warnings: cunnilingus, dirty talk, implications of unprotected sex, hint of size kink, vanilla
a/n:i wanted to explore dirty talk from the female perspective because i talk a lot during sex lol. we always see men doing the dirty talking, but like, what if more readers were the filthy ones?? so therefore, this is entirely self indulgent, okay?
You’re so squirmy, hips rolling and twisting in effort to follow Kagami’s mouth. A heavy palm settles on the pudge of your lower belly, calming your movements with its weight. The presence of Kagami’s hand is a solid reminder that you don’t have to chase him, he’ll always come to you. And he does, quells your incessant chasing with the catch of his mouth settling right over the swollen bud that needs him most.
You answer him — offer him the highest thanks in the form of a squeal, wet and choppy, like you’re surprised. Your own hand brushes over your own flesh to settle in his hair, a weight that he welcomes with a deep groan. You squeal again, thighs shaking against the sides of Kagami’s face. Your little clit must be so sensitive if a few laps of the tongue and his own raspy sounds already have you gripping the sheets.
suna corrects you without looking up from his textbook. his left hand supports the side of his head on the table while his right hand is highlighting contents from the book that he deems important. (although at the rate he’s going, there are way more highlighted words on the page than nonhighlighted ones.)
you shoot him what you hope is an intimidating glare from across the library table, even though he’s not looking.
since your little outing together, the both of you have definitely gotten more attached. attending shared classes together and never failing to save a seat for each other, going for meals while chattering about anything you could think of, having movie and tv show marathons into the late hours of the night, texting endlessly almost every single day. sometimes, you even think he’s the closest confidant you have at the moment, and a small part of you hopes he could say the same about yourself. however, it’s only last week when he asks that you start calling him by his given name, and you’ve told him that it’s going to get some time getting used to calling him by his first name when you’ve been referring to him by his last name for the past few weeks.
“rintarou,” you repeat, to suna’s satisfaction, “what do you think about terushima yuuji?”
a/n: i have no idea what to tag this it’s just me not being able to shut up about dejun but enjoy~
to you, it was pretty obvious you had a thing for xiaojun. or at least you thought it was, but the boy seemed entirely oblivious to it. which thinking about it was probably for the best. xiaojun was most passionate about his music and performing and you’d never want to jeopardize that, even if you did stand a chance. so you kept your feelings at bay, as much as you could working beside the beautiful man. you did your job and helped him do his, and that’s how it was.
xiaojun was naturally friendly and developing a friendship with him came easily, the two of you being comfortable enough with one another to go past something strictly business. and that comfort helped with your job, being one of the staff who helps with styling and makeup. makeup artist was your primary role, so you spent a lot of days being up close and personal, which was probably no good for your health, but was the closest you could get to your deeper desires. you had learned to be content with that.
what you failed to pick up on was that xiaojun harbored feelings of his own. the not-so-subtle stares, the fond eyes he held for you. the way he hung on every word when you spoke and how he reveled in your speech when you shared tiny details about yourself with him.
xiaojun thought and felt similarly to you, thinking that it wouldn’t be the best idea to get involved, but also that you wouldn’t want a guy like him. he didn’t think anything was really wrong with him, but when he compared himself to the other guys, he felt like he wasn’t enough. to be frank, he felt too inexperienced.
to xiaojun, you were so smart, insightful, always ready to help and so capable. you weren’t that far from his age, but still he couldn’t help but look up to you. you were all of those things without even being condescending, only ever lifting the people around you up and encouraging them. which is probably why xiaojun’s brain felt so liberated to let it get this far. he just hoped you’d never catch on to his lingering eyes and you could just stay like this, as his kind noona, as his friend.
but of course, secrets can only stay hidden for so long.
okay, so maybe xiaojun had a little problem on his hands. in his humble opinion, he’d say a pretty decent sized problem, but a problem nonetheless. and he only had maybe five minutes to solve it before he had to get his makeup done. by you. he could not let you see him like this.
he didn’t mean to get this way, usually he was good at controlling his urges and suppressing any feelings that accompanied them, but when you showed up to the studio for the day, he never stood a chance. you had decided to wear a dress today. different from your usual loose fitting pants and tops, this dress was more form fitting, hugging your torso and allowing his eager eyes to take in the curve of your chest all the way down to your hips where it was a little more flared to reveal your pretty legs.
fuck, this wasn’t helping. xiaojun threw himself back against the wall and held his face in his hands, feeling disappointed with himself that he’d think such lewd things about you, and as a result, be sporting a very noticeable hard on in his pants right now.
he had already been in here for ten minutes, excusing himself almost immediately upon your arrival and retreating to a single person dressing room to try to calm himself down. but it wasn’t going away, and he only had a few minutes before he needed to get ready for the shoot. where he’d have to be next to you. with you looking at him with your pretty big eyes and leaning over to apply his makeup and your soft touches on his jaw when you hold his face steady, and your skin peeking out from the lower neckline of the dress and nope. he couldn’t go out there like this. it wasn’t even going down, how was he going to face you?
xiaojun felt the frustration filling him rapidly, panic joining the flood to his senses, and he knew there was only one way to get rid of this in time. and it made him feel sick. he hated that the idea even entered his brain. he was normally too shy to even participate in conversation that was remotely sexual in nature, never mind do something so dirty where anyone could see him. was he really about to jerk off in a dressing room? he glanced at the time on his phone. he had enough time to bust one out.
but it wasn’t that easy. even as hard and aching as he was, he was hesitant with his touches, trying to keep from making any sounds that would allude to what was going on in here. more than that, he couldn’t stop thinking of you. thinking of your warm voice and even warmer eyes and how disgusted you would probably be with him if you knew what he was doing. he was disgusted with himself. he felt like such a pervert doing this without your knowledge. he imagined the disappointment in your eyes if you ever found out and it made him want to cry. tears were already welling up out of frustration and shame and he couldn’t keep going.
xiaojun kneeled down on the ground hunched over with his head in his hands, probably looking as disgraceful as he felt. he tried his best not to cry, but thought maybe if he did it would kill his boner. he didn’t want you to see his eyes and ask what was wrong, though, so he just tried to calm himself and breathe.
in his concentration he hadn’t realized he’d been there for more than five minutes, already being past the time he needed to start getting his makeup done. he didn’t notice your soft footsteps approaching the door. he didn’t even notice your careful knocks on the door or the click of the doorknob twisting and revealing his pitiful form to you.
it had been a while since xiaojun had literally ran away earlier. you’d walked into the set and greeted the rest of the boys, and before you could even get to xiaojun he was booking it to the dressing rooms. figuring that he just needed some space, you paid little mind to it, growing increasingly concerned only when you saw the time tick by on the clock, every other member already made up and ready for the shoot. you decided at this point it was okay to look for him and at least see what was going on and try to get him back to start the day. you never in your wildest dreams expected to walk in on what you were seeing now.
xiaojun was all but crumpled on the floor, his face buried in his palms, his shoulders shaky, and his pants down to his knees on the floor. you couldn’t stop your eyes from wandering south and that’s when you saw the tent in his gray briefs, a large wet spot spread over the front. he still hadn’t noticed your presence, and you were thankful cause you were sure the look on your face was absolutely ridiculous.
your heart felt like it was in your ass and you were hit with three overwhelming desires. the first, to rush to his side and try to comfort him and find out what’s wrong. the second, to close the door and find a room of your own cause you were definitely soaking your panties now. and the third and most prominent, you wanted to help him relieve his problem.
you did none of those as you now had the attention of xiaojun, who nearly jumped out of his skin when he looked up and saw you in the doorway, his heart two beats shy of a heart attack. he gaped at you, floundering for the words to say as he just curled into a ball and did his best to hide himself. when you said and did nothing, he swallowed thickly and said the only thing his brain could muster.
“noona, i’m so sorry, it’s not what it looks like.”
if he was on the verge of crying before, now he felt like he was going to break down. tears stung at his eyes as he watched your face, blurry through his tears. he fucked up. he fucked everything up. xiaojun let his head fall between his knees and hugged them close to his chest, trying to soothe himself and also astral project to a place where he hadn’t just been caught like this, by you.
you snapped out of your stupor at the sound of his voice breaking into a small sob, jumping into action, closing and locking the door behind you and carefully approaching him on the floor. to hell with the shoot. they could do all the other boys first. right now, you had to figure out what happened here.
you kneeled a few inches away from xiaojun, a tentative hand coming to rest on his elbow, you figured that was the safest spot. you moved it to his knee when he didn’t respond to your touch and decided to break the ice.
“junie, what’s the matter?” you tried to sound as soft and neutral as possible. he cried harder at your words and you felt your heart clench with sadness. you had decided that you hated seeing xiaojun cry more than anything in the world. and you needed to make it to stop.
you tested the waters and put your hands on his shoulders, gently rubbing them in an attempt to calm him. “hey, it’s okay. you don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to, but is there anything i can do to make you feel better?”
of course, you were still so kind to him, even when he was being a creep like this. he didn’t deserve it. he didn’t deserve your help. but he was so humiliated he couldn’t move. he didn’t know what to do. he wanted to come clean just so he could rid himself of these burdensome feelings and at least know he was honest. maybe you would understand. you were always so understanding. he whined and shook his head miserably.
you were glad to at least get a response from him, now wondering if your presence was unwanted. you decided to push a little further and if he didn’t budge, you would leave. pretend you never saw anything.
“no, you don’t want me to help? do you want me to leave you alone?”
you were being so patient and now he was just being rude. he huffed and shook his head faster, hoping you’d accept his nonverbal responses.
you understood that he didn’t want you to leave, he just needed some time, so you carried on caressing his shoulders.
“can you tell me what happened?”
honestly, you had a pretty good idea, if the still present bulge in his briefs was any indication, but you weren’t sure how he ended up like this. he was already upset before he’d noticed you walked in on him, so it couldn’t just be embarrassment. you wanted to hear it from him.
xiaojun let out a shaky breath, no longer crying and just recovering from the sobs that left him. he knew he had to explain himself. he realized that letting you make your own story would probably feel worse to him than even your worst reaction to the truth. so he steadied his breathing and lifted his head, still covered by his hands. he wasn’t ready to see you yet.
“i don’t want you to get mad at me, but i’ll understand if you do.”
okay, now you were really confused. why would you be mad at him… for being caught jerking off? clearly something was wrong beforehand, but you still walked in on him. shouldn’t he be upset over that? you stayed silent and squeezed his shoulder, silently telling him to continue.
he rubbed at his eyes and sighed. this is it. there’s no going back from here. he’s going to tell you the truth and everything will be different. at best, you’ll pretend that it doesn’t bother you and just be mildly uncomfortable around him and at worst, you’ll be repulsed by him and avoid working with him in the future. maybe even quit working for the group. he pushed down those thoughts. he owed you the truth.
his voice sounded foreign to him when he started speaking, hoarse and small to his own ears. he peeled his hands from his face but kept his head down, not wanting to see the look on your face as he poured himself out to you.
“i’m really sorry, noona. i didn’t mean to. i didn’t want to do this, i just couldn’t control it. i thought it would go away on its own and when it didn’t i tried to make it go away and it still didn’t and i just felt so awful cause i thought such dirty things about you. i just can’t help it. i…” he hesitated, unsure whether it was weird to include this but figuring if he’s gone this far, he should bare it all and let you decide with the whole truth.
“i just like you a lot. you’re so good to me and you’re so beautiful and i couldn’t stop my mind from wandering but i know it’s wrong and i understand if you never want to talk to me again. i just don’t want you to think of me like this.”
your head felt numb. you had stopped your small motions on his shoulders, needing all your focus to comprehend his words. he was like this… because of you? he liked you?
your heartbeat increased to a steady hum, vibrating in your chest at his confession. there was so much to unpack, and much you’d have to address later, but for now the boy you had such strong feelings for needed your help, and needed to be relieved from his guilt.
without speaking you placed a hand on his jaw, raising his head to look into his eyes. they were red and puffy and he looked so pitiful yet so pretty. you were sure you’d started daydreaming in the studio and this was all fabricated in your mind. but the way xiaojun was searching your eyes was real, and the way he leaned into your touch, now realizing you had been stroking his cheek this whole time, was veryreal.
you wanted to take it slow, to comfort him and tell him it was okay, but you were still vaguely aware of the passing of time and knew you didn’t have much of it. you needed to get your hands on him - now.
“can i help you?”
was he hearing that right? did you mean what he thought you meant? not only had you not gotten upset with him, but you wanted to help him. does that mean you feel the same? or at least want him in the same way?
as if reading his mind, you nodded, a small smile spreading over your delicate pink lips.
you realized he needed a little more assurance before you could go on. “i like you too, junie, a lot. i never wanted to act on it, but i can’t help it either. and i’d really like to help you, if that’s okay.” your eyes flicked down to his problem.
surely he was imagining this. you hand combing through his bangs brought him down to earth and he could only nod. he didn’t even just want you at this point. he neededyou.
“let me make it better, junie.” the nickname rolling off your tongue and sending a shiver down his spine.
you leaned in slowly, eyes on his lips before fluttering closed as you hovered barely an inch away from him, his hot breath grazing your skin.
to your surprise, he closed the gap and pressed his lips against yours, desperation flowing through him. you led him in moving your lips, deepening the kiss and relishing how soft his were. heat rushed through you and you felt greed rising up in you. you wanted more. you needed to taste him.
poking at his lips with your tongue you pushed into his mouth, his lips instantly parting for you with a gasp, and you licked at his tongue with your own.
xiaojun’s breathing picked up and you knew he was still feeling it. he wanted this just as much. deciding to be forward you push one of his legs down by his knee, letting your hand slowly crawl up his thigh.
he struggled to keep up with your kiss, your tongue twirling hypnotically around his, freezing when he felt your hand on his thigh. panic took over his senses once again, realizing he had left out one minor detail. he was a virgin.
“n-noona.”
you pulled yourself from him reluctantly, looking back into his eyes that were angled with worry. “what’s wrong? is it too much?”
he straightened against the wall and shook his head, trying to look confident. he need to look a little less pathetic when he said this.
“i’ve… i’ve never done this before.” he fascinated himself with the sleeves of his hoodie.
your heart started rolling around in your chest. could he be any sweeter? you felt bad for a second, wanting his first time to be a little nicer than just some quick handjob in a dressing room, but more than anything you wanted to make him feel good.
“that’s okay. i’ll just use my hands and if you want me to stop at any point i will.” you tried not to sound patronizing.
he shook his head again, a pout taking over his face this time. “don’t want you to stop. i want you. i just don’t know what to do.” he blushed.
you had to giggle at how adorable he could be even in a situation like this, taking his face in your hands and pecking his pouted lip. “it’s okay, you don’t have to do anything. let me take care of you.”
your smooth voice melted him to his core, fully surrendering to you and your touch. he trusted you. he wanted you to do whatever you wanted to him. he just nodded and threw his head back against the wall.
you glanced at your phone, already being way past the time he needed to be ready by. what’s five more minutes going to do? not wanting to be interrupted, you sent a text to kun, asking him for a few more minutes to talk to xiaojun and to have everyone else go before him. he replied in seconds, apparently having been worried and told you he’d do what he could and to try to hurry and get him back out quickly.
you couldn’t tell if he was suspicious from his text alone, so you threw your cares with your phone somewhere on the floor and went back to the beautiful boy in front of you. the same boy who had just admitted his feelings for you and the fact that he was hard because of you.
returning to kneel in front of him, you placed one more quick kiss on his lips and smoothed your hands down his chest to his hips then his thighs, straightening his legs on either side of you. his face and neck were flushed and he barely held eye contact, feeling shy under your gaze. you were drinking up the sight, saving a mental image for later.
without wasting any more time, you palmed him over his briefs, his dick still straining under the material.
“this must be hurting, hm?” you gave him a few experimental strokes through the fabric and he whimpered, nodding frantically at you.
before continuing, you decided not to do this on the floor, your bare knees also starting to go numb on the cold tile, and pulled him to stand. “come on, let’s get you on the couch.” you helped him pull his pants off over his feet so he didn’t trip on them and laid him across the futon.
he looked nervous, fidgeting with the hem of his hoodie, looking so small and fragile under you like this. it ignited a flame in you that you’d yet to place, saving the thought for later to pay attention to the boy beneath you.
you held his eyes as you hooked your fingertips under his briefs, pulling them down his thighs slowly, then letting them trail down his torso to his now bared lower half. his dick stood tall against his stomach, tip an angry red and glistening with precum. you weren’t sure what to expect, but he was bigger than you thought he would be. of course, his dick was just as pretty as him.
“such a big boy” you cooed, not sure where the tone came from but continuing as xiaojun seemed to twitch when you spoke. he turned his head from you.
“noona, don’t tease me.” he sounded so small. you rubbed his thigh and smiled.
“i‘m not. you’re just so cute, so tall and hard for me.” he let out a whine.
you curl your fingers around his length, finally feeling him under your touch, already intoxicated by his warmth and velvety skin. wiping your thumb over his tip, you collect his precum and spread it over his head, earning a loud moan from him.
“as much as i want to hear those pretty noises, you gotta keep it down so no one hears us, okay, baby?”
xiaojun felt warmth pour through his chest. he never knew how much he wanted to hear you call him that. he wanted to be your baby. he nodded and brought his sleeved wrist to his mouth, his other hand gripping his hoodie.
you started pumping him in a steady rhythm, not wanting to make him wait any longer but trying to make it as enjoyable as possible. he was squirming under you doing his best to keep quiet, small moans and breaths escaping anyway. he never knew how good it could feel with your hands bringing him there. he was half convinced he’d never be able to be fully satisfied with his own hand again.
your free hand came to scratch at his inner thigh, making him shiver under you. “tell me, what were you thinking of that had you so worked up?”
he gulped, barely coherent but still finding the words, “was your dress. thinking about your… breasts,” he whispered the word, “wanted to touch them, suck on them, have them all over me.” he was panting, his words having a clear effect on both of you. fuck, he was so hot.
“mm, i would love that, baby. maybe next time, somewhere more private.” you both laughed airily.
you wanted to stay here and pleasure him all day, ignoring your responsibilities in favor of earning pretty sounds from your pretty boy. but you knew you couldn’t be much longer, hoping this would be enough for xiaojun and that you’d have another, better time with him soon.
with that you picked up speed, twisting around his head and paying special attention to the edges, occasionally running you finger over his leaking hole and pulling sharp gasps from him.
maybe it was because it was his first time with someone else, or because he’d been hard for so long, or just because it’s you, but the coil in him was tightening embarrassingly fast. you felt so good.
you could tell he was getting close with his moans increasing in pitch, barely held back by his hand over his mouth. he looked like an angel. he didn’t even look real. but you knew this was because not even your mind could produce something so divine. you wanted to see him let go for you, because of you. with that goal in mind you pumped even faster, making sure the most friction was around his head.
he felt himself falling hard, barely able to control himself under your ministrations. it was so much. his moans bounced off the walls of the small room back to his ears, making him wince. he knew she shouldn’t be so loud but couldn’t stop.
“it’s okay, baby, let go.”
he whimpered, entire body shaking as he was nearing the edge. he wondered if he could find a way to stop time and have more of you to himself, but he was grateful for this for now.
your hand moved up his abdomen, lifting the hoodie up to his chin and putting his torso on full display. you eyed his chest hungrily, flicking a finger over one of his pink buds and drawing a small cry from him. so sensitive. tucking the fabric under his chin, you brought your second hand to his center to cup his balls, gently thumbing at them and learning what he liked best.
between that new sensation and the twisting motion you were using, he was going crazy. you worked him so well, he was surprised he’d even held out this long. almost on cue, he felt the heat pool and he knew he was at his end.
“noona,oh my god,” he was almost thrashing in your hold now, “gonna cum.”
he held off for a few more seconds, unsure if it was okay to just let go like this, but with one particular twist of your wrist, he was sent spiraling over the edge.
“cumming!” his hips bucked into your fist, strings of cum shooting impressively far up his chest, painting him in white.
you let him set the pace with his thrusts as you milked him through, watching his face for a tell of when it was too much. he whined and jerked in your hand and you let him go, dipping a finger in a streak of cum on his tummy and bringing it to your lips to taste.
xiaojun’s eyes blew wide at that, sitting up and putting a hand on your wrist to stop you, but having been too late.
“sweetest thing i’ve ever tasted.”
the tips of his ears burned red and he let himself slump back on the couch. “thank you, noona. i’m sorry you had to find me like that.”
you went to run a hand through his hair but decided against it, wanting him to look somewhat composed when you went back out there.
“don’t be. i’ll admit, i never imagined i’d confess to you under those circumstances, but i can’t say i mind.”
he giggled, and like that the sweet boy you knew was back, smiling and stretching out his arm for your hand.
you held his for a moment before jumping up at the sound of knocking on the door. you didn’t have to wait long to figure out who it was, kun’s stern tone piercing through the wood, “if you brats are finished, we have some work to do!”
biting back a laugh, you and xiaojun rushed to fix yourselves, him pulling you back by the hand to press his lips to yours. “thank you, noona.” you just smiled.
