#fnaf incorrect quotes
FNaF Incorrect Quotes Because I CAN
Vanny: I’ve invited you here because I crave the deadliest game…
Gregory, nodding: Knife Monopoly.
Vanny: I was actually going to hunt you for sport, but now I’m really interested in whatever Knife Monopoly is.
~
Freddy: I lost the child.
Vanessa: How did you LOSE the child?!
Freddy: Well, to be fair, he is very small.
~
Vanny: I could kill you if I wanted.
Gregory: Yeah? So could any other human being.
Vanny:
Gregory: So could a dog.
Roxy:
Gregory: So could a dedicated duck.
Chica:
Gregory: You aren’t special.
~
Freddy: Gregory, I need you to swear—
Gregory:Fuck!
Freddy:
Freddy: I meant as in a promise—
~
Chica: I might not look in the best condition right now, but take a look at me and tell me what you think!
Roxy:
Chica:
Roxy:
Chica:
Roxy: Chica, I’m blind. What the fuck were you trying to achieve?
~
Freddy: Superstar, I have an idea for how we can solve this!
Gregory, pulling out a gun:Yeah?
Freddy: Wh- No! That’s not the idea, Gregory!
~
Chica: When was the last time you cried?
Roxy: Uh, 15 minutes ago. Why?
Chica: Really? That recent?
Roxy: YEAH? *voice crack* IS THAT AN ISSUE? *starts crying again*
~
Monty: I just ended a five-year relationship.
Chica: Oh no, are you okay?
Monty: Yeah, it wasn’t my relationship.
~
Roxy: Hey, Freddy—
Freddy: *sigh* Bonnie used to call me that…
Roxy: …Because it’s your fucking name.
william afton but with a p*rn stache
Blood by Billy Cobb is such a William Afton-y song. idk
headcanon: William calls his balls Fazballs and that’s the single reason Mrs Afton left him
william, coming back from his 20-minute ‘bathroom break’: y’all ever just stop jerking off and start crying
henry, watching william assemble the springbonnie suit on stage: ah yes, the ‘i’m not a furry’ to ‘i let my friend rail me in my fursuit after the show’-pipeline
michael:
michael: i have multiple questions and i don’t want any of the answers
william, outraged at the claims of fast food being sold in his diner: WE DONT SELL FAST FOOD HERE, MA’AM
william, to himself: it’s faz-food
[fredbear’s family diner then got in to get sued for giving 12 people food poisoning]
henry,busy talking up william to some customers: my coworker and longtime friend mr afton is gonna come out to take your order in a moment. i have to say, i’m incredibly glad that i had the chance to open this diner with him. you know, it was his brilliant idea-
william,emerging from the mens bathroom,drunk out of his mind,missing one shoe and without a shirt: henry where is the penis
william:
william: the pepis
william:peps
william:goddamit
william, entering the kitchen: sure smells nice in here
henry: oh hi william, how’s-
william: and this pizza scent isn’t the only thing i sniff up like a dog
william:
henry:
william: i have serious substance abuse problems
elizabeth, sitting next to michael in a diner booth: dad sure has been playing a lot of arcade games lately
michael: well yeah, that’s like, the only action he’s getting
elizabeth:
michael:
michael: mom and dad are getting a divorce
william, trying to explain why he looked through the entirety of fashion nova on the work computer:just…y’know, manly things. i definitely didn’t want to buy a dress for myself, no no. i was…jerking off!! y’know, like a REAL dude
william, taking his bunny look even when being in the form of code: furry isn’t a hobby. it’s a lifestyle
William to Glitchtrap:Shut up about me coming back. You are not my dad nor are you my children. I will be blaring Bad Apple through the Pizzaplex speakers if you keep forcing me to fight this new child.
Glitchtrap: …Okay, but you just basically talked smack to yourself.
