Captain Francis Crozier (Arctic Explorer, Professional Jared Harris) & The Tuunbaq (A Huge, Vengeful Flesh-Eating Polar Bear Monster), from AMC’s ‘The Terror’, sharin’ a Quiet Moment between all the, uh, COLD BOAT TROUBLE (I haven’t seen the show)
I also included a Handy Chart where I wax lyrical about these Cold Cold TerrorBoys and how I (Presume) they each Perish
Drawn for wonderful Terror Superfan @fabledquill , who you should follow IMMEDIATELY for Seams, Terror Memes and Illustr-emes
Sir John Franklin: lbr, at least 90% of us want to fight him. If you are in those 90%, you have a pretty good chance of winning – just make sure Lady Jane isn’t around. And look out for the Rosses, just in case. All in all, do fight.
Lady Jane: DON’T. She will beat you up with her umbrella and then turn the whole London against you and Charles Dickens will mock you in his new novel and you will have to flee the country and even that will not be enough. Do you really want to get in that much trouble? Also don’t let her catch you fighting Sir John – all hell will break loose and Tuunbaq will shiver. Do not fight.
Sophia Cracroft: DON’T either. She will talk you out of fighting her and then Lady Jane will catch you. Plus, why would you do that? She’s nice. Do not fight.
James Fitzjames: he fought off the Chinese, survived a bullet the size of a cherry, survived malaria (twice), walked 500 miles (and 500 more)… This dude will kick your ass like he kicked that ceiling and look fabulous while doing it. Also he has a cheetah. And Le Vesconte. Do not fight.
Francis Crozier: give the poor man a break, will ya? He has enough on his plate as it is. Though if you do fight, he will probably win unless he is too drunk. In which case you will have either Blanky or Jopson (or both of them) to deal with, and you Do Not. Want. That. Do not fight.
Thomas Blanky: sure, go ahead and try to fight him. Just don’t forget to write your will beforehand because you will not be getting out of this alive. Do not fight.
Thomas Jopson: do not let his appearance fool you. He might look and smile like an angel but if you dare to insult his captain or his family hewill fight youandwin. Do not fight.
Lt. Gore: he will probably think you want to spar, so he’ll play along but you have no chances of winning. Might accidentally kick your ass but will apologize afterwards and you will feel like a fool. Seriously though, why would you fight him? Don’t.
Lt. Little: I’d say you have pretty good chances of winning but then again, why would you fight him? He’s just doing his best. Don’t fight.
Lt. Irving: you’ll win, especially if you catch him unawares, and I get why you might want to fight him, but… maybe don’t? In all honesty, the guy isn’t that bad. Leave him to his watercolors and fight someone else.
Henry Collins: is that you, Dr. Stanley? Leave the man be, he’s suffered enough. Do not fight.
Harry Goodsir: YOU HEARTLESS MONSTER, HOW CAN YOU EVEN THINK OF FIGHTING HIM??? But if it comes to that, he will win with the power of science and feel really bad about it. DO NOT FIGHT.
Cornelius Hickey: do not fight Cornelius Hickey. I repeat: do not fight Cornelius Hickey. You might win one battle (especially if he doesn’t have a knife on him), but he will win the war. He will strike when you’re least expecting it and no one will find your body afterwards. Again: do not fight him.
William Gibson: depends on his relationship status. If he and Hickey are still together, see Cornelius Hickey and stay away. If they’ve already broken up, however, you have all the chances of winning and tbh he deserves that. If the breakup happened recently, you might be able to get Hickey to help you. Probe the background, establish the situation, then make your move.
Silna: HOW CAN YOU BE SO CRUEL… and stupid? She will kick your ass without breaking a sweat and Tuunbaq will finish you. Do not fight.
Tuunbaq: you don’t have a chance. Stand still and pray.
Dr. Stanley: watch out for scalpels, torches and toe-cutting things, but apart from that – DO IT. FIGHT HIM.
John Bridgens: the man is a walking library, he will predict your moves and will always be at least one step ahead. Also: wtf? He’s literally done nothing wrong and you will upset Peglar. Do not fight.
Henry Peglar: LOOK AT THIS CUTE NERD. LOOK AT THIS RAY OF SUNSHINE. YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF. DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT FIGHTING HIM.
David Young: THAT’S IT. TURN ON YOUR LOCATION, I JUST WANT TO TALK.
[Image description: Fanart for The Terror, but it’s a Night at the Museum AU. A shadow looms on the floor while several tiny figures hide around a corner. A marine is peering out cautiously, Gore pats the back of a frightened Goodsir, Peglar and Des Voeux look relatively calm.]
The Lieutenants react to you telling them you’re pregnant
Edward Little
“I love you, Y/N, I can’t wait to be a father!”
John Irving
“To give birth outside of wedlock is a sin. You gotta get an abortion.”
Graham Gore
“Wow! That’s great news! I can’t wait to live to watch our child grow up, I always promise I’ll be there for you both!”
Henry Thomas “Dundy” Dundas Le Vesconte
“Oh ho ho! A little benjo baby of our own, ey? Can’t say I’m suprised, wink!”
James Walter Fairholme
“Cool.”
George Henry Hodge
“When I was a boy… I was told by my parents… that babies were brought down by the storks… A fantastical tale, I suppose I was naiive to trust it… but under that haze of childhood you believe all matter of lies…”
About Graham Gore Fitzjames said that “he plays the flute dreadfully well”
Apparently Fitzjames owned a flute as a teenager but never had much time to actually play it. He took it with him on the HMS Pyramus and HMS St Vincent.
After that we hear no more of the flute.
[Detail from: The Interior of a Midshipman’s birth, 1821 Print, after Captain Frederick Marryat, British Museum]
Fitzjames mentions the flute in a few letters:
HMS Pyramus June 29th 1826
Dearest Uncle
You no doubt expected a letter from me yesterday but I could not get on board till to day — so I did not write — I arrived quite safe at Portsmouth on Tuesday Morning, but when I got here I had to pay 10 Shillings for they said that when I was booked you only paid 10 Shillings. I told them that I paid a sovereign & they kept my luggage till I had paid it — I forgot the ink Powder but got every thing else quite safe — Mr Sterling got me a very nice flute indeed and I have got it quite safe
—–
HMS St Vincent Decr 20th 1830
My Dear Uncle
I am now comfortably on board, and am a little more accquainted with my messmates some of them, indeed all of them, are very nice fellows, and I think I shall be very comfortable. I have a good birth for my desk, and one of the mates has allowed me to keep my flute and several other things in his cabin.
—-
To William Munn [a friend/neighbour from Blackheath]
In the Bosphorus HM Cutter Hind
April 10th 1832
[…] The flute gets on slowly as I have not much place & time to play. You must be quite a professor by this time.
[Detail from: ‘Master B finding things not exactly what he expected’, the midshipman arrives on board ship; study for an illustration to 'The Life of a Midshipman’, 1820 Drawing by Captain Frederick Marryat, British Museum]
Thanks@marryat92 for pointing me to these wonderful illustrations
over on twitter i’ve been participating in @themothfindergeneral’s month-long terror art fest, #theterrortober! the theme i’ve chosen for myself is @terrebus-fc, so here’s an assortment of doodles from the first week!
[ID: Nine-square alignment meme with “weird,” “happy” and “intelligent,” across the top and “kind,” “sexy,” and “genuine” down the side. Characters from The Terror (2018) fill the boxes: Thomas Blanky is in “weird / kind,” Thomas Hartnell is in “happy / kind,” Alexander MacDonald is in “intelligent / kind,” Henry Thomas Dundas Le Vesconte is in “weird / sexy,” Graham Gore is in “happy / sexy,” James Fitzjames is in “intelligent / sexy,” John Irving is in “weird / genuine,” Henry Peglar is in “happy / genuine,” and Harry Goodsir is in “intelligent / genuine.” /end ID]
