Help! I’m Not Allowed To Use Racial Slurs!

Social Q’s, The New York Times,21 January 2021:

As a Christian, I find it hurtful when I hear the Lord’s name used as swear words. If I used sexist, racist, anti-Semitic or homophobic language as curse words, I might be garroted. So, it’s hard for me to understand why such swearing is acceptable when it comes to Christ. But the idea of confronting people about this makes me uneasy. Is there a better way to communicate my hurt? — DAINA

Dear Daina,

Perhaps we mere mortals are not meant to know why the all-powerful eternal being worshipped by you specifically is so incredibly pissy about the use of His name, being as He is all powerful and eternal and surely burdened with shit vastly more important than whether the kid behind the counter at Blockbuster mutters “Christ Almighty” under his breath when you pay for your rental in loose change. The Lord, as they say, moves in mysterious ways!

But to the crux (sorry!!!!!) of the matter: why are people allowed to do a cuss at Jesus, a cruel attack on a defenseless baby/the immortal Son of God and our Holy Redeemer and the Lamb of Vengeance who literally has the ability to damn humans to an eternity of unimaginable torment, but you can’t unleash a barrage of violent slurs on people whenever the mood strikes? How can it be that just anybody can string the words “god” and “damn” together, doing immeasurable harm to a helpless Supreme Creator who might, at any moment, begin unleashing a series of plagues upon the world to usher in Armageddon and put a final end to humanity as we know it like the good and loving sky-Parent He is, but you can’t verbally abuse people such that they fear for their safety and wellbeing?

I mean, where’s the justice in that? Nobody is allowed to use sexist, racist, anti-Semitic, or homophobic curse words these days without suffering horrible consequences, such as being invited to direct Lethal Weapon Five,while everyone is allowed to say mean things about your particular religion of choice, for example, authors are having their books ripped from the shelves of public schools if they even vaguely hint at the idea that people other than white, heterosexual, cisgender, Christian Americans exist. So your worldview definitely tracks with reality there!

Certainly what Jesus had in mind when He commanded us to love our neighbors was for good Christians such as yourself to release a battery of offensive slurs against our fellow community members in order to balance the scales of power, at last, in favor of the Almighty God The Creator of Heaven and Earth.

I can sense judgement day coming, but I sense no god, so, i’m just saying that i’m totally down to try and brave Armageddon with some bros. 

anyone under twelve, supernatural beings, and they who like women get in free

the rest have a 15 dollar fee

those unaccepting of minorities are prohibited, we will use you as food if the event strikes. 

circus crackers, mini oranges, iced tea (unsweet), and hawaiian punch will be provided

location: the abandoned cabin surrounded by the dead trees near the lake

time: when the antichrist arrives