#ateez angst reactions

LIVE

[masterlist in bio]
30 january 2020
a/n: i felt good about woo’s so pls at least read his,,,also members under the cut since this is so long oops

warning: implications of sex, vulgar language

s e o n g h w a ♡

he finds it funny, really
the fact that he’d spent so much time focusing on you and you only, had given up so much for you and you just took advantage of him like it was nothing
it’s hilarious to him to look back on how fucking stupid he’d been to ignore the feeling in his gut and try to wait it out in hopes of his suspicions being false
but of course, like everything else, it was too good to be true
he’s been waiting for you to come home for a good few hours now
you haven’t been answering your phone at all and god knows where you are at this hour
and this isn’t the first time either. but seonghwa doesn’t like being by himself, so he always goes back to the dorms during these situations. and you know that
but you don’t know this time he’s decided to wait, to see what’s really going on, if it’s really worth staying and trusting you
when he finally hears the lock of the door clicking, he’s up against the counter in the kitchen with his arms folded over his chest that’s moving heavily up and down
and it only gets worse when he hears not only you giggling, but also another voice he doesn’t recognize
he harshly knocks down a chair on his way into the living room, storming all the way to the man whose neck you’ve attached your lips to, grabbing him by the collar and swinging his fist into his jaw as hard as he can
kicking him a couple more times as he falls to the ground
you’re terrified of what seonghwa’s going to do to him or what he’s going to do to you
but there’s no point. he’s too much of a gentleman to ever lay a hand on you
so all he does is scream and shout at you about how he shouldn’t have stayed, how dumb he was to believe your lies, how he should have been able to see right through you the whole time
and he hopes you’re fucking happy with the douchebag bleeding on the floor and if you want to be with him so much take him and leave, your stuff will be outside in the morning
after you’re gone, it’s hard for him to think. maybe it’s because he’s tired
or he’s completely hopeless from losing the one thing that kept him sane
but is now causing the worst pain he never thought he’d feel

h o n g j o o n g ♡

he’s been too busy with work to notice how distant you’ve become the past few weeks
and maybe it’s his own fault this happened since he hasn’t made time for you
but he’s still hurt and heartbroken and it’s still not a good enough excuse to throw away everything he’s done for you
hongjoong told you he’d be home before you go to bed, but he finds himself caught up in work again, losing track of time
he curses at himself under his breath, haphazardly grabbing his things to get to you as quickly as possible
he wants to make it up to you, he really does
but the idea’s completely thrown out the window as he opens the door to find you on the couch with another man
he stumbles in shock, not sure what to do or say
all you do is give him a small look and stand up slowly, calmly beginning to speak as if you’ve been expecting this to happen
it’s not that hongjoong doesn’t want to hear your explanation, just that he physically can’t
his breathing and heartbeat are too fast to consider safe. his vision begins to blur, but he doesn’t know if it’s from tears or because he’s beginning to feel lightheaded
heloved you. he gave you everything he could for you and you didn’t care
he told you in the beginning time management would be difficult and if it was going to be a problem to talk to him
you stepped on his heart and spit on it like he means nothing to you
he doesn’t realize he’s been screaming or crying until his fist comes in contact with the wall. he also notices you haven’t said anything or tried to justify yourself at all
he shakily turns his head in your direction but your eyes are somewhere else, arms folded over your chest and an almost-guilty look on your face
and he looks at the boy he assumes is the one you’ve been with. he’s practically in the same stance as you, trying not to get caught up in everything
the room feels hot. too hot for hongjoong to stay
so he walks past you and begins to grab some things, thanking himself for never leaving too much at your place
he leaves without another word. he wanted to tell you how much he fucking hates you, but then he’d be lying through his teeth
you don’t deserve to be hated anyway, and he silently wishes you the best because all he’s every wanted is for you to be happy
and if he can’t give it to you, he’s more than satisfied to let you find something else to take his place

y u n h o ♡

maybe he should have listened to the guys all the times they’d told him they’d had a bad feeling about you from the beginning
or maybe he should have just put in a little bit more effort, giving you more than you’d ever wanted
but there’s no point in thinking about that now. it’s too late.
he’ll never be able to describe the feeling of walking in on the love of his life with their legs wrapped around another man’s waist
the man you said was nothing more than a coworker. the constant meet-ups for “work purposes” were clearly just quick fucks behind yunho’s back
he’s angry, sure. that’s a given
but he’s more confused and insecure and broken-down than anything
what did he do wrong? what does this man give you that he doesn’t? did you ever really love him?
tears are already streaming down his cheeks as he screams for the man to get the fuck out of his house
but as soon as he’s gone, yunho goes quiet except for the sobs that escape his throat
he wants to talk. to know what happened when. and he’s willing to give you another chance
he knows he shouldn’t. he doesn’t want to think about what the guys would say about this
but he loves you way too much to ever let you go like this
his feelings for you could rival that of someone who was genuinely obsessed. a stalker, if you were willing to go that far
he’s willing to do anything to keep you by his side. you two can move on together
but when you tell him there’s no moving on, there’s nothing the world has to offer the two of you anymore
he falls to the ground in pieces
he’s crying so hard he barely makes any noise
he can’t breathe. he’s shaking. he wants everything to stop
he begs and begs and begs for you to stay. he can’t live without you
yunho can barely hear your apology as you step around him and walk out in the direction of your new lover, leaving him on the floor alone with his demons
he’d spend the next nights wondering what he did wrong
what he could have done differently to have made you stay
his body is completely drained of energy. every night he limps to the bed, alone, to cry himself to sleep
ever so slightly hoping he doesn’t wake up

y e o s a n g ♡

yeosang is a very attentive man. he should have been able to pick up on all the little things that would have led to this situation
but you’re a very secretive person. good enough to keep it from him for however long this shit has been going on.
it hurts that he found out through a friend. he doesn’t know if it would have been better for him to see it directly, but he’s still glad he didn’t.
wooyoung had pulled him aside a few weeks ago to tell him that he’d seen you kissing someone he didn’t recognize. but yeosang didn’t want to believe it
so he waited it out and paid close attention to your actions. he can’t really tell what’s different, but it doesn’t add up nonetheless
and yeosang is not a confrontational person in the slightest
so when he comes to you with a simultaneously angry and terrified look on his face, you already know you’re in shit
he’s direct and straight to the point. not that you’d expect anything else from him
“are you seeing someone else?”
it doesn’t take a psychologist to recognize the way you tear your gaze away from him and try to hide the pure guilt on your face
you don’t answer. so he repeats his question, but harsher and louder and more aggressive.
“are you fucking cheating on me? fucking answer me, y/n!”
he’s already zoned you out by the time you start spitting apologies from your lips
he doesn’t understand what he did wrong
he took care of you
he dropped everything for you the second you called
he put you before everything
he’s been through absolute hell for you
but you really took that for granted
and the fact that you’ve had the audacity to tell him you love him? you’re a fucking liar
yeosang doesn’t hate many things, but liars definitely top the list
but he’s never really encountered liars like you. nobody’s ever gone that far to rip his heart out and stomp on it
so he doesn’t know what else to do other than run out of the apartment and let his legs carry him as far as they can take him
he doesn’t know where he’s going
he can’t tell if he’s crying or if the cold wind is making his eyes water
but as long as he can get as far away from you as he possibly can, it doesn’t really matter at the moment.

s a n ♡

though san is one of the members to fall the hardest, he’s attentive and mature enough to know when things aren’t going as well as they used to be
he’s noticed you’ve been a bit more distant lately
you’ve been on your phone a lot and have been staying out later
and more often you have excuses to not spend time with him, so of course he already has his suspicions
but he’s been terrified of saying or doing something in fear of being wrong and damaging your trust
until now, a little past two-thirty in the morning when you get a text from a name he’s noticed on your phone before
and you must have not been smart enough to change your passcode, he thinks as he opens the message to find pictures of you he’s never seen even though he’s the only one who should have
his blood begins to boil, but not as much as it would have had he not already figured you’ve been doing things behind his back
he quietly slips out of bed so as not to wake you up, but the action is completely pointless once he picks up your phone and hurls it at the farthest wall as hard as he possibly can, a loud grunt escaping his throat
your body shoots up, confused as to what san is making such noise for
but it clicks when you flick the light on and see san’s stance
his hands are balled into fists so tight his knuckles are white, his face red and scrunched up in anger
there are darkness and betrayal clear in his eyes, almost making you scared of what he’s going to do
there’s a lot of things he wants to do, but all he can is yell and let his emotions out
how he shouldn’t have let this played out so long
how he believed you when you told him you loved him and no one else
he screams for you to get out, but the only direction you move in is towards him in an attempt to convince him to let you stay
all you did was make it worse. you don’t deserve to stay
he picks up the framed picture of the two of you and throws it the same way he did your phone, finally causing you to leave
he doesn’t care if you don’t have your stuff or if he’s sending you on your own in the middle of the night. you don’t matter to him now
you could get hit by a car for all he cares, and he’d think you deserved it
all that matters is that he’s finally gotten everything taken care of and never has to see you again

m i n g i ♡

unless there’s been a fight between the two of you, it’s rare that mingi’s in a bad mood when you’re around him, even if he’s had the literal shittiest day in all of human history
you’re the first person he goes to when he needs someone to lean on or listen to him rant about everything on his mind
you don’t even have to do anything to make him feel better. just the thought of you makes his heart beat faster with pure love and gratefulness that he found you
so it’s really unexpected when you, the sole person he’s willing to give up his life for, do the exact opposite of what you normally do
today wasn’t a particularly stressful one, but he’s still dying to lie in your arms and listen to the soft thumping of your heart right now
he goes to make his way to your shared bedroom, already walking a bit slowly from being so worn out from practice
but all of his movements cease–including his breathing and probably his heartbeat, too–when he takes his first steps into the hallway
there you are, pinned up against the wall by somebody he recognizes to be “just a friend” from a while back
he notices how you scramble away from your partner when you realize he’s standing there, so you do know that what you’re doing is wrong
so why are you still doing it?
he has so many emotions right now he doesn’t even know how he’s feeling
but it absolutely tears him up inside
did you ever really love him? was he just a toy to you?
he’s useless. of course it was too good to be true. nobody could ever love him. he was stupid to think that you shared the same feelings he had for you
the other man’s already left the house by now. i’ll stop by later, he said. it just made the situation worse.
he’s rambling and he’s crying and he’s bumping into things trying to back away from you
don’t fucking touch him. he wants to say it. he tries, but the words get caught between sobs in his throat
it feels almost as if he’s dreaming. it’s what he wants to believe, anyway. so he doesn’t bother stopping you when you wrap your arms around his body and pull his head into your chest, dropping to your knees on the floor where he sits now
he lets you cradle him even though he knows you shouldn’t. he’s so, so confused.
it’s a hard debate in his head, whether or not to leave
he loves you way too much to ever even think of letting you go
maybe, he thinks, there’s a solution. everyone deserves a second chance, right…?

w o o y o u n g ♡

wooyoung is someone who falls in love easily. and when he does, the feelings are extremely strong to where it takes a lot to let go
he forgives and forgives because he loves you so much and he’s given you his entire soul to take care of
but never has he expected you’d crush it just like that
a few hours ago, he texted you to let you know he’s coming home early
he didn’t get a reply, so he assumed you were busy or simply taking a nap
god, how he wishes that were the case
he gently closes the door and sets his bags down before padding to the bedroom, trying to be quiet just in case you’re asleep
it’s only now that he hears sounds that definitely don’t sound like snores
sounds that definitely aren’t coming from you
the feeling of his heartbeat pounding against his ribcage is almost terrifying when met with his hands shaking without rhythm
he prays you’re just watching a video and you’re by yourself and he can just walk in and take care of you
but when he opens the door, he’s greeted with the sight of you on your knees with hands that aren’t his in your hair
he’s flooded with so many emotions—anger, fear, heartbreak—that he doesn’t even notice your partner scrambling to pull his pants up or you walking closer with your hands out, struggling to find an explanation
tears completely blur his vision as he tries to back away from you, not yet knowing what to say or do
but his mind takes over and his voice gets loud, slamming his fist against the doorframe, screaming for the two of you to get out and never come back
he screams and punches his fist against the wall, not caring if you can hear from outside and not stopping until blood is visibly dripping from his knuckles down his forearm
he’s angry at himself for not being so naïve, angry at you for taking advantage of him, angry at god for allowing something so terrible to happen to him
and the anger fizzles into sorrow, and the sorrow fizzes into hopelessness
and all he can do from here is curl against the wall and cry until his head pounds at the tempo of his broken heart

j o n g h o ♡

it all began when you started calling someone’s name in your sleep. a name that wasn’t jongho’s.
he didn’t know who he assumed it to be, but he tried not to think too much of it
he should have, though
the last time he hears you call that name, you’re not asleep
you’re lying on the couch, yes, but you’re just as awake as he is
his first reaction is shocked. this was not what he expected to come home to. hell, he didn’t even know you were gonna be here, let alone cheat on him
his second reaction is angry. he’s fucking pissed at the person whose was sitting between your legs moments ago, a place jongho thought was reserved for him and him only. who is he to think he has the same rights?
then he’s pissed at you. who the fuck do you think you are, letting some stranger go down on you on the same couch you sat with your boyfriend just last night, telling him you loved him?
then he’s pissed at himself. he should have known better. he didn’t see any signs, but he should have picked up on them. they had to have been there
the way his brows furrow and his nose scrunches puts a terrifying expression on his face. you’ve never seen him like this, and it was probably for the best
he tells the man simply to get the fuck out. when he doesn’t do it quick enough, jongho grabs him up by the collar and knocks his fist square into his jaw before practically throwing him out the door and slamming it shut hard enough for a nearby picture to fall off of the wall
his third reaction is denial. he’s shaking when he turns back around to you. he begs you to tell him it’s all a dream. tell him it’s just some sick prank and none of this ever really happened and everything can go back to how it was yesterday
it breaks your heart to see the rivers already streaming endlessly down his cheeks
his last sliver of hope disappears, however, when you only respond with apologies. you can’t even think of an excuse to give him. he would find that funny if he weren’t in this current situation
his final reaction his heartbreak. there’s no going back. how long has this been going on? he wonders. but he doesn’t bother to ask
he turns just enough to be able to punch the wall hard enough to leave a hole before plodding past you to the bedroom, not even sparing a glance at you
“i want all your shit out of here by the time i wake up.” it’s not a suggestion, even with the lack of authority in his voice. he sounds so drained, so helpless, so broken inside.
he doesn’t know why he’s lying in bed. he’s not tired. he can’t sleep
all it does is remind him of you. but it’s a good place to cry, he supposes. locked out from the world. just him, himself, and he. nobody else.
especially not you

@kpoptionate

Thu, 30 Jan 2020 16:00:49