You are not hurting anyone by expressing your disdain for romance or anything to do with it. Saying “I’m not interested in that kind of stuff,” “it’s just not for me,” or even just “I just don’t like it,” should be perfectly fine and acceptable and if someone gets twisted up over it then they just need to get over it. It is okay to express yourself. It should not be that big of a deal.
aro tumblr is the best place like you click on the aromantic tag and suddenly you’re transported to this magical realm where ppl know the word amatonormativity
Oh by the way pride month absolutely includes our asexual and aromantic friends. To all my ace and aro homies, you are valid and we love you! Exclusion has no place at pride.
Swinging the bat at the hornets nest by criticising fandom again but the fact that it is a given that any fanworks will be romance and shipping focused (and it IS, exhibit A being goddamn ao3 has the / tag type to list romantic relationships and another, &, for every other type of relationship ever, exhibit B being all the “fanfic tropes” are romance tropes common in romantic fanfic, i could go on) is so alienating as an aromantic person, especially as a romance repulsed person. I can understand romance being a fandom focus for fandoms of romantic media, but irrespective of what the fuck is going on in canon fandom is ALWAYS shipping-centred and its so isolating.
I made it quickly so I might add a few more questions later.
[id: Your Result: Pentacles. keywords: Stability, safety, money, nature, prosperity, health, long term, home. You don’t know where being aro will lead you, but you own it and make the best of your life anyway. You see a peaceful future, and I swear to you that you will get it eventually.]
people talk about gay coding villains all the time but never about aro coding villains and it’s honestly everywhere it’s like “oh this terrible guy cannot feel love and it makes them a horrible person”
and before someone tries to debunk this with “oh but theyre not actuallyaro theyre cant feel anykind of love theyre a psychopath” that’s like saying buffallo bill from silence of the lambs isnt a transphobic caricature because he’s not actuallya trans woman
also. “No don’t worry, this isn’t arophobic, it’s just saying mentally ill/neurodivergent people are monsters.” is NOT the argument you think it is. like yall understand why that isn’t better, right?
in addition to just being blatant ableism, it’s entirely ignoring that queerphobic stereotypes go hand in hand with ableist ones, because being gay/trans/aspec/etc is pathologized. “they have this orientation because they’re mentally ill, and mentally ill people are terrible” isn’t refuting anything, it’s literally the thing the creators were going for. the response to being grouped in with another minority shouldn’t be “oh i see, you meant to pick on them, not me, carry on.”
Acting like the presence of ableist stereotypes somehow precludes the presence of queerphobic ones is shitty to literally everyone involved.
the response to being grouped in with another minority shouldn’t be “oh i see, you meant to pick on them, not me, carry on.”
Please respect partnering aros who do not use or feel comfortable with queerplatonic terminology for their relationships. I personally find the terminology weirdly unsuited to the way I do relationships (even if it technically should be), but other people might have different reasons for not using it. I support people’s right to use it, but I don’t like it applied to me.
In addition, please respect aros who feel a disconnect or aversion to the concept of attraction, even tertiary attraction. We’ve made a lot of progress with respecting people’s boundaries around the word “love” and accepting the idea that it’s an individual person’s decision whether to call something love or not, but I see the language of tertiary attraction applied to people whether they like it or not. I don’t use tertiary attraction language for myself because it makes me incredibly uncomfortable to view my desires and preferences through the lens of attraction. Again, if the language helps you or applies to you, I respect that, but it doesn’t apply to me.
It irks me so much how much of the “aromantic pride” and “aro positivity” tags are filled with 1) a ton of generic pride posts that don’t explicitly mention aros
2) aro negativity?? I understand that we have hardships but don’t put it in positive and pride tags. Because it’s not showing positivity or pride
3) posts that do mention aros but very briefly or as an add on to asexuality
Bc i know for a fact we probably won’t b seeing a lot of posts Abt us:
Happy pride 2 aro lesbians and aro gays and aro mspecs nd 2 any non-sam aro and loveless aros and any other aroallos who feel like ur not seen nd only see aro pride when paired w ace. Ur all doing amazing I hope u have a great pride <:]
I think mantises should be associatiated with aromantic, like frogs. Proof: - green - this pun
[ID: Art in the style of Art Noveau of a praying mantis, in light green with darker colors for the tips of its claws, shown from the front in the center of the piece and surrounded by swirling decals in shades of green, which create a border, and outside that is bushy leaves and white roses on a light blue background. End ID.]
I’ve seen a lot of intersectional aromantic discussions this week (yay!), but not if you’re aromantic and disabled.
I’m aromantic and disabled. In one aspect, my disability is a relief as people stopped harassing me to pursue romance. That’s abeism saying disabled people shouldn’t perpetuate their genes and die out quicker. It’s also ableism saying alloromantic disabled people shouldn’t have full access to society. But, and this is a big but, society also expects romantic partners to look after disabled people for free so society doesn’t have to. As a disabled aromantic, I’m missing a huge support network, of a live in carer and an additional family. I can’t exchange romantic feelings for basic care because I don’t have those feelings to tender. Factor in the aro-phobia of living costs based on two people co-habiting (usually sharing a bed/room) and being unable to work and relying on state income - how am I supposed to afford a place to live?
Please look out for your aromantic and disabled friends. We don’t have the same social support network because society doesn’t want us. In society you’re expected to be productive with your labour, be it exploitation for wages or giving birth. I can’t do one and have no interest in the other. That found family trope you love so much in fiction? Apply it to aromantic people and disabled people in real life.
is this aromantic lovecore or just a meme? someone let me know /hj
[Image description: an overhead photo of a red crab on the sand. There is black text above and below the crab. Top text says, “to many, red is the color of love.” Bottom text says, “to me, it’s the color of the crab”. /END ID]
