Gained weight cuz of the antidepressants I’m taking which aren’t even doing anything and now my jeans I bought 6 months ago no longer fit and I feel pretty awful about my body right now so fun fun fun
Hey folks, remember me? I was a frighteningly frequent flier here up until about 6 months ago. Then I kinda dropped off. A little at a time. Slowly, week after week until I only checked in once a week, if that.
Click here (if it works) to read on… jk it didn’t work. SURPRISE!
I thought it was me trying to live life irl, right? I went on a couple dates, met some losers, met some okay—ers. Met a good one, turtling our way through life .
Anywhooo, 2021 has been a shit show, amiright? No like really bad, for me it was a challenge from the beginning, more so than the year that shall not be named.
Again, I’m noticing more and more my life didn’t revolve around Tumblr. I haven’t written anything since January. I thought maybe it was because the finale hit me so hard and I miss our boys so damn much.
I feel like I am letting my amazing collab ladies down. I feel like I am letting all of YOU down. You amazing, sparkling joyous people that keep reading my stuff. That keep coming back even when I am not present.
I’ve gone through a bit of a metamorphosis in last few months. Well this year, as shitty as it has been, has taught me a lot. And I am a better person for it.
So why am I here now talking to all of you? I figured it out. Why am I have been absent. Up until last November, coincidentally right about finale time, I quit smoking for probably the hundredth time. But it just dawned on me this week that when I was stressed I smoked. When I was upset, drunk, awake, tired, caffeinated, crabby, happy…well you get the idea. I smoked a lot. And when I smoked, I read y’all’s fan fiction. I knew I had to change my habits, I just didn’t correlate it until now.
I am sorry for not being around, for ghosting everyone. I am not sorry for the reasons why, but you know what I mean.
Thank you to the people, my tribe, that has been there through the last several months and has gotten me through more crap than I thought I could handle. Thank you to those that have messaged me and checked up. Thank you to those that didn’t notice, because (hopefully) there was enough content here for you to consume. Thank you for reading.
I am enjoying taking my time enjoying life. Turtling if you will and trying to navigate what a new relationship looks like as I near my upper 40’s, and as a single mom, and as I strive to become my genuine self. I am embracing myself wholly. I even stopped coloring my hair. It is liberating. Stay tuned for that story another time.
Thank you my loves. Thank you Tribe. I hope to see you soon.
do you ever have a day so crappy that you reach that point where you randomly go out loud to yourself like “wait, THIS is the bad place!” or is that just me?
It’s been 5 years since the finale and I’m still absolutely raging that Dan turned out to be Gossip Girl and despite him never accepting Serena, cheating on her with Georgina, dating her best friend, writing a satire about her, AND being Gossip Girl so he could ‘get into her world’ which he always judged her for, she still married him instead of ending up with Nate.
so i just finished rewatching gossip girl for the first time and i remembered that when i used to see the ‘d*n is the worst’ memes i was like he’s not THAT bad but now rewatching he IS the WORST. they should’ve killed him on the season finale
