I’ve never been in a relationship. I never rlly feel the need or want of one.
Sometimes, more often than I like to admit, it brings me insecurity and uncertainty. Like I’m missing a part of life that everyone is supposed to experience. I feel inadequate.
I know that’s not true. No one is “less than” for not having an S/O.
Still, these insecurities crop up from time to time. But then, I see people talk about their S/O’s and it makes me feel trapped. The entire “they’re my whole world, we’re attached at the hip, they’re my everything” just doesn’t make me feel in awe or romantic like it does for others. It makes me grimace, and imagine the bleak existence, the caged trap, it would be to live like that.
It makes me feel like I’m suffucating.
I’ve had crushes, though they don’t last for very long at all. I’ve wanted a relationship before (that was a strange part of my life), although every aspect of being in a relationship I hate.
Maybe I just haven’t met the right person. Maybe I’m pushing myself towards one way or the other. Maybe I just need to accept my lack of wanting. I’m not sure.
