mistaken.

chaewonrk​:  

   for @haknyeonrk. ✨

chaewon wasn’t really paying all that much attention to where she was sitting in the canteen. did it matter? not to her. she might’ve been a new trainee, but she wasn’t afraid to talk to people. she simply chose not to most of the time. today, however, she was feeling social. once she’d quenched her thirst with a long drink of water, chaewon finally took a look at the others at her table. there was only one person of interest to her – a guy. he was good looking and chaewon swore she knew his face from somewhere, so she assumed he had to be a fellow trainee. maybe he’d even been cast after her, sometime in the last couple of weeks? she hadn’t heard about any audition opportunities though. maybe he was riding on nepotism.

“hey,” chaewon tossed her hair over her shoulder with a smile. she played with her food with the hand that wasn’t propping up her chin to look at the boy across the table. “i’m park chaewon. i just got signed here a couple of weeks ago.” the conversation was still a secondary priority to her meal. she took a second to take a bite, turning her focus away from the guy momentarily. “mm. what about you, hm?” 

haknyeon kind of understands the reason as to why most don’t sit next to him at lunch. despite his usually friendly nature, there’ll probably always be a line between debuted idols and trainees, especially newer ones. at some point, he’d gotten used to the lunches alone when his friends and the other members weren’t around, but to say that he enjoyed the silence would’ve definitely been false.

poking his food, he fiddles with it ever so slightly until he realizes that a girl had decided to sit with him. he blinks and looks up at her, mostly in surprise. he hadn’t seen her before –– and is sure that she’s a newer trainee. how bold! he thinks. his suspicions are confirmed when she introduces himself, though through her words, it’s a little bit more than evident that she probably doesn’t even know who he is. if even the trainees didn’t know who he was, it was probably a sign that he probably has to work harder.

he musters up a smile, and replies, “i’m ju haknyeon. i got signed a couple of years back,” he says, “and debuted a year ago in per_se,” he adds after a moment. he lets out an embarrassed laugh. “i should probably work harder to get more recognized huh?”

• MATERIAL GIRL W/ CHAEWONRK     ━━━━        ⁺ ♔  

some days jieqiong loved being the muse of a shopping mall. other days, she could only expect the worst. ( this was after sipping at least 3 expressos and trying to wolf down an advil or two as her other fellow models groaned in their makeup chairs )

but of course, her job isn’t all bad. in fact, if jieqiong was being completely honest, most days she hardly felt any ills against her job. it was, of course, the people that made most of her days oh-so hard to get through. sometimes, those days were just so hard to get through that even the clothes she would be bribed with by the end of her shoots were hardly enough to compensate for the 5-hour headache she was nursing by the end of it. 

but that was sometimes.

most days, jieqiong would nod and smile, filling her arms full of as many free garments she could carry without looking like a complete lunatic, before booking it the fuck out of that crazy hellhole before the photographer could even yell at her for more re-takes. she’d go home, gush to chaewon about how much of a hell the day had been – do a pseudo-fashion show and call it a day.

and then the process would repeat again the next day.

maybe these were the times she liked the most. as the day loses its shine and the evening smothers the seoul skyline with its oranges and deep maroons ; painting the sky in the moody afterglow of a heavy day. 

she pushes in the pin code of their apartment, uncerimoniously dropping the garment bags near the entranceway before trudging in on the look out for her roommate. “chaewon-ah ~ i’m home, you won’t believe the things i was given today. are you ready for a little one-two step down our catwalk?”

⁺  ♔       ━━     STARBRIGHT OPEN CASTING EVENT .

being here brings her a sense of deja vu. 

if jieqiong didn’t know any better, she could feel the familiarity warming her veins, giving her whiplash as she enters the park hyatt hotel in hopes of being one of the lucky ones chosen all over again. she had been in this exact headspace five years ago. 

she had been one of the lucky ones.

now, five years later – jieqiong wondered if she would still be just as lucky. 

jieqiong can’t say she isn’t nervous  – who wouldn’t be in this situation – a trait jieqiong hates to see upon herself. it was why, the second before they had walked in here – she had promised herself that any doubts she had would be left at the front and no where near the casting room. it’s why, with an extra squeeze of chaewon’s hand, she pulls the other one beside her as they waltz toward their destinies.

the application process was easy enough and while embarrassing at how short hers was in comparison to the many talented individuals she was sure were flocking to the site at this very moment; she passed it off with a grin. whether they sought her qualities poor or not was up to them. if anything, jieqiong promised she would dazzle them in the interview portion.

( this is one thing she could hope for )

if not then, it would be now.

while jieqiong didn’t have much to boost her resume, she did have one thing going for her:

unfortunately, she only hoped that one thing wouldn’t also bite her in the ass.

                                   ━━━━━━━━━━━     

the moment her name was called, she had spared one look at chaewon, hoping the sight of the other’s smile would give her the boost she needed, before departing for the room. 

the sight of it was all the same – almost to a fault that it brought back all the memories of her first audition five years ago. whether or not it brought it a streak of fright was something jieqiong wasn’t ready to dissect right now. she had to get her head in the game, as troy bolton had so eloquently put it.

thankfully this audition didn’t require any on the spot skill showcase – without proper preparation, jieqiong was sure she wouldn’t have passed the first stage. it is with this insight, jieqiong was able to confidently walk into the room with the brightest smile on her face. an introduction was needed and it was one jieqiong had rehearsed many, many, many times before.

she stops just before the table of panelists, her grin not one falling from it’s delicate curve along her face. she bows her head politely before giving each of the members of the panel a gentle blink of acknowledgment. “hello, my name is zhou jieqiong. i’m twenty one years old and from yangshuo, guilin, china.” the rehearsed drawl falls from her lips as eloquently as possible, her hands placed at her side as she speaks with practiced ease. it’s the speech she’s spoken for the last five years. and although her korean is still as heavily accented as it had been in the past, she thinks it at least sounds better now.

they can, at least, understand her better now.

WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE AN IDOL?

“i came to korea five years ago after being scouted by a talent agency. when i got scouted, i dropped everything because i thought this was my chance. but just last year we parted ways over artistic differences.” she speaks carefully, not wanting to spill her whole life story to these people but giving them a small glimpse was okay, enough, right? “ever since i was a little girl, i’ve been into this and that – we didn’t really have enough money so my parents couldn’t afford to keep me in lessons long. but seeing performances as a child through famous artists has always been something i wanted to feel and do. i want to be applauded and liked and be that idol for people.”

WHAT IS THE BIGGEST OBSTACLE YOU’VE HAD TO OVERCOME?

she’s had many obstacles – but one that jieqiong knows was the most impactful was: “coming to korea was probably my biggest obstacle. i had to leave my family in china and haven’t seen them since because money is tight right now. uprooting my whole life to chase this dream of mine was hard, and at first, i felt myself giving up and not seeing any progress really hurt my spirit. but now, i’ve been here for so long that i feel like i would just disappoint myself if i didn’t see this until the very end.”

if jieqiong had a choice, she’d never leave.

this was her now or never.

whether or not they felt that from her, jieqiong could only pray it came across.

chaewonrk​:

grateful.

“thank you so much!” chaewon’s cheeks immediately flush red when wendy invites her to actually sit with her. a meal with a member of her favourite girl group … yeah, maybe getting into nova over royal or kt was fate. never one to turn down an opportunity, and feeling much more confident because of their former meetings and after meeting sunmi, chaewon slides into place opposite wendy. “ah, i’d love to, thank you.”

“it went well! i suppose they were nice … actually, they didn’t say anything. i just walked in, did my thing and left. they only spoke to me when they offered me the contract. it was the, uh, star bright auditions from this year. they usually hold them every couple of years, i think.” she’d love to have been cast through some public, extravagant method like wendy on her season of the mgas, but it was probably better that it happened the way that it did. chaewon can guess that she’d probably have been edited into some sort of villain on the show if she had gone on it. “i performed a routine i choreographed to a little mix song a while back, when i was teaching a dance class! and i sang with it.”

Wendy nods as she watches Chaewon get settled across her. She rarely gets to meet the newer trainees, much less those who have been her students. The last time she met a trainee, he had scolded her to cockblocking his meeting with Luxe. He was lucky Wendy had been amused. She nods as she pays attention to Chaewon’s audition story. At least it hadn’t been as public in nature as the MGAs. “I’m glad you impressed them enough to see something in you,” Wendy says with a smile. “Those casting directors are hard to please.” 

“Sometimes I envy those who got scouted privately,” she says with a laugh. “At least there aren’t expectations or presumptions of your character.” Honestly, she was lucky that she had only been edited badly for a short while not to affect her votes in the MGAs or her place in SN Project. Though she was amused at her editing in MGA5, which she supposes was warranted. “How has training been for you so far?” Wendy asks, redirecting the attention to Chaewon. “I get that everything can get overwhelming, but you’ll eventually get used to it.” 

chaewonrk:

grateful.

     for @rkwendy. ✨

as intimidated as chaewon is by the and*roma members, she does want to see gyeoul again. chaewon doesn’t really believe in fate, but she doesn’t exactly think it’s totally bullshit either. she believes in luck, and she believes in paths. like, if chaewon’s parents were still around, she’d probably still be living in london. she might’ve gone onto a singing show like the x factor, or maybe the producers her mother knew would’ve gotten her a role on the west end. that’s one path. if she hadn’t made friends with naeun in high school, she might have given up on performing altogether. 

and, if she hadn’t gone to gyeoul’s singing class at the samsung speak up event, she might not have written down and*roma as one of her musical inspirations on her audition form. if she hadn’t, nova might not have taken a second look at her.

( unlikely, she knows, but she thinks that her listing and*roma on the form basically said that nova was her third choice of company, even if she didn’t realise it at the time. )

chaewon tentatively approaches wendy in the nova canteen, clutching her can of coffee in both hands.

“um, hi,” she says, lips stretched into a thin smile. “i … don’t know if you still remember me,” she’d remembered her before, and chaewon had been so impressed by it. “but i got signed to nova entertainment last month.”

Rest is welcome to Wendy, especially now that her final semester in university is starting. It’s almost weird to be thinking of today as her “last first day of school” in a long time. She never thought this day would come, but here it is. It’s going to be sad to say goodbye, but she’ll cross that bridge when she gets there. She finally gets back to Nova Entertainment, and the first thing she does is head to the cafeteria. She has not eaten since breakfast, so Manager Siwan will have to stop judging her for today.

She looks up when she sees someone approach her. Wendy remembers Chaewon from both the speak up classes and their impromptu meetup. The last time they talked, Chaewon didn’t seem to be associated with the company. Perhaps it happened sometime after that? 

“Congratulations and welcome to Nova, Chaewon!” She says with a smile. “Come and sit with me, if you’re not busy doing anything else.” 

Wendy nods. “How did the audition go? Were they nice to you?” She asks. She’s genuinely curious how all the newcomers made it to the company. “What did you do?”  

blinded by the stars.

chaewonrk​:

chaewon laughs uneasily in agreement. she hasn’t had any interaction with hyun bin since the day of her audition, but it would be just her luck to end up body slamming him. would that be more or less embarrassing than her current situation? probably more, but only by a tiny little bit.

sunmi’s smile is comforting, and as nervous as chaewon is, she mirrors the other’s expression. “i’m sure i will. i don’t mind coaches being tough, i …” sunmi doesn’t need to hear about her life story or the decade of intense ballet lessons, days and days spent with weights tied to her feet during training drills. chaewon shrugs her shoulders. it’s been a long time since she was in that nasty, competitive environment, but she doesn’t think that nova could be any tougher than the years she spent growing up in dance classes. “i’m used to it.”

“it’s lunch time, actually,” chaewon admits, cheeks flushing red. “i wasn’t running because i was late or anything, i just always move fast.” she lies. the exact opposite is true. usually during her free time ( and yes, lunch time equals free time ), chaewon moves as lethargically as she can get away with, unless she’s actively seeking to get on her feet. zooming through the halls to get the best pick of what the canteen had to offer is believable though.

she’s just about fully recovered when sunmi offers her her help. chaewon’s jaw hits the floor, and she quickly claps her hands over her mouth. she stammers behind her hands for a second or two before she slowly lowers them, willing the colour to drain from her face. “i … i couldn’t ask you to do that. i mean, i appreciate the offer, but, um, i couldn’t take you away from your schedules. really, but thank you,” a beat passes. chaewon swallows the lump forming in her throat. “or … if you just meant you’d show me the way to the canteen, that would be … nice.” god, how embarrassing. chaewon wishes the ground would just crack open on the spot and swallow her up. “i’m sorry for all this, i’m actually a really big fan of and*roma. i never thought the first time i’d meet you would be like this.”

sunmi quirks her brow in interest. “oh are you? what, were you running drills before?” she chuckles. “i used to be a gymnast before i moved to korea when i was 20. and because of the gap years between gymnastics and training, i felt it kick my ass.” she didn’t miss waking up early for anything. her body did bounce into shape quickly. especially because her body loves to run on little sleep. she doesn’t understand it but at least her body remembered.

ah so she’s just naturally zooming everywhere. hilariously enough, it reminds her of a hamster. she hums. “is that so?” though she can relate. it took her forever to unlearn the speed walking that new yorkers were so accustomed to. otherwise she’d feel herself growing frustrated with the slow pace that everyone walked. “you sure you’re not rushing to nab some sponge cake before they run out?” she teases.

it’s the clap of skin that catches sunmi’s attention. her eyes flicker at the other, quirking a brow. she had her hands clasped over her mouth. she seemed to be fully flustered once more. sunmi didn’t have much going on. she didn’t think showing the newbie around would take up that much time. though it was clear that she had a complete different perception of it. sunmi definitely wasn’t famous enough to have people assume her time was precious or anything.

“i wouldn’t mind showing you anywhere you needed to go,” she assures. she was really kind. especially confessing that she was a fan of and*roma. “thank you!” it was a little surprising. their concepts were….questionable. but it was nice to have a fan regardless of it. “there’s nothing to be sorry for, i promise.” she didn’t want her feeling uncomfortable.

“what’s your name? i didn’t quite catch it.”

.firsts

chaewonrk·:

chaewon shakes her head. “no way, plus, who’s even asking if you have or not?” she insists. “i mean, apart from this conversation, obviously. really, it just sucked. thinking about it makes me want to …” she scrunches up her face in disgust and points a finger into her mouth. she holds herself back from making the noises to match. she’s playing it up a little. “very weird memories. but, i guess most people probably find it weird the first couple of times.” 

“that’s dumb,” she says flatly, leaning back on her hands to get a proper look at him. “unattractive people get laid all the time too, so even if that was your problem – which it’s not – then you don’t have anything to worry about.” she’s not the most skilled in being reassuring. any of her friends can vouch for that. chaewon’s advice and comfort are almost always sincere, but tend to come packaged messily. still, she delivers her points confidently, a smug smile spreading across her face. she nudges him with her foot as she uncrosses her legs. “earth to eric, hello?” she teases, waving a finger in front of his face. “i think i know what your problem actually is. you’re oblivious.” chaewon leans back again, raising an eyebrow at him as she rolls her eyes. “how many people have you left hanging like this?” she’s messing with him now, her voice whiny as she pouts. chaewon can’t help laughing, mostly with him, but a little bit at him. “stupid. i’m trying to right now, if you want.”

eric snorts, “you’d be surprised how often it comes up when people are drunk at parties.” there’s been quite a few times at parties where the topic of first kisses has come up and eric’s had to admit he’s never had his first kiss. people usually don’t believe him, or call him cute and coo at him like he’s a baby (not that he really minds being babied, in all honesty). “i feel like i’d rather have a bad first kiss than no first kiss.” he says with a pout. 

he’s about to ask if chaewon thinks he’sunattractive, but closes his mouth, a flush spreading over his cheek as she says that isn’t his problem. something about her thinking he’s not unattractive makes his stomach do nervous flips. however, when she says his problem is obliviousness, he frowns. does she mean that.. he’s had the chance and completely not noticed it, or something else? because that sounds rather far fetched to her. “left hanging..?” he murmurs in confusion, before it slowly dawns on him what she could be saying. as she confirms his suspicions his lips part in a surprised ‘o’. 

she’s trying to kiss him? the blush on his cheeks spreads right to the tips of his ears and his eyes widen, before a nervous giggle escapes him and he bites back a grin. “really? you’d kissme?”it sounds crazy, someone as beautiful as chaewon being down to kiss him. but, since it was so blatantly said, he assumes she’s not joking around, so he nods eagerly. “yes. i definitely want.”

splash. 

chaewonrk·:

“i’m not worrying, believe me,” chaewon responds, cheekily flipping her hair over her shoulder. he’s being sweet, she thinks, so she probably shouldn’t be so mean to him. she pouts back at his grin, though her lips quickly fall back into neutral, the hint of a smirk pulling at one corner of her mouth. “uh, no. i don’t think so. i haven’t cycled a bike since i was a kid. i’ll sit on your handlebars, though.” then he can push the peddles for her on a bike too. she doesn’t intend on leaving all the work to him though – she’ll join back in after a few minutes break. 

or, she would have done, if she hadn’t fallen into the water like an idiot. 

eric landing in the water almost on top of her head does nothing but elicit a scream from chaewon, as it splashes over her head. she’s submerged briefly for a second time, but she manages to keep a hold onto the side of the boat. as eric laughs, chaewon scoughs (that’s a scoff and a cough). she gently kicks him, letting out a wordless whine.

“this isn’t funny! eric, this isn’t funny!” she’s yelling in english, and hits her hand off the side of the boat. chaewon gets a better grip on the side of the boat and tries to pull herself up, but she doesn’t have quite enough upper body strength to do so. she looks at him, a fierce determination in her eyes, fueled purely by the desire to get the fuck out of the water. “hoist me up.” she shakes her legs around in the water to demonstrate where she wants him to lift her from. she’s not sure if it’ll work partially underwater, but it might.

the thought of riding around with chaewon on his handlebars doesn’t sound too bad, to be honest. in fact he can’t help but smile at the thought. maybe he’ll take her out somewhere and transport them via bike soon, just so he can have her ride on his handlebars - just so they can say they’ve done it. “i get it, make me do all the work, huh?” he responds, laughing, even though he doesn’t mind it.

all those thoughts, however, are pushed from his mind once he’s in the water. he notices how cold it is almost instantly, giving a little choked scream to emphasise just how cold. he only half agrees with chaewon that this ‘isn’t funny’ because to him it’s kind of hilarious, seeing her with her hair plastered to her head, bobbing up and down in the water. though pretty soon the hilarity of it wears off, and he’s just wet, cold, and slowly realising they’re both wearing white, which is now see through. 

he stops laughing when she hits her head, frowning in concern. “okay! okay! stop wriggling!” he responds, also in english, defaulting to the easier language. he moves a little closer to her, then pauses to try and figure out how to lift her up, the thought of possibly having to shove her by her butt up into the boat making him flush from the apples of his cheeks to the tips of his ears. he eventually grabs the boat with one hand and leans as far down as possible, ducking slightly under the water to wrap his other arm around her. 

he’s still blushing as he holds onto her, holding himself steady on the boat as he lifts her as best he can with one arm. “push up from my shoulders.” he tells her, trying his hardest not to look at her, because her white dress is now translucent and he’s terrified of possibly seeing her underwear. he’s shivering now too, the cold water chilling him right through to his bones. 

splash.

chaewonrk·:

     for @rkxric. ✨

chaewon has been on a swan paddle boat once before. she was really young at the time and hadn’t actually done any of the paddling. her legs couldn’t reach the peddles back then. all these years later, at the grand height of 157cm, she can only just about reach them. she pushes along regardless, making the most use of her toes and the ball of her foot in the process. and it’s fun, really, it is … for the first fifteen minutes anyways. after that, the novelty is all gone. 

“my legs hurt,” she whines, pulling her feet back from the paddles. chaewon turns to eric with a roll of her neck and pouts at him, hands lying dejectedly in her lap. “whose idea was this again?” she asks, crossing her arms over her chest. she knows all too well that she was the one who originally pointed out the swan boats in the first place.

“urgh …” it feels like the last few weeks of training are finally catching up with her. this is what happens when she takes a day off. her body is fighting back against her new daily routine, it seems. she’s always been active, but she hasn’t been this active in a long time. “i just need to stretch my legs.”

hindsight is 20/20. chaewon doesn’t mean to stand up, she only lifts her butt off the seat by the tiniest bit as she leans forward to stretch, but it’s enough for the swan boat to start rocking back and forth. bent over as she is to try and stretch her hamstrings, chaewon’s sense of balance is thrown off, and that’s all it takes to send chaewon off the side of the boat. she lets out a yell, and quickly scrambles to the side of the boat, trying and failing to hoist herself back on. she holds on to it with one hand, and reaches up to eric with the other. “help! fucking help!”

eric had only ever been on a paddle boat once before. it’d been one of those weekends his dad had taken him out when he was young, back in LA. they’d gone to a really big lake where there were these same swan paddle boats and eric had begged him to go on one. he’d laughed and agreed to one short ride. they spent ages on the boat, eric staring around him in awe and his dad doing all the leg work. 

now, he’s tall enough to paddle himself, finding it not too difficult thanks to all the cycling he does. “i’ll paddle then, don’t worry.” he says with a smile, enjoying himself too much to want to head back yet. he likes being out on the river with chaewon, noticing how the sun reflects on the little ripples in the water, and gazing at the buildings on the other side of the river and their outline against the blue sky. he deigns not to answer her question, since he knows it was her who pointed them out - though he was just as enthusiastic, if not more so, to take them out on the water. 

“well, maybe you should cycle more, like me.” he says teasingly, grinning mischievously across at her. he doesn’t mind being the sole paddler, though he can see this getting tiring after a while. it’s a lot more difficult to push two people around in a boat with no help than it is to push two people round when both are pulling their weight. 

it’s a good thing they left their belongings back in the rental booth for the swam boat, as the next thing eric knows he’s watching chaewon topple overboard into the water. a horrified cry escapes him, hoping to god she can swim as he leans over the edge to grab her hand. he’s trying his hardest to pull her in without letting himself get pulled in, but he must’ve messed up his balance, because seconds later he too is falling into the water, almost toppling in right on top of chaewon. he bobs to the surface and spits out some water, blinking in shock, before he slowly starts laughing. 

.firsts

chaewonrk·:

chaewon’s first kiss was a certified disaster. she’d been fourteen, playing spin the bottle with a newly empty liquor bottle someone had stolen from their parents earlier in the night. she’d gotten to kiss her crush of a couple days, but her infatuation with him was quickly cut short by the sloppy way he’d triedto kiss her. needless to say, he became the laughing stock of her friend group for months after the fact.

she furrows her brow at eric’s admission, examining his face carefully for a hint of a lie. “really?” it’s a little embarrassing, chaewon supposes, pursing her lips as she thinks about it. she doesn’t know why he’d lie about something like this, so she comes to the conclusion that he must be telling the truth. “maybe you should count yourself lucky,” chaewon sighs, fixing her posture on the couch. “the first couple of guys i kissed acted like they were trying to wash my mouth out or something.” 

she can’t help smiling at his romantic notions. “you know, you don’t have to likesomeone to kiss them. i’ve been single for…” longer than she’d like, if she’s being honest. “a while now. nobody likable’s shown up either, but,” she makes a rolling gesture with her hands, insinuating what she wants to say instead of actually saying it. she doesn’t want eric to go throwing himself at just anyone though – if he hasn’t already by now, chaewon doesn’t think he ever will. even if going out or calling up someone reliable works for her, she knows it doesn’t suit everyone. but, if he does want to get it over with… “so you want a kiss then?” chaewon scoots a tad closer to him, and puts down her coffee cup. she hasn’t been paying attention to the cartoon in forever anyways.

eric isn’t surprised chaewon’s kissed people, when she looks like that. it’s understandable to him that he’d have lived his life kissless when he’s so average looking, when there were people walking around blessed with good looks, like chaewon. why kiss an eric, when you could kiss a chaewon, right? “i dunno, it sounds awful but it’s the experience and being able to say you’ve done it that i guess i’ve missed out on.”

he knows he doesn’t have to like someone, or be liked, to be kissed, romantically that is, but he doesn’t think anyone has ever liked him enough visually to want to kiss him either. he wonders why though, when he realises guys who he really thinks were less attractive than him had had their first kisses. it’s not that he thinks he’s handsome, because he doesn’t, he’s just average. at least he’s got good personal hygiene and wears clean clothes - a scary number of guys his age don’t even do those things, yet still get kissed.

“i just… think no one’s ever found me attractive enough to warrant kissing.” he admits, his blush staying fixed on his cheeks. it’s strange, admitting it to chaewon, what if she thinks less of him now? something about the thought makes his stomach twist unpleasantly. she’s a good friend and he’d not want to ruin that by making her think he’s lame. however, her question shakes his from his thoughts and he emits a light laugh. “of course i do. i just don’t think anyone wants to kiss me.” he says, assuming she means in general (because surely that wasn’t an offer). 

starter for @chaewonrk!

eric sits with his knees curled to his chest on the couch beside chaewon, his attention split between the cartoon playing on his laptop on the coffee table and the conversation they’re having, as he can’t simply sit and watch a tv show without doing something else at the same time. he’s mindlessly chewing on gummy candy, head leant against the back of the couch. the conversation, somehow, had shifted to kisses, and what kissing is like, and when they had their first kisses. 

“i’ve… never kissed anyone.” eric admits, his cheeks reddening slightly. sure, it’s not something really to be embarrassed about (even if some people would say it very much is at his big age), but he can’t help but be a little shy about it. he’s nineteen (nearly twenty, he’d say) and yet he’s never even had his first kiss. most people have at least had their first kiss before they’ve graduated high school, and here eric having absolutely zero experience in anything romantic. 

it’s not like he never wanted to kiss anyone, or sought out the opportunity, he’d just, somehow, never managed to be in the right situation to kiss someone, or be kissed himself. no one has ever had a crush on him, to his knowledge at least, and everyone he’d ever had a crush on was far out of his league, so kissing them was very much out of the question. 

“not that i haven’t wanted to, obviously. i just… don’t think anyone has ever liked me enough to want to kiss me.”