#disabledpeople

Anyone got any suggestions for a lighthearted movie where Disabled people aren’t props? Does this even exist is this wishful thinking on my part. Cause I’m so sick of seeing people like me be nothing more then plot points ways to move a story a long. I was watching Work It the other day and I was really looking forward to it cause Sabrina Carpenter but that’s besides the point and the thing is I was really enjoying it spoilers if you haven’t seen it until the scene where these two men are dancing and they’re both using forearm crutches and in the shot you see someone’s wheelchair. And this heavy weight just settled in my chest cause I knew these three actors where just here to fill a quota. And I knew the dancers weren’t here because it’s a fun dance movie and there showing of all kinds of dance they were their to inspire the love interest you could see it in his face the message was clear if these disabled people can dance I can dance with a screwed up knee. And I’m honestly so sick of disability being nothing more than a plot point for lazying writing and I know it’s a lot to ask cause the rest of the world hasn’t caught up but me and every other disabled person is a whole and complete person and are stories are worth telling too.

SPOONIE THOUGHTS #0002

Honestly I don’t know what to feel or what to do anymore I swing between terrified to angry to just sorta not caring. I live in the US and there are some states that have listed my decently rare disease SMA on a list of those hospitals can refuse to treat. I haven’t even bothered to check Washington’s plan I’m to afraid I’ll see SMA or other chronic illness and disabilities my friends have. I’m scared I’m turning 18 in a couple days, I’m supposed to go to college next year and I don’t know if that will happened. I’m scared because I just read a post from someone saying they just received a letter from their GP asking that she and her wife sign do not resuscitate papers so hospitals won’t waste resources on them. I’m scared this will happen to me. I’m scared but I’m also mad in a few days my school will be starting zoom classes and the school district has sent out emails talking about how easy and accessible this program is and my teachers have emailed about how easy it is. I’m mad because for my entire time I’ve been in high school I been fighting for the ability to video call into my classes when the elevator breaks and it breaks at least once a month from anywhere to a few days to a few weeks and because I’m in mainly AP classes which conveniently the majority of them at my school are upstairs I would miss out all my one or two of my classes so I fought and fought to be able to video call into my classes mind you I’d be doing so from a office in the school’s main office with a para sitting right next to me cause you can’t just leave a student unsupervised for who knows how long and the office I sit in is between two dean’s offices and I’m literally looking into the principals office. But when ever I asked I was told it was too hard or too much work and that each teacher would have to send home papers that would have to be signed getting parents permission that it was all right that this was happening because as they put they’d have no control over who was watching, listening and/ or recording the class despite the fact of was on school property in the main office surrounded by administrators and having a school employee who’s sole job was to watch me. But now video calls to class are easy and not a single permission slip has been sent out despite the fact these calls will be done from peoples homes and the school actually doesn’t have control over who will be watching listening and or recording the lessons. And then I go to not caring should I really be shocked that any of this is happening should I be shocked that in world that has people who advocate for the killing of disabled babies, in world where we still see sympathy articles written about parents who murder their disabled children should I be shocked that disabled people are being asked to sign off on their own deaths so resources aren’t wasted. Should I be shocked that the school district that has made me fight to be treated as a person my entire time in school, the same school that left the elevator broken for a month but the minute the theater program started complaining that it would be hard to put on the play without the elevator and magically the elevator was up and running in three days despite the fact I was asking almost every day when the elevator would be fixed cause I was starting to fail my language class because it is surprisingly hard to learn a language without access to someone who speaks the language and you know what I was told they didn’t know when it would be fixed cause the budget and they weren’t really sure what was wrong with the elevator. So you know I don’t whether to laugh or cry at this point.

So I’m currently watching Crip Camp and the only thing I can think of is why the fuck aren’t what these people did being taught in schools. We learn all about the fight for gender and racial equality and I literally had one teacher say that they do this so kids to today can remember and look up to the people who fought for their rights. What about the people who fought for my rights? The history books only ever cover the ADA signing they show the picture sitting with two disabled individuals signing the bill. And they act like their was no fight to get that I honestly thought the protesting was so minimal that their was no need to cover it cause it wasn’t a huge fight like the fight for racial equality. I didn’t know that there were marches and people going hunger strikes so and other disabled people can access the world. So thank you to the people that fought so I could live thank you.

You wanna know something really wild healthy people exist. And despite living with three totally healthy people it still hard to wrap my mind around it. Like their are people out there who can shower and not have to lie down after you mean people can have conversations with out getting winded like I don’t know if I can actually believe this but apparently it’s true