#laugh rule

goth-catgirl:

prinxe-with-no-crown:

celceta:

I love seasonal fruits they’re like girl we’re back lol

happy pride month

see-arcane:

Sitting here thinking about how Jonathan Harker’s life has boiled down to the most morbidly hilarious chain of, ‘No-you’re-wrong’ hopes and assumptions since he first got on the train. Literally his whole deal is:

Jonathan: This is it, my first real client as an official solicitor. And I get to travel through this beautiful countryside and stay in a castle! This will be so great

Locals at literally every stop of his journey: You go to that castle, you’re worse than dead. Take this paprika and a crucifix. Good fucking luck, buddy

Jonathan: Hm. Bit disconcerting. But I’m sure it’s just superstition talking

Dracula, being Dracula: Actually, no :)

Jonathan: Well, that’s not ideal. Can I leave?

Dracula, forcing him to forge letters and stay another month: Also no :)

Jonathan: Ah. Maybe if I give a letter to the only other living human beings in reach, I can get some help?

Dracula’s buddies handing Dracula the private letter and matches: Nope :)

Jonathan: Alright. Can I at least live?

Dracula, marking a murder calendar for his girlfriends’ blood buffet and stealing Jonathan’s travel kit: Nah :)

Jonathan: Damn. Well, at least once I’m dead I’ll be free of the castle, right?

Dracula’s girlfriends, measuring him for a matching cellar coffin: Ha! You’re so funny and flavorful, bestie :) :) :)

fungiblegoods:

disturbedlolita:

telltaletypist:

kamoi:

natalieironside:

natalieironside:

Steve Harringron in season 1 of Stranger Things is the most character. He did some bad stuff and immediately went “Aw, beans. That wasn’t cool. I better go apologize” at which point The Plot he’d been blissfully unaware of for the entire show immediately tried to eat him.

Steve: “Hey Nancy I wanted to apologize for–”

Nancy, cocking a gun: “Wall’s haunted.”

tiktoksgay:

evilvillain123456789:

[guy whos primary sexual fantasy is being an orca whale in a tank at seaworld that occasionally gets heart-shaped steaks placed into its mouthe by its busty trainer]: Listen,

tikkunolamorgtfo:

jungwildeandfree:

natrasharomanova:

i work at a children’s hospital. as per hospital regulations, all employees have to go through regular fire safety trainings. most of it is pretty standard. and then there’s the Baby Vest.

it looks like this:

it fits six babies. and in the event of a fire we’re literally supposed to just put it on, fill it with babies, and then evacuate the building.

fire alarm (ringing)

me, stuffing babies into my vest: sorry excuse me i have to leave immediately 

ok but shouldn’t it be red

oneheadtoanother:

dragonflea:

guerrillatech:

̸͙̏̋̀B̸͈̪̤̑Ŕ̶̲̍̄Ề̵̡A̷̺͔͋D̶̦͍̔͝ ̶͕̹͚̇́̊Í̸̮S̸̯̿̌̏ ̴̲͓̾B̷͚̂̐̍A̷͚̬̾ͅD̷͔͇͎̐̏ ̷̳̭̒͗F̶̛͇O̷͉͉͐R̵̲̄͋̀ ̶̳͎̊͝O̵̖̥͝U̷̝̗͉̓Ŕ̷̨͔̊̉ ̷̙̫̜̂Ḓ̴̰̝͊̍̆Ḭ̷̧̬̋̏̃G̴̣̮̮̏E̷͈̳̠̎̓S̴̜̐T̴͓͚͋ͅI̷̙͙̚͝͝V̷͍̖̹̇̅̈Ȩ̵̿ ̸͇̔̍S̸̨͖̭͂͂Y̴̱̎̌̾S̸̖̣̊́͑Ṫ̶͎̠̼̔E̶͕̳͋̓M̶͓̼̄͜S̵̰̐̓͗.̸̫̒̂͛ ̶̪͕̥̉͝R̶̟̪̂̀Ẽ̵̗̥ͅP̶̺̏E̴͓͖͆Ń̵̘̯́͘T̸͉̃ ̷̱̔͠Ȧ̵̡̱̼Ṋ̷̔̆D̴̫̰́̈́͜ ̸̘̘̖̓̉͘F̵̢͍̟́E̴̹̪͙̓Ḛ̵̚D̸̰͝ ̶͔͖͈͂̐͗M̶̬̣̓͠Ę̸̋ ̵̧̢̞͒̾͝S̸̫̲̍̅͠E̷͈̓̒̈E̷͖͝D̷̨͕̒̌̈́S̸͎̞̦͂͐ ̴̦͈̬̊̀̆