I realized that I have friends on here that aren’t on other platforms.
Dakota died yesterday. he colicked, but the impaction was probably from tumors he had that seemed to have spread into his abdomen. the vet came in the morning and gave him fluids and pain meds, and even tho the prognosis was poor she said to give him the rest of the day and see. he died about 4 hours later, next to his favorite scratching tree. i held his head and talked to him and kissed him in his last moments. it wasn’t peaceful, it was scary and traumatic and even with earlier pain meds probably painful, and i feel so terrible about that. i didn’t want his last day to be his worst day, and it was, by far. but i was there with him, and even tho his final moments were bad, i was the last thing he saw and heard and smelled. i comforted him as best i could. i watched the life leave his eyes.
i cleaned his feet and held them one last time. they were the feet i learn to trim on. i brushed his mane and tail and cut a little bit of each to keep, as well as some of his fur. i kissed his bad knee, the one everyone thought would be his eventual downfall, and thanked it for carrying him and never failing. we buried him with a branch from his scratching tree, some redbud and dogwood flowers, and a small purple flower that david found. i wrote him a note that i tucked into his halter and put a picture of him from this past winter in there too.
i sat on his mound of dirt until the sun set.
i had him for 18 years. he was two months shy of 36.
Princess is being medicated to help ease her symptoms and pain. She’s still gonna pass soon, idk HOW soon but. The meds are helping a lot with symptoms, at least! She’s visibly way more happy and energetic than she was last week, her sinus drainage has all but stopped whereas it was overwhelming her before, and she’s eating!
I’m just glad to have a little more time to like. Plan, spoil her, process all this. I’d hate for her to go while still choking on snot and boogers, so I’m glad that eased off. There’s been too many times in my past where we had to put an animal down on the spot and I was so afraid of that, especially since Bambi was at work :(
She’s on strong pain killers and CBD as well as a steroid and something else for infection so hopefully she’s not miserable!!!
