{A/N I love Elliot and idk I see these around and why not right}
-make out sessions on his couch, hands holding your hips or waist gently, anxious to move them.
deep conversations at 4am cause you both can’t sleep, telling him your ideas about what you would do if the world had a hard reset. -him listening, eyes watching your hands and body movements as you talk, smiling slightly to himself.
standing close to you on the street, subway, anywhere in public so no one can get to you -watching you sleep, his finger brushing over your face, loving how at peace you look, eyes closed, breathing slow, beautiful.
‘can…I hug you?’ ‘El..you don’t have to ask, if you wanna hug just hug me’
your hand squeezing his when you sit next to him to let him know you are real.
you watching him as he sleeps, wanting to touch him but only ghosting your finger over his features respecting his no touch policy.
-first time he hugs you without asking is after you have a panic attack, he finds you huddled up in the bed, crying and shaking, he moves fast arms around you hand running through your hair till you calm down.
-sleepy sex. Stoned sex. Rough sex. All the sex.
playing with his hands, tracing his veins, telling him about what his veins mean
-'love line?’ 'Yeah see, it goes past the end of your hand, but it splits, so you have a long love life but with many people, you love multiple people, but in different ways’
-he looks at you swallowing before nodding -'I love you…’
wide eyed replying smiling 'I love you too’
morning kisses when your half asleep still,
late night walks, his hand holding yours tightly,
-him letting you wear his hoodie,
-'happy capitalism made up love day’ the half smirk as he takes the box you wrapped, looking down at the handmade bracelet, a small 'E’ and your first initial hanging from it,
-'you don’t have to wear it, I just thought you’d like it’
silence as he looks at it tracing over the material before pulling it on tightening it
-'thank you’ his arms wrapping around your middle head pressing against your stomach
him not knowing how to do the whole Valentine’s Day thing, trying to cook, and sort of succeeds, French fries and slightly burnt chicken tenders.
-'I tried to cook, i’ you smiling before kissing his cheek stopping him mid sentence
‘its perfect,’ eating while talking about the stupidity of Valentine’s Day.
-him always having the bracelet on, running his fingers over it as a reminder that you are real.
An: Sup. Here’s I guess a continue of the last thing I posted? It’s elliot *MM* inner world things. Again the alters have there own inner world, as many systems do in people who have DID. So yes.
Hello friend….are you still there.
It’s been a while, inside the inner world of Elliot. He hasn’t needed me or Mr robot. They like to sit in the theater and watch his life.
I did for a while. But you didn’t show up. Since I found out who you really were, someone I made up to…..
I miss you friend. Mr robot says I need to explore the world built for us. The world that is outside the theater and the doors.
Are you out there? Waiting for me to realize?
I’m in bed, in a copy of the apartment in the outside world. It smells like you. The bed does, the pillows. Everything. Flippers here.
She misses you. I can tell. QWERTY swims by the window where you set him when you first showed up. You remember that day? I do.
“He’s probably bored. He deserves to look out at the city”
You were brazen like Shayla, soft like her, but stern like Angela. I didn’t notice it then. I do now.
You always made sure I was safe at night. When I wouldn’t sleep because of the drugs. You held me to your heart and let it lull me to sleep.
I miss you. But I think you know that. You know I miss how you laid next to me, even when you were t really there. You were to me.
Maybe when I close my eyes I’ll see you again.
“Hello Elliot” I can hear you.
“Elliot” pressure on my hips, like when you sat on my stomach. I thought it was annoying at first, you wore my hoodie. But I liked it on you.
“Open your eyes”
I see you, hair disheveled, my hoodie on, sat on my hips, legs on either side of them. My hands on your thighs
HI HELLO I AM NOT DEAD THIS BLOG IS NOT ABANDONED! I just have a mind that jumps around in my hyper fixations. I know it’s techniqully the 15th for us on the east coast but shhhhhh. Anyway enjoy….uhhh whatever this is.
Also in my mind MM is elliot prime because we only ever see MM as Elliot and Fake world Elliot is Elliot core. Anyway have some live letters from our favorites
Elliot *core*
“Hey babe. So I’m writing this because being on call for work means even the stupid holidays like Valentine’s Day mean I get dragged to a downed server room. So I hope this dumb love note suffice any missing me when you wake up. I was gonna try and make breakfast for you but last time I tried. Ended up almost burning the apartment down. So we’re ordering pizza tonight and watching your fav dumb romance movie. Yes I hate it but you love it so it’s worth the almost 2 hours watching the same tropes from every movie ever. Uh I don’t know how to end this. But….I love you. A lot. Krista said telling you was a huge thing in healing and I was freaking a bit but I like writing it. So I know I’ll like saying it. I love you. I, Elliot Alderson, love you. I’ll see you when I get back. We can even cuddle if you want.”
Mr. Robot.
“Hello sweetheart. Fuck me, how did people write shit like this back in the dark ages? Maybe they hoped one of them would die before the letter got back home. It’s Valentine’s Day also known as the day the world buys love at far too high a price. You know how me and the kid are on this kind of thing. Fuck Valentine’s Day, it’s another corporate holiday used to make you buy stupid cheap slave labor made bears and chocolate that’s more sugar and corn syrup then actual chocolate, never mind the children dying to get the smallest fraction of the chocolate that makes even one bar of the sugar goop that stacks the shelves. Anyway. I guess I’m just saying I won’t be here when you wake up, because F society calls. But I’ll be back tonight. Just some routine plans that need some kinks worked out. Maybe I’ll grab a stupid heart shaped pizza and we can watch a stupid movie. Till then…”
MM. aka Elliot prime
“Hello friend….well we’re so much more then friends now right? I mean you sleep next to me in bed, you help me when the emotions build to be too much. Sorry about that. I’m trying to handle it better. But with shayla gone and everything going into chaos, the normal routine is a bit bugged. Do you know what a bug is? What it does really? Bugs help the systems learn, help them kill or embrace problems. I know I don’t say much about what you are to me, a friend, a sex partner, a small comfort in a broken world. No. Your my bug. The thing that could kill or fix me. The thing that I tried so hard to delete but never could. The thing trapped in the blank CD right next to….never mind. Today’s Valentine’s Day. It’s early though, youre asleep. You always say how you hate today, it’s all about buying love, but you also had tabs stared in your laptop about cute things to do for your partner now that the world is collapsing. I didn’t mean to see them. I grabbed your laptop by mistake. I tried to figure out what would make you happy today, do I buy you something expensive that you’ll never want to wear out in fear of it being stolen? Or do I try and cook for you, and burn our apartment down? Our apartment….Krista would call me saying that progress, maybe it is. Maybe me thinking about wanting to give you something for a stupid made up day is progress too. I’m writing this because I have to go help darlene with things for a bit. But I’ll be back tonight. Maybe we can watch a movie, I think the pizza place down the street is doing a special for the fake love day, maybe I’ll grab one for us. I’ll see you later though. Happy fake love day to you my bug.”
So these are the differences I see in elliot and MM who I do thinks name is actually Elliot. Like how mr robots name is ‘mr robot’ because that’s what Elliot calls him but he never corrects Krista or anyone so it’s assumed that’s his name. So I think MMs name to his is Elliot as well. But that’s a whole other thing. I hope the anon who asked likes this I tried friend.
First: MM
He is much more closed off to touch, to people, to everyone. He is very very touch sensitive. Because I think MM is a trauma holder so he remembers the feeling of what their dad did. So being touched is just a reminder.
MM is much more cynical about the world. I don’t think he sees much good in it at all. I think he sees small pockets of decency but it’s rare.
He needs Krista. Needs her more then anyone else because she is his one place where he can say and feel anything. Because Krista is a therapist it’s what she does. She helps. And Mm sees Elliot and himself in her. As he says in the first season. “I want a way out of loneliness just like you”
MM is lonely, he doesn’t have friends, he has people who are elliots friends, but not really his. We see that with how he acts with Angela, and the small bits we get of how they were before he joined allsafe. And Mm is just slightly off on what they all remember.
MM has Schizoid personality disorder it’s in the way he acts, his lack of emotional range, him not really getting signals of people.
MM is different. But not so different it’s noticeable. It’s just like someone mentally moved the couch 1 inch to the left and now everyone is ramming into it.
Now. Core Elliot.
He I think, from the small scene we saw of him, the one on Halloween when Mm first came to be. I think he was a sort of normal cyber security guy.
He talked about how much the govt sucked, he maybe had an Instagram to follow on what Darlene and Angela were doing but he never posted.
He had a Facebook but he deleted it after he realized how dumb it was. He was normal.
He smoked a lot of weed to keep himself calm, he’s like Mm but way more chill. He seemed to have a strained sort of relationship with Darlene but not one so bad it was weird.
He was normal. Well as normal as he could be. He questioned if Darlene was still having panic attacks so it’s implied he probably has them. Not knowing the reason but having the feelings of it.
I think Elliot core is much more open to sex, he’s not a tinder guy but he’d hook up with someone. The rare one time a year he wanted to go out.
He loves Angela, like he loved her through and through. And Mm took that small part of Elliot and kept it I think.
Core Elliot was for all things a normalish computer hacker. He hacked his friends and anyone he wanted. He wasn’t all about world domination and saving the masses but he would talk about it.
I think before the event that brought MM to the world I think Elliot was not normal, but he faded into the background he didn’t want to be seen he liked his work as a white hat and that was that.
He maybe talked to a few people but he was content with his invisible status.
I think after the events of season 4 it took him longer to process that he was in control, and now is in therapy to understand what happened to him, the year he was gone.
He works on his relationship with darlene, and they become close, like they were when it was MM at the hold.
It’s hard, it’s not easy, but Darlene is his anchor to helping him through things.
I think Elliot, finds someone, maybe in a group therapy that his therapist suggests to help him branch out and talk to more people in a safe environment.
And over time they sort of help each other. Maybe Elliot and this person get married years and years down the line maybe they don’t. But I think Elliot tries to be better, to become himself again.
But MM, Mr robot, young him and mother are always there in case he needs them. When something is a little too much and none of his steps from therapy work. He has them. And he learns to be okay with that.
Core Elliot is a lot like MM but small differences, small things that are noticeable to Darlene and others now.
Core Elliot is like MM but more open to certain things that MM wasn’t. Like touch, Elliot doesn’t like to be touched but he doesn’t always shove people away, relationships, he can see the good in some people. Still hates the corruption but he knows not everyone is evil.
Core Elliot is and was just a normal, awkward, mentally ill hacker, socially awkward and not good with people per say, but he tried at times.
In a way I think he sees he needed MM, even if he doesn’t know why just yet, he knows he needed MM to help him. Just like how Mr robot was always in his corner to make sure no one fucked with him.
Core Elliot and MM are vastly different but also eerily similar. MM is all of elliots inner traits heightened and forced to the surface.
They both need the other.
So I hope this is okay on what you wanted anon. I tried my best because in my opinion MM and Elliot are vastly different but eerily similar because MM is just all of elliots inner traits brought to the surface. MM is all the traits Elliot core had to mask to seem normal in the real world.
[AN: DONT know what this is but ya know that’s most of my writings. Uhhh tagging @edteche2 cause she’s my only mr robot friend currently)
He loved her. He didn’t pretend, not like with everyone else in elliots life. He loved her fully. Her smile, her eyes in the morning, her soft touch when he was breaking inside.
He needed her, he needed her like he needed morphine, she was his bug.
His systems bug. The one that would fix him or kill him. He hoped it was the ladder of the two. He knew Mr.robot thought she was a virus at first. A flaw in the code he had crafted so carefully.
She laughed and he felt his stomach clench, his heart race when she looked at him. Is this what elliot always felt around her? Is this what he knew from the second she stepped into his life? That she was one of the rare good ones?
Her eyes. He loved those most, they didn’t hide anything, not with him, they told him everything she said was the truth.
He wondered if that’s why Elliot had more then one disk on her. He used to let her take photos, let her have moments captured just for her. He had them printed out, saved in an old shoe box.
He found himself looking at them, while she slept, ones of her and Elliot on the boardwalk, in the old Ferris wheel, one of her, laying asleep, the blanket tucked up against her, Elliot had taken it.
He loved her. He didn’t think he could love, he didn’t know much of the world outside the mission mr robot had given him. But he knew. He loved her.
Krista asked about her, he was honest then.
‘It sounds like, you love her Elliot, that’s a good thing, you let her in…’
He let her in….he let the bug in and make a home, in his system.
It wasn’t scary, not in the slightest.
He needed her. Her touch made him calm, her kiss felt like it was healing all the cracks inside him, she was his bug.
Fixing him.
He embraced this new coding. she wouldn’t be just another memory. She would be his forever. Even if Elliot fought him.
She was good. She was safe. She was home.
“I love you”
his voice sounded like a question, she looked up at him, her legs hitched up around his hips, he hadn’t been paying attention, they were in the middle of kissing, maybe that’s what made his mind think of everything. His hand was resting on her ribs, his thumb brushing the soft skin.
Her hand reached up, cupping his cheek, he leaned into her touch, needing it, craving it.
Joel Arnold joins us for a surprise episode of DRUNK DISNEY wherein we watch the original 1977 Pete’s Dragon in honor of the remake coming out this Friday!
Check it out as we drink to every song in the movie - there are a TON of them - and gush over how committed Jim Dale is to his role.
It’s an extra long episode (because the movie is extra long) and it’s also one of the funniest Drunk Disneys to date. Be sure to subscribe on YouTube and reblog on Tumblr!
