#niv-mizzet

Chapter One: The Gathering Storm

While we may be in the middle of a story drought, I can at least catch up on a proper online Magic Story! And while I have started War of the Spark: Ravnica, I haven’t finished it yet – it’ll be more of an overall review going over the essentials, tidbits, and oddities. But enough about Greg Weisman – time to see what Django Wexler can do!

• It’s gonna be interesting to see what’s gone over in the prequel, for that is what this is.
• It was autumn in Ravnica, and so it rained, day after day.
• …I have the sneaking suspicion I’m gonna have to set up a Greg Weisman roast jar.
• Compare this to how he started the online story:
  Hekara was waiting for me on the Transguild Promenade.
  All we get is someone called Hekara and a place.
• Django sets us up with a season, and a description. Not just raining, but day after day raining. It’s… dare I say… actual storytelling!
• Okay, I’m gonna try and limit my roasting of Greg Weisman throughout the rest of this. Promise.
• What a descriptive paragraph! The imagery!!! Rain marching down like a conquering army (foreshadowing!), drains vomiting up debris, long-forgotten oceans…! Oh, I missed this sort of writing!
• We’re following Ral for this story! In the neighborhood of Seven Swords, within which lies Frost Lane. Ye who wants to run a D&D Ravnica campaign, take note.
• Upscale shops can afford to have magical lights, but other stores make do with Victorian-era lamps. The Victorian is just a frame of reference for y’all.
• After all, he thought, with grim satisfaction, what’s the point in being a “rain mage” if you have to get wet?
  
• Goddamn I love this! Of course Ral, being a storm mage, can bend rain around him so he stays dry! I love these little uses of magic, like Jace projecting an illusion of alertness around himself when the Gatewatch first met Dovin Baan, or Chandra warming up soup after incinerating Ulamog and Kozilek.
• I love the information we get on Seven Swords. So much of Ravnica’s history has been preoccupied with guild conflict that the source of its name is lost to time – but what we do know is just so informative! It really helps flesh out Ravnica!
• It’s taking a lot of effort to not repost entire paragraphs of the story, let alone the entire thing, but it’s just so goddamn good!
• Well. Ral stared into the darkness, as though force of will could make it give up its secrets.
  
• Of course it won’t, Ral: Force of Will is a counterspell.
  
  *dodges rotten fruit flung in my direction*
  
• Django Wexler where have you been these past few weeks with your beautiful descriptive language?????

• A young woman breaking into Nivix? Who would want to – oh no. Not Rat. Anything but Rat!
• Hey now, Izzet isn’t guarded by madmen with flamethrowers. The Izzet are equal opportunity employers, first of all. Second, they’re flame spouters: the difference is really elementary. In this essay I will attempt to…
• Looks like Bolas is doing some good ol’ fashioned mind-control here! At least, I think that’s who the other scaly slithering mind is. We might get to see the death of Niv-Mizzet!
• I love how the Izzet have all the protection against magic at their disposal, but a person attached to a mundane kite can still slip through!
• Nowhere’s the mastermind of Bolas at work! To be fair, Greg does get into a bit of that in what I’ve read in the novel, but this is just the simple bits all coming together!
• Magical defenses? Just a kite. Air elementals to get it up there of course, nice touch, but diving in is mundane.
• All those alarm systems? Ral made them. And Bolas is blackmailing Ral.
• That vedalken who was replacing Ral for tonight? He just so happened to meet someone at an opera last night (which we get the name of a comedic opera in Ravnica, #worldbuilding), who is now on aforementioned kite about to slip past every defense he knows about when he turns them off.

• We’ve gotten mentions of posters here before, but I wonder how they’re made on Ravnica. Like, is there a printing press? Do magical brushes re-paint images a la Mickey’s Sorcerer’s Apprentice brooms?
• OH SHIT IT’S TEZZY-BOY!!! 
• Okay, Tezzy-boy? Ravnica ain’t a second-rate world. Then again, you’ve been to New Phyrexia, and it is pretty unique, I get it. Also Kaladesh, which I guess is technologically more advanced than Ravnica. If you think about it–
  
• “Yourmastertold me that once already,” Ral said. Tezzeret’s lip twitched, and Ral knew he’d scored.
  
• Getting him where it hurts!
• “As I said, I don’t understand why he extends his mercy, only that it rarely lasts.” Tezzeret pushed himself down from the stage.
  
• “I should know. Brought be back to life. I thought, ‘Huh, nice guy.’ Now I’m left in eternal servitude to him, so grains of salt and all that.” – Tezzy-boy, probably.
  
• Give it a few more pages, Ral: you’ll still only have one arrogant dragon to serve, but it’s not the one you had before.
• Beside him, something was rising out of the dust: a long-limbed, spider-like construct with a single glowing eye on a flexible stalk.
  
• …weird flex, Tezzeret, but okay. Maybe the minion budget is a little tighter than usual with Liliana on the payroll.
• Tezzeret, you fool! Ral is the storm!
• Ral carries a shield. Then again an Izzet gauntlet probably counts as a shield with how big it is. A delicate shield, but a shield nonetheless.
• Actually it’s just an electric shield, we learn later on – which is still impressive.
• Ral also has a trench coat.
• On his back, a bulge beneath his trench coat, was the Mizzium-Ion Electrostatic Accumulator, Mark IV, the very latest from the Laboratory of Storms and Electricity.
  
• Y’know, I should really make an award for Pretentious Titles of Pretentiousness. We don’t see ‘em often, but it’s still fun.
  
• The original long-ago inventor had intended her device to produce harmless entertainment for children’s parties. After the third fried clown, Ral had taken over the project for his own purposes.
  
• I’m giving this a Yes! Yes! Yes! Award, because it’s just hilarious.
• Ral, you’ve been played like a fiddle.

• So our Dimir mind mage knows she’s being controlled, but can’t do anything about it. That must be horrifying – like sleep paralysis except you’re committing a murder.
• Black-market Izzet artificers are a thing.
• This is a very interesting look into Niv-Mizzet’s room. Telescopes, looking outwards; books upon books; little machinery because he does thought-experiments.
• Also, he sleeps like a cat. Very important.
• Oh! We’re getting an important plot point from the novel!
• So y’know the whole Planar Beacon thing? How that was Niv-Mizzet’s idea and Ral built the thing? Yeah, Bolas planted that inside Niv’s head. Stellar move! That’s the mastermind we wanted to see!
• And of course, once you’ve proved your usefulness to Bolas, you’re discarded*
• *unless your name is Sarkhan Vol, which why did you leave him alive once he opened the Eye of Ugin? ‘Cause that led to Sarkhan doing the time-warp and bringing your dead twin back to… well not life, but existence let’s say. The same twin who’s now serving as your jailer. You set yourself up for your own downfall, Bolas.
• This also works in Bolas’ favor: a Dimir agent trying to kill the Izzet Guildmaster further sows dissension among the guilds.

• Viashino are described as dragon-like here. Which… nah, I’m not seeing.
  
• Two uniformed guards there recognized him and cleared the way, and he stalked past them, rain dripping from his coat onto the scarred concrete floor.
  
• “Well of course we let ‘im through! Not like there’s a shapeshifter in charge of a secret spy guild, is there?” – Izzet guard before being fired, probably.
• Elevators in Ravnica were designed by Bogo Sternwhistle, which what a name!
• Also it could probably just be this elevator, I get that, but still…
• Stenorian means loud and powerful.
• “How long have you known?”
  “That you are a Planeswalker? Since you first came here. The signs are not difficult to read, once you know the truth.”
  “Then why pretend ignorance?”
  Niv-Mizzet gave a dry chuckle. “In ten thousand years, I have found no tactic more effective than knowing more than you let on. I had no reason to interrupt your little game. Until now.”
• As funny as this is to think Niv-Mizzet knew about Ral the whole time, I wonder if it’s untrue. Bolas could’ve planted that juicy little tidbit in the agent’s mind, leaving it for Niv-Mizzet to use to gain leverage over Ral. I think it’s something he’d do.
• Yeah, Azor didn’t intend for a planeswalker to become the Living Guildpact. Heck, I don’t think he intended for anyone to become the Living Guildpact.
• Oh right! Remember when Ral Zarek killed Melek, Izzet Paragon, to become the mazerunner for the Izzet? Shame, too: it could’ve been a milestone for weird/elemental representation…
• So here, in short, is “Niv-Mizzet’s” plan:
• 1. Get all 10 guilds to agree.
• 2. Become the Guildpact
• 3. Beat Bolas.
• You can see how well that plan went. But hey, at least he’s fully fine with leaving the Izzet to accomplish this. And giving Ral the position of Guildmaster… how could he refuse?
• Come to think of it, with Ral going after Tezzeret, who is in charge of the Izzet now?
• “Leave the Dimir to me. If Lazav has thrown in his lot with Bolas, then we will simply need to replace him. No doubt one of his lieutenants will be unhappy with his guildmaster’s choice of loyalty.” – Niv-Mizzet
  
• Or her. Etrata’s still with the Dimir.
• Ah yes, the “Backup Plan”. Not Operation Desperation, which is the Backup Backup Plan. No, thisis the thing that Bolas planted in Niv-Mizzet’s mind – the Planar Beacon!

• Ral spikes his hair with elecrticity. Forget about spending hundreds on hair product – use STATIC!
• Ah yes, send letters to the Azorius, where Dovin Baan is working…

Oh my god… that was… THAT WAS AN ACTUAL STORY!!! Not a recap, not a teaser, not a recap – not those little samples in grocery stores to make you buy their product! This was an actual honest-to-gods story!!! And it’s so REFRESHING to read this descriptive language! To see people talking like people instead of what someone presumes to think that kids sound like! To be immersed in a well-loved and well-crafted world!

We got personified rain! Seven Swords! Practical magic! History! Silver Curtains! Rage! Kites! Mind-control! Planning! Comic operas! Security runes! Posters! Tezzy-boy! Insults! Planar ratings! Eye stalks! Mizzium-Ion Electrostatic Accumulator Mk IV! Fried Clowns! Diversions! Telescopes! Books! Adding secrets! Discarding! Incompetent guards! Bogo Sternwhistle! Dragons acting like cats (not to be confused with cat dragons)! Planeswalkers! Knowledge! Changing the Living Guildpact! Backup plans!

And the 2nd chapter’s already been out, and the 3rd got emailed today, so I can’t do a cliffhanger… um…

But will we get story for Core 2020? Stay tuned!