#theres not really a winning condition
I’ve seen a lot of intersectional aromantic discussions this week (yay!), but not if you’re aromantic and disabled.
I’m aromantic and disabled. In one aspect, my disability is a relief as people stopped harassing me to pursue romance. That’s abeism saying disabled people shouldn’t perpetuate their genes and die out quicker. It’s also ableism saying alloromantic disabled people shouldn’t have full access to society. But, and this is a big but, society also expects romantic partners to look after disabled people for free so society doesn’t have to. As a disabled aromantic, I’m missing a huge support network, of a live in carer and an additional family. I can’t exchange romantic feelings for basic care because I don’t have those feelings to tender. Factor in the aro-phobia of living costs based on two people co-habiting (usually sharing a bed/room) and being unable to work and relying on state income - how am I supposed to afford a place to live?
Please look out for your aromantic and disabled friends. We don’t have the same social support network because society doesn’t want us. In society you’re expected to be productive with your labour, be it exploitation for wages or giving birth. I can’t do one and have no interest in the other. That found family trope you love so much in fiction? Apply it to aromantic people and disabled people in real life.
