#laugh tag

kamoi:

I love jaywalking with strangers. They can’t kill all of us!!!

nflstreet:

I’m on the Bond subreddit

swagdaddydong:

snorlaxatives:

tumblr may be a hell site full of nauseating discourse but at least they haven’t integrated a ‘stories’ feature like literally every other social media site

That takes too much knowledge of coding.

shreddedpunkbitch:

ayeleesh:

when you see your reflection on your laptop screen and you just look

at least i’m beautiful in diego luna’s eyes

kandros:

here is a map  of the world of dragon age

here is tht same image, rotated and overlayed with an image of solas and a single cooked shrimp

coincidence???? i think not.. wake up, thedas

ameliahcrowley:

asher-orion-writes:

pinktwink:

cadaverkeys:

Im not American so please forgive me if this comes across as rude but when Americans start a sentence with “during the 2016 killer clown craze-” I can’t help myself. Talked about like it was a force of nature. Said with a nonchalant air like its an inevitable part of growing up. The killer clown craze.

england is literally throwing a celebration for their killer clown rn what are y'all talking about

England also did actually have the killer clown craze too! I don’t know if any of them actually killed but I know people were arrested for dressing up as clowns and jumping out w weapons or some shit like that.

No actual deaths by clown, and the craze died away after a few weeks, but we did have a lot of idiots lurking around with make-up and knives for a while, trying to look creepy, scarring children for life and annoying all the actual clowns I know.

One showed up in the alley next to my house, so, given that our neighbourhood is about eighty percent elderly people, I took to doing nightly clown patrols for a while (literally just doing a circuit of the neighbour, with intent to explain why giving people actual heart attacks isn’t funny).

It was only later that I realised I had been doing so in my cute bat hoody, with the wings and pointed ears, and that dressing up as a bat to hunt for evil clowns was perhaps not the sanest use of my time.

sunfortune:

at least we’ll always have captain america the winter soldier (2014) and also our deep seated rage

roastcookie:

count dracula? uhh, 1 lol

amygdalan-arm:

dude stop telling me to count dracula I only ever see the one

england-nt:

england-nt:

Bayer Leverkusen are playing connect 4 on Twitter with Hull City

We’ve had no football for like 24 hours and we’re all going mad

In case you’re curious, Hull City won

apathbacktoyou:

ober-affen-geil:

captain-price-officially:

[Begin video ID:

Someone driving a car pulls up to a McDonalds drive-thru in Germany. The intercom podium reads “[handwritten script] Wilkommen bei [McDonalds “M”] [typed script] ich liebe es] (translation: Welcome to [McDonalds “M”] I’m loving it)

transcript of conversation:

Driver: Hallo

Employee: Hallo

Driver: Guten Sie English? (Is your English good?)

Employee: Yes

Driver: Stahbiell. Ich bekomm bitte einmal ein Doublepack menu. (Cool. I’ll have a [menu item], please.)

Employee, in heavy German accent: I don’t understand German.

End ID]

The driver says “Können Sie Englisch?” which means “Do you speak Englisch?”

mirkwoodest:

tiktoks-for-tired-tots:

darfichihrenhundstreicheln:

nyabbycat:

vine legends just randomly popping up on tiktok gets me every time

kaijuno: