#nonamorous
i dont want a partner, like thats nothing i could really “do” or w/e, but theres some practicality that im missing out on. like, id like to get a hug and watch tv leaning against someone on the couch rn. other times, cooking for 2 is easier and would be nice
I’m reminded every day how little awareness there exists around different aro/ace terms so forgive me if you know this already, OP!
But for those of you feeling like this, feeling like you’re destined to be alone because you don’t fit into the amatonormative relationship structure that society at large and within the queer identities deem “normal”? You’re not. You’ll have friends that will mean more to you than anyone else will ever understand, for one. But you can even have the committed partnership of amatonormative relationships if that’s something you want.
Queerplatonic relationships (sometimes called quasiplatonic relationships when used by het-aligned aros/aces) are committed partnerships founded on trust and platonic feelings, rather than romantic or sexual feelings/attraction like an amatonormative relationship would be. It can look as simple as long-term roommates who start adopting pets together and include each other in their own plans, or as complicated as getting legally married and adopting children together. It involves work and communication like a romantic relationship does, but relationships can be so much more than just romantic.
yeah for sure! but that’s what i meant (tho did not say outright, i didn’t think itd get picked up lol) by partner. if we want to introduce another term (that ive really not heard used as much lately?) im nonamorous. i really like your addition to be clear! a bunch of people have related to this, so the addition may be helpful for some of them? and i had a few thoughts, actually!
a partnership type relationship is different, and id just be going through the motions a bit, not having those other feelings, id treat this hypothetical partner like a friend i cuddle/live/do xyz with (which ig, is my actual goal, living close enough to friends that i can be like “hey im baking and having movie night, anyone want to join?”)
what differentiates a romantic or qpp relationship, from a non-partnered relationship, or friendship? after all, you can kiss, make out, cuddle, go on dates, go to the movies or fancy dinners, give flowers, gifts, pool finances, live together, sleep together (literally or figuratively), etc etc etc with friends. i have and will and want or dont want those activities with friends, but that didnt make them romantic, because there was no romantic feelings, which imo is what makes it a romantic relationship, and same for any sort of partnership. i just dont do those “working together” “on a team” “each other’s” type sentiments?
Oh that’s totally valid too! I literally realized after posting that you mentioned not wanting to be someone’s partner and wondered if I misunderstood what you were saying, but I’d already had it up for like. Half an hour at that point.
QPPs would definitely involve explicit communication about the labels. It would be like the step in a romantic relationship where you ask “what are we? Are we dating? Are we exclusive?” type questions.
Long term roommates is also a goal though, the found family vibes, the co-op/commune energy. Aagh, I also want that. Me and all my close friends living next door to each other so we can easily hang out. I feel like QPP could still be a valid label for that too, like it’s similar to long term dating without living together. Life-long activity partner?
Definition:Someone who, for whatever reason, identifies both as polyamorous and nonamorous.
The colors are blends of thispolyamorous flag and of thisnonamorous flag. Their meanings as a result can incorporate the meanings of their original flags’s colors (at the person’s discretion; the other flags meanings can be found by clicking the links above), and has these additional core meanings:
Dark Navy: Defiance of norms, both within society at large and within the polyamorous and nonamorous communities, with a reminder of those most impacted by breaking those norms
Taupe: Peace of mind and self acceptance
Dandelion: Vibrancy and resilience
Slate: Embracing freedom and the pursuit of what we independently value
