refusal would be your last interaction with your brother. And a mere hour and a half later you’d get a very frantic call from your mother. You, still out of it, were not comprehending the seriousness of the situation, forcing Monty to take your phone and work out what your mother was talking about. His teammate, and one of his best friends, had been in a fatal car accident. Without a word to anyone, he’d leapt up, throwing you over his shoulder, knowing he didn’t have time for your antics, and ran out to his car.

Five minutes later, you understood. No amount of drugs and alcohol could have ever kept you from noticing the body bag, and your mother hiding her face in your Father’s chest in sheer horror. Nothing was going to take away the fact that your brother was in the body bag, that he was dead.
You remembered screaming at the top of your lungs, eventually trying to run over to the paramedics that were tending to Jeff’s body. Monty stopped you, turning you back around and pulling you into him. You could feel his heart pounding. You kept demanding things, as if they could be done or changed. ‘Give him CPR’ you’d bellowed. ‘Wake him up.’

Monty refused to leave your side after that. His baseball coach had given him four games off without any grief. He felt the loss of Jeff too. Monty said he wanted to wait until you could handle yourself before he tried to go back to normal.

Your parents didn’t say anything when you refused the idea of Monty leaving your bed at night. In fact, Monty had spent every night with your emotionally drained body since the accident.

No one saw it coming, Montgomery caring about someone so much. Jeff had been suspicious of his motives when he’d first asked about you. But there was no mistaking the way his eyes lit up when he saw you in the stands at their games. Or the way he’d talk to himself, as though he was practicing what he was going to say to you. He liked you. And your lack of reluctance towards him scared not only Jeff, but your friends as well. He was, well he was a 'fuck boy’. It surprised everyone even more when he gave you a 'ring on a string’ for your six month anniversary, when the first I love you’s were said.

“Montgomery said he wished he could have walked you to class, Y/N.” Hannah’s voice shook you out of your daze. You nodded, she was right.

“I told him, baseball’s his future. If coach wants him to practice, he needs to.” You spoke in a hushed tone. A sharp contrast to your normally spunky, louder voice. But this was the voice you’d grown accustomed to. There was no reason to be so cheery or chirpy.

“You look nice in your dress.” Hannah continued. She was another person who’s sympathy you’d been receptive of. She seemed genuine, not nosy. You didn’t care what Monty had to say about how she 'got around’. She was a good person.

“Monty bought it for me last week.” You said. You could feel her wide smile on you.

“He takes good care of you, yeah?” She asked. You couldn’t help but smile, you liked the honest answer you were able to give.

“Yeah. I used to take care of him too.” Hannah stopped in the middle of the hallway, and turned you so you had to look at her.

“After everything, I’m sure he’s aware it’s his time to be caring for you, Y/N.” you nodded, not in the mood to wallow in your self pity aloud.

“See your knight in shining armor?” Hannah nudged you, gesturing for you to look forward. You looked up and saw Monty with his friend group. It was good to see him with them. He’d kind of wiped them out of his life to take care of you.

That didn’t stop him from perking up when he saw you walking down the hall. He smiled as he walked towards you. Hannah unlinked arms with you, as if her shift was over. There was a pregnant silence between Monty’s friends and Hannah. God, they were all judging her. And it clearly was making her uncomfortable.

“I’ll see you in gym, Y/N.” Hannah rubbed your shoulder softly before beginning to walk away.

“Stay?” You asked simply. Looking into her eyes. She paused, thinking about it for a moment.

“No, I think you’re in good hands now.” She smiled gently before walking away and out of the hallway.

“I don’t get why you like her so much.” Monty pulled you into his chest, wrapping his arms around you.

“She’s a good person, Montgomery. You all are so mean sometimes.” You whispered.

“Hey Y/N, Monty just doesn’t want her influence around.” Marcus spoke up. You hadn’t seen him since Jeff’s funeral. He hadn’t said much to you. Then again, you two hadn’t ever said much to one another.

“Hey so we’re all gonna workout at the country club later today, you down?” Marcus asked Monty. Your boyfriend traced small circles on your back as you took in the group of people, arms crossed over your chest.

“Dinner with her family tonight, sorry.” Monty said in return. That hadn’t been officially planned, but he did have dinner with you and your parents most nights.

“You haven’t worked out with us in forever, man. It’s the only day that I can get all of you into the club at once.” Bryce continued to try and convince your boyfriend.

“My girl comes first, sorry.” Monty thought that was the end of the conversation

“She can come. You just said how she’s gained all this depression weight and it’s getting to be a problem and-” Bryce was going to talk further, but Monty lunged at him, making him fall to the ground before he could.

“If anything about her EVER leaves your mouth again I swear to God I’ll kill you.” He growled. You pulled Monty off of Bryce, tears already slipping down your cheeks.

“She just lost her damn brother, Jesus.” Jessica, who had been standing by her boyfriend, Justin had rushed to your side out of protectiveness.

“That’s not how it was I just-” you couldn’t even let him finish his excuse.

“Did those words leave your mouth?” You didn’t even look up at him. Jessica has wrapped her arms around you. The hall had gotten quieter. This had officially been made a scene after Monty lunged at Bryce.

“Look princess it didn’t-”

“Answer the question! Did you say my weight was a problem? Yes or No?” Your voice was raised and louder than it had been in a month.

“Yes, but it was just-” you shook your head, laughing to yourself.

“That’s all I needed to know. But, let me relieve you of this said problem.” You pulled your hair to one side. You unhooked the necklace you wore. The necklace that hadn’t left your neck in almost four months. His little promise 'ring on a string’ anniversary gift. When he wouldn’t take it back, you handed it to Zach.

“Make sure he takes this. It’s his decision what he wants to do with it. Maybe he was who every girl in this school warned me he was all along.” You said, turning in the other direction. Jessica followed you, wanting to show you support. Monty tried to walk after you. You had no idea what he was frantically saying. All you knew was that Jessica was yelling at him to get away and that you now felt officially alone in this world.

Rock Paper Scissors? (Clay Jensen, 13 reasons)

~the first imagine I’ve posted since I came back. Also my first Clay imagine! Thanks for the support. I love feedback!~

“Please?”

“No”

“Pretty please?”

“Hey- how about no?” You smiled at him, amused that he had gotten his hopes up at all. Clay slumped against your head board as you continued taking history notes, clearly a lot more concentrated on what you felt was the more important matter than he was.

“Okay, Okay. But you need to tell them within the next month. It’s really wrong to keep it from them if you ask me.” Clay replied, looking at you with very convincing eyes.

You and Clay had been together for what felt like always. He was your everything. As cliche as it sounds, nothing compared to movie nights with him, knowing a party was probably raging nearby, yet you were still wrapped in the pale, lanky boy’s arms.

You remembered when he thought he was too boring for you. You remembered feeling bad for him when he finally got the courage to ask if he was too boring for you. You’d reassured him that this wasn’t the case, and if only seemed to make your relationship stronger.

Clay and you probably wouldn’t have made it this far if you really didn’t want to. He had nightmares over Hannah’s death. You had started talking not long after the suicide, and he seemed okay at first, but things got weirder and weirder. After one large blowup, where you walked out of his house crying, he came after you, and promised an explanation would come in time. ‘I was in love with Hannah Baker, Y/N. But, I think she sent me you, really I do.’ He has pleaded with you. And you couldn’t have turned from him in that moment even if you’d wanted to.

You’d been inseparable since. And things really had fallen into place for the two of you. Most people didn’t talk marriage and kids with their high school partners, but you two did. People teased Clay saying ‘he would’ be the kid to marry his high school sweetheart. But it didn’t matter. You two were happy. A lot happier than most if not all of the people in your high school.

“What do you think they’ll say? We’re thrilled that you’re no longer going to the college we’ve been prepping you for since you were two years old, so you can go to school with your high school boyfriend? I think they might kill me.” You ran your fingers through your hair. You had to tell them, he was right about that. But would there ever be a good time to let them down? Maybe you were in search of something nonexistent.

“You accepted Stanford’s offer. They can’t be that mad that you turned down Yale. I mean, Stanford is an in state school. No out of state tuition to pay.” Clay pulled your frustrated body into his chest. He knew you were nervous, but he felt the longer you waited to say something, the more spur of the moment your parents would feel the decision was, and the more they’d resent him.

“Rock Paper Scissors?” You offered, sitting up and looking at your boyfriend. He laughed at the ridiculous notion.

“You’re telling me someone who got into Stanford is using Rock Paper Scissors as a decision making tactic? I’m shocked.” He looked at you for a solid ten seconds before you both broke out into light laughter.

“Alrighty then.” He sighed, preparing for the match. You giggled and smiled brightly at him.

“Scissors beats paper!” Clay soon yelled, leaping off the bed and throwing his fist in the air.

“You were too excited for that first of all. Second of all, how about 2 out of 3?” Clay looked at you as though you were speaking a foreign language. You two could be childish, but it was part of your DNA as a couple.

“Nope! They better know by the end of tonight!” He began stuffing everything into his backpack, preparing to leave you to face the music. There was a pregnant silence as he stopped in his tracks at your bedroom door.

“You don’t regret picking Stanford right?” You could tell Clay was afraid for you to answer honestly.

“Of course not. It’s Stanford, Clay. Plus I like the teaching program there more.” You closed your textbook. You were going to be a teacher, Clay was still looking at his options supposedly.

“Guess I’m just realizing that it’s not far fetched that a good portion of why you picked the school was to be with me.” He turned around, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

“Don’t give yourself so much credit, Jensen. I’ve always wanted to be a tree.” He laughed at your joke that seemingly made fun of the Stanford tree.

“Hey, that’s the band’s mascot. We’re the cardinals, if we’re honest.” His eyes laughed and danced with happiness, like they did a lot of the time when he was around you.

“Oh, well that might change things.” You said sarcastically. He tensed up for a moment before realizing you were joking.

“I love you.” He looked at you one more time. You blushed. He was the first and only guy you’d ever said ‘I love you’ to.

“I love you too. Now leave so you don’t see my parents kill me.” He grinned one more time, leaving you alone in your room. Even though it was going to be a pain in the ass getting your parents to accept that this wasn’t going to go their way, you were going to college, you were going to fucking Stanford with Clay. No one could ruin that for you.

I’m officially back.

I think. Id like to thank everyone who’s stayed when I completely ditched this blog, which I sincerely apologize for. But requests are open. I have a job now and work every day this weekend, but I never have more than 4 hours a shift so I could predict at least two writings going up this weekend if I get enough requests. Thank you so much again for staying and I’m so excited to get back into writing !

~it’s finally here! I like how it turned out. Please tell me what you think and as always, request! Love you all, thanks for the support~

First day back and you hadn’t even made it through the day, what a trooper you were. You’d managed to contain yourself enough to call your mom and ask her if you could spend the night at Jessica’s. She couldn’t contain her excitement, that you were finally going out and being a person again with someone other than Monty. Little did she know, everything was worse.

Jessica had ditched the rest of the day to be with you at her house. She’d even ditched her plans with Justin that night. But she said if he even so much as went to the same get together as Montgomery, she’d cut his balls off. You could tell she was trying not to have “I told you so” talk. She’d been one of the most vocal when it came to being anti- your relationship with Montgomery, in the beginning especially. She listed all of her cheer friends he’d hooked up with and never texted back. She’d mentioned on many occasions what a flirt he was. She’d even said that his anger problems should have been enough to keep you from dating the jock. But it only took mere weeks for you to be head over heels for the hothead. And no one could deny how happy he seemed to make you. Just like no one could deny that you brought out the good in him.

It was midnight. Jess was still up with Sheri. You were passed out on Sheri’s lap. They’d pretty much watched you cry yourself to sleep. Two girls that you probably wouldn’t have been all that close with had it not been for your relationship with Monty. You’d been acquaintances at best. They were apart of Jeff’s ‘friend group’, sure. But you two lead your lives separate enough to where you didn’t necessarily know all of the same people.

You’d wanted to invite Hannah, hell, you’d even wanted to see Skye when she texted you, reaching out. Jesus, shit got around fast. Then again, a lot of people had witnessed it for themselves. On that very public stage that was the main hallway. Bottom line was though, neither Jessica nor Sherri seemed to want Hannah there. Maybe that was what made Hannah think everyone hated her. You couldn’t blame her for that.

Out of no where, you were startled awake by Jessica raising her voice and her bedroom light being switched on.

“I swear to God I’ll get my dad. Get out of my house! All of you. Go on!” You opened your eyes slightly. You had a feeling you knew what was going on, but you didn’t want to believe it was happening.

“God damn it Jess. There’s no need for that. I heard him out. You guys should.” Justin whisper-yelled.

You rubbed the sleep out of your eyes and see Justin pleading with his girlfriend, while Monty stood behind him, his jaw clenched.

“Why the hell are you two breaking and entering?! And Jessica said you’re not even supposed to be with Montgomery.” Sheri whispered.

“There’s five of them!” Jessica pointed out her bedroom window. Standing on the roof right outside were Marcus, Zach, and Alex.

“Leave!” Sheri said, her tone normal, but not level the same time.

“No.” All five of them said at the same time, causing a booming echo.

“Leave before you wake up my brothers.” Jessica said firmly. She glanced towards the wall that she shared with one of her brothers, as his bedroom was next to hers.

“I’m not leaving before I talk to you.” Montgomery was being serious, no doubt. His eyes were full of pain and they were red. You couldn’t decide if he’d gotten high with the boys or if he’d actually been crying. But either way, you wanted nothing other than to deny him his wish.

“This is Jessica’s house. She doesn’t want you here. And neither do I.” You said sharply. You didn’t look straight at him, because you didn’t want him to see how many tears were already slipping down your cheeks. So you buried your head in Sheri’s lap again. She ran her hands up and down your back, trying to help level your breathing.

“I’ll throw you over my shoulder and drag you out of this damn house myself, Y/N.” Montgomery walked forward. Jessica pushed him back.

“No you fucking won’t.” You snapped, still not looking up at him.

“Oh yeah? Who’s gonna stop me? Twig one and twig two? I don’t think so.” Monty knelt down so he was face to face with you, since you still hadn’t moved from Sheri’s lap.

“I would say Jeff would kick your ass, but we all know why that’s not gonna work out, now don’t we?” There was a tension filled silence. Sheri wouldn’t let go of your hand as your breaths grew more and more uneven again.

“You know I didn’t mean it like that.” Monty finally mumbled. Yeah, you did know. And maybe it was selfish, but you said it so he’d hurt even more than he already was.

“I guess. But I still want you to leave.” You got up and stood next to Jessica, who had just finished fending off Justin’s who was trying to get back on her good side by embracing her.

“Look me in my eyes and say that.” Montgomery said. His tone was firm, like he knew you weren’t going to be able to do what he said. He was right. So you stayed silent.

“See, I know that after everything we’ve been through, you don’t wanna just throw me away like that. Let’s go.” He stood behind you. Everything he’d ever done for you crossed your mind in that moment. The times that you were sick and he’d fall asleep on the couch after picking up your prescription for you. The countless times he asked your mom if she needed any help with dinner, or if your dad and Jeff needed help with any labor work outside. 'If they’re happy with me, then they’ll continue to let me make you happy, Y/N.’ he’d said once. You’d told the girls about it, they found it unbelievable that Montgomery De la Cruz had said that to a girl.

You turned around slowly, looking up at him. You nodded, and he took your hand, heading for the bedroom door.

“I swear to God if you hurt her anymore than you already have I’ll do what Jeff would have done if he were here.” Jessica’s words truly came out in a growl.

“Davis, you’ve always hated us together. I get it, maybe I don’t deserve her. Hell, I know I don’t. But I’ve never hurt her before this. I didn’t mean to hurt her now. So don’t talk about things when you don’t know shit. As I recall, you haven’t really stopped by too much in the past few weeks, have you Jessica?” You had told Jessica not to stop by. You’d been a mess and you were really only comfortable with Monty seeing you in your state. She’d broken the rule a few times but not that many.

“Fuck you Monty. She told me not to.” Jessica moved as though she was going to hit Monty, but Justin stopped her.

“Well let me tell you something about Y/N, alright? It’s all in her eyes. She can say one thing and mean another and I can tell you what the fuck she’s actually thinking just by her eyes. That’s why she won’t look at me and say it. Because she knows she wants to hear me out.” Montgomery’s statement got no response from anyone else in the room. And with that, he took your hand again and lead you out of the bedroom door. No one stopped him. No one could find it in them to stop him.

You were silent. Still angry and upset, you didn’t know what you could say even if you wanted to speak.

“I love you.” He said once you were both seated in his jeep that was parked out front. You laughed a little.

“Do you, though?” She asked him. He threw his keys down on his dash in frustration.

“That’s a bullshit question, and you know it.” He grumbled, still staring at you, practically begging for eye contact.

“I love you too.” You mumbled back to him, staring at your hands that sat in your lap.

“I didn’t say it the way you think I did.” He said, now getting straight to the point. You couldn’t take it anymore, you turned and stared at him.

“What other ways can that be meant?” You scoffed. For the first time that night, the two of you made true eye contact.

“The boys asked why coach was going so easy on me missing practice and games. I said that he knew I was taking care of you. They asked if you were doing better. I said not really.” He said, still looking at you. He went to grab your hand, but you swatted his away. Apart of you wanted to grab his hand. Skin to skin contact with him was one of the only things that made you feel good automatically. It hadn’t gone away, you had to admit, even after what he said.

“And you responded with yeah, she’s sad so she’s eating a bunch of shit and gaining a ton of weight and if it continues she’s gonna have a problem.” You still stared at him.

“You don’t believe that.” He stated. You rolled your eyes.

“So now you know me better than I do?” He shook his head, laughing a little.

“Maybe. You know deep down I would never say that about you. I love you whether you’re two hundred pounds or one twenty, I don’t give a fuck. I just- I’ve seen the way you grab at your stomach while you look in the mirror. It’s an unhealthy dislike towards yourself, baby.” You winced at him calling you what he’d called you for the year you two had been dating. You couldn’t find it in you to tell him to stop though.

“I’ve gained fifteen pounds over the course of three weeks, that isn’t normal.” You squeaked out, tears flowing down your face now. You flinched as his arm hook around your waist, attempting to move you onto his lap. You eventually gave in begrudgingly.

“Love me, God damn it.” He whispered into your hair. You gave in a bit more, wrapping your arms around him as you continued to cry.

“You knew I didn’t say anything bad.” He kissed your temple as his fingers traced shapes on your shoulder blade.

“Maybe. It’s just-” he didn’t let you finish.

“It’s just that you wanted another excuse to be this sad still.” Your breath hitched. Fuck, he was right.

“It’s not normal to still feel this bad.” Your voice was hollow.

“Well, no matter how abnormal you are, I fucking love you. I changed a lot so I could at least try to be deserving of you, did you know that? I even watch my language around your parents.” You chuckled a little.

“Mom still complains about it.” You looked up at him.

“To my face.” You saw him smirk a little bit. You sighed deeply.

“I don’t care if you’re this sad for five more years. I will be here for you until you can little by little move on.” He moved your chin with his hand so you had to look at him.

“I’ll say it again, I fucking love you. I want to marry you. I want you to have my babies. And I want us to tell all kinds of stories about Jeff to our kids. Because he would have been the best damn uncle out there, yeah?” You nodded before burying your head in his chest, letting out a heart wrenching sob.

“We’ll get through this, alright? And if it takes you gaining extra weight or you watching the same movies over and over to get through it, then that’s how it’s gonna be, alright baby? Do you get it?” You nodded again, wrapping your arms around his neck, his arms settled at your waist as he rested his head in your neck. In a few minutes he’d give you back your 'ring on a string’. Although this time he didn’t want it on a chain. He wanted everyone to know that you and him were in it for the long haul, no matter how shocked they’d be.

Is finished!! Thank you for all of you that have requested it. I’m so glad it was enjoyable and I’m very happy with how part 2 turned out. I haven’t decided when I’m posting it though. I’m super tired rn and I’m going to the beach tomorrow with friends. I’m also going out of town with a friend on Saturday and then Sunday I’m going out of town AGAIN with a different friend. So if I get a minute this weekend I PROMISE I will post it. I love you all so much and thank you for the support! As always!!! Request!!!!!!!

Yikes. I guess I should have seen it coming seeing as this is a writing blog and people are critical of writing but it still stings. ‍♀️