Sir John Franklin: lbr, at least 90% of us want to fight him. If you are in those 90%, you have a pretty good chance of winning – just make sure Lady Jane isn’t around. And look out for the Rosses, just in case. All in all, do fight.
Lady Jane: DON’T. She will beat you up with her umbrella and then turn the whole London against you and Charles Dickens will mock you in his new novel and you will have to flee the country and even that will not be enough. Do you really want to get in that much trouble? Also don’t let her catch you fighting Sir John – all hell will break loose and Tuunbaq will shiver. Do not fight.
Sophia Cracroft: DON’T either. She will talk you out of fighting her and then Lady Jane will catch you. Plus, why would you do that? She’s nice. Do not fight.
James Fitzjames: he fought off the Chinese, survived a bullet the size of a cherry, survived malaria (twice), walked 500 miles (and 500 more)… This dude will kick your ass like he kicked that ceiling and look fabulous while doing it. Also he has a cheetah. And Le Vesconte. Do not fight.
Francis Crozier: give the poor man a break, will ya? He has enough on his plate as it is. Though if you do fight, he will probably win unless he is too drunk. In which case you will have either Blanky or Jopson (or both of them) to deal with, and you Do Not. Want. That. Do not fight.
Thomas Blanky: sure, go ahead and try to fight him. Just don’t forget to write your will beforehand because you will not be getting out of this alive. Do not fight.
Thomas Jopson: do not let his appearance fool you. He might look and smile like an angel but if you dare to insult his captain or his family hewill fight youandwin. Do not fight.
Lt. Gore: he will probably think you want to spar, so he’ll play along but you have no chances of winning. Might accidentally kick your ass but will apologize afterwards and you will feel like a fool. Seriously though, why would you fight him? Don’t.
Lt. Little: I’d say you have pretty good chances of winning but then again, why would you fight him? He’s just doing his best. Don’t fight.
Lt. Irving: you’ll win, especially if you catch him unawares, and I get why you might want to fight him, but… maybe don’t? In all honesty, the guy isn’t that bad. Leave him to his watercolors and fight someone else.
Henry Collins: is that you, Dr. Stanley? Leave the man be, he’s suffered enough. Do not fight.
Harry Goodsir: YOU HEARTLESS MONSTER, HOW CAN YOU EVEN THINK OF FIGHTING HIM??? But if it comes to that, he will win with the power of science and feel really bad about it. DO NOT FIGHT.
Cornelius Hickey: do not fight Cornelius Hickey. I repeat: do not fight Cornelius Hickey. You might win one battle (especially if he doesn’t have a knife on him), but he will win the war. He will strike when you’re least expecting it and no one will find your body afterwards. Again: do not fight him.
William Gibson: depends on his relationship status. If he and Hickey are still together, see Cornelius Hickey and stay away. If they’ve already broken up, however, you have all the chances of winning and tbh he deserves that. If the breakup happened recently, you might be able to get Hickey to help you. Probe the background, establish the situation, then make your move.
Silna: HOW CAN YOU BE SO CRUEL… and stupid? She will kick your ass without breaking a sweat and Tuunbaq will finish you. Do not fight.
Tuunbaq: you don’t have a chance. Stand still and pray.
Dr. Stanley: watch out for scalpels, torches and toe-cutting things, but apart from that – DO IT. FIGHT HIM.
John Bridgens: the man is a walking library, he will predict your moves and will always be at least one step ahead. Also: wtf? He’s literally done nothing wrong and you will upset Peglar. Do not fight.
Henry Peglar: LOOK AT THIS CUTE NERD. LOOK AT THIS RAY OF SUNSHINE. YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF. DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT FIGHTING HIM.
David Young: THAT’S IT. TURN ON YOUR LOCATION, I JUST WANT TO TALK.
To accept one’s past—one’s history—is not the same thing as drowning in it; it is learning how to use it. An invented past can never be used; it cracks and crumbles under the pressures of life like clay in a season of drought.
from James Baldwin, the fire next time, courtesy of @nedlittle
This is the closest I’ll ever come to filling the “Like a bad pun,” square of my @theterrorbingo card, and it’s technically only like, a week late, so I’m doing it—time is fake anyway, you know.
Apologies for bringing this right back to the Victorians as per usual, but this is why Lady Franklin was who she became: you can’t divorce your husband when he’s the most famous Arctic ghost story the world’s ever heard (especially not when you were the one who made him that way, refusing to let him go quietly into that good Admiralty death list)
[Transcript: As John T. Irwin eloquently summarizes, a labyrinth resembles a maze because it is “always open from the outside but appears to be unopenable from within.” End transcript]
ok i’m reading about labyrinths for personal reasons and. obsessed with thinking about narrative as something that is ‘open from the outside but unopenable from within’… can’t stop picturing someone just. stumbling into a story and getting locked in from the inside because all of a sudden the part is cast, their fate is set, and they have a role to play and lines to read… everything is up for grabs until the moment the story starts and then the ending is fixed and you’ve been buried alive inside a structure that gives the illusion of agency while leading you all the while down the only existing path toward the very center of itself, where what awaits you is death..
[Transcript: to tell a story is to align an already known set of events along an arc. End transcript]
[Transcript: They were last seen by European whalers in Baffin Bay awaiting good conditions to enter the Arctic labyrinth. End transcript.]
Francis Beaufort: “Let due honours and rewards be showered on the heads of those who have nobly toiled in deciphering the puzzling Arctic labyrinth, and who have each contributed to their hard-earned quota.” (Kenneth McGoogan, Lady Franklin’s Revenge (2006) pg. 385)
[Transcript: The past tense is a very sturdy thing. End transcript.]
Lady Franklin: “Dear Love, / Haven’t I always told you / there is / what happens, / and then / there is how / we choose to tell it?” (Corinna McClanahan Schroeder, “Letters to the Dead” (2020) pg. 64)
