#balamb
((The flashback part in italics is most effective whilst listening to ‘Fragments of Memories’ from the FFVIII OST :P
I listened to it as I was writing.))
Seifer becomes aware that the music has stopped and, now leaning forwards with his arms resting on his thighs, he looks up to see the now nervous waitress hesitantly taking the empty glasses. He tries to catch her eye but when he comes close, she self-consciously averts hers, so he gives up.
(The world’s my oyster.) Seifer happily stands up from leaning his crossed arms on the stone wall, looking down on the port and turns to look at Fujin and Raijin, who are standing patiently next to the shop. He has realised, watching Garden flying overhead, that you don’t have to live life by just one dream. He still believes in following his dreams, but he knows now that even if you commit yourself to one and live your life as you have imagined, there is still the possibility that things won’t turn out the way you wanted them to. Of course, things hadn’t turned out at all how he’d expected. But there was no going back; he had to see it through to whatever end and, in the end, he had thought it was exactly that. But he realises now how wrong he was. He has his whole life ahead of him still – a fresh start, where he is free to dream another dream. “Right men, the Disciplinary Committee is moving out”, Seifer commands, his left arm straight out to the side, pointing to the train station. “Our next destination: Deling City.”
“Yo, Seifer, you want another drink? It’s on me, ya know!” Raijin says enthusiastically, attempting to make Seifer feel better. Instead, it makes him feel worse. Of course, Seifer is not a SeeD, neither does he have any other form of income other than that which he finds or takes from monsters. The knight is almost flat broke and his companions know it. (I will not be pitied! Especially not by you two…) He had chosen Deling for various reasons, but mainly because it’s big and presumably full of opportunities for his ‘new life’. He hadn’t been wrong; the city is thriving, even without a current President. However, the Galbadian people resent the manipulation and oppression they were put under by the sorceress and, worst of all, Seifer’s prominent position at her ceremony has seemingly not been forgotten.
He places both of his gloved palms firmly down on the table top and gets to his feet. The waitress takes a step backwards; a reflex that Seifer notices, and annoys him further and gives him an uncomfortable pain in his stomach. (I feel sick. Am I that repulsive?) “Knock yourselves out”, he says to Fujin and Raijin. “I’m leaving.” Raijin hesitantly stands to let Seifer move past him; his mouth half open. “S-Seifer, we’re coming too, ya know!” Fujin raises a hand to her face, understanding Raijin’s feelings but understanding Seifer’s too. Seifer stops and raises a hand to Raijin’s chest in the universal ‘stop’ sign. “I want to be alone.” He turns and starts to walk away. “You kids have fun.”
“Seifer, stop that!” says the man as he struggles with two large suitcases. “Cry-ba-by, Cry-ba-by!” The blonde boy continues to tug at the younger boy’s hair. “Waah…waah! M-m-Matwyn!!!” the younger boy wails, tears running down his cheeks as he weakly tries to force Seifer’s hands away. It’s pouring with rain on this grey, November morning. The boys continue to struggle and make noise as they shelter on the stone porch, underneath the pillar supported roof, but even Zell’s cries are muffled by the rain that is dancing off the building, the foliage and the car. Cid, dressed in an over-sized raincoat darts back from the car to fetch more luggage from the porch and lets out an exasperated sigh at the boys, shaking his head. (He never does listen to me…)“Boys, please…” Seifer turns his head, still not letting go and sticks out his tongue. “I’m not a boy!”, he says stubbornly. Cid raises a hand to his face, sighing once more. “Oh no? Well what are you then, Seifer? A girl?” Zell forgets his problem for a moment and giggles. Seifer frowns, letting it sink in and then punches Zell in the arm, who starts to cry again. “Waaaah…Matwyn!” Cid opens his mouth to speak, but stops as a hand reaches down and softly touches Seifer’s shoulder. Zell immediately stops crying and scurries to hug onto the woman’s leg. Seifer turns and looks up timidly at the slender figure of Matron, dressed in black. He stands there, head lowered to the ground as Edea quickly comforts Zell, who has already recovered anyway, just at the sight of her. After ushering him back inside the stone house, she steps back to Seifer. He doesn’t hear her approaching over the sound of the torrential rain, but sees her elegant, black shoed feet and the bottom of her black dress appear in front of his lowered gaze. He looks up timidly as she squats down in front of him; reaching out to his grey duffel coat and starting to fasten up the toggles. “Seifer, you really shouldn’t pick on Zell like that. You won’t win any friends that way, you know?” she says, softly. “I-I don’t want to be his friend! I don’t need friends…not when I have Matron…” Seifer pouts. “But dear, you’re going away, you know that.” He lowers his eyes again, which are red and are starting to fill with tears. “You want to be a man, don’t you?” At that he looks up into her face and nods determinedly. “Then you should go and become one, my dear. You can’t stay here for ever.” He sniffs. “B-but why aren’t you coming too?” Edea lets out a calm sigh as she adjusts Seifer’s red scarf. “You’ll understand one day… It’s like I told you last night; you have to leave me here so you will be safe.” The teary eyed Seifer scrunches up his nose in an attempt to stop the tears and clenches his small fists. “B-but I don’t want to leave you. I don’t want to be a boy anymore, Matron. I’ll protect you…I-I…I’ll be your knight…l-like in the stories…” he says, before bursting into tears and Edea smiles sadly and pulls him gently into a hug. “I know, my dear… But you have to go and become a man before you can become a knight. Do you think you can do that…for me?”…
Cid, who has just helped Zell into the back of the fully laden car, shouts out through the crashing rain. “Edea, Edea! Do you know where Squall is?” After a pause, she replies, still holding Seifer. “He…might be down on the beach.” Cid places a hand on his hip and nods knowingly. “I’ll fetch him”, he says calmly as he walks around the building in the direction of the beach, where the grey waves are furiously crashing up on the nearby rocks and the lighthouse’s beam is shining through the fog; guiding the blind ships on their way…
(I can do it, Matron. I’ll become a man. I’ll protect you.)
[To be continued…]
