about a week ago i had to say goodbye to Bowie, my best friend of 14 years. i don’t think there’s any way i can properly convey how much this little guy means to me and how extraordinary he was, but i did my best to do him justice here.
for a purebred cat, bowie was INCREDIBLY strong. he played and caused trouble all the way till the end, even after 4 years of battling kidney disease and one major emergency surgery. i miss his opinionated little ass so so much but i’m so, so glad i could give him the long, spoiled life he deserved.
i know you know it already but i love you so much bud, hopefully i’ll see you again someday and i can kiss your little forehead
A sad update, I’m afraid: Prue passed this morning. I was able to hold her until the end, although I think that comforted me more than her. While we had hopes that chemo would work on the lymphoma, the tumor was too aggressive (we didn’t even really get to start the chemo). She declined extremely quickly over the past 4 days, and her heart gave out this morning.
Above is the last pic I actually took of her, back on the 14th, when she was a little more perky. When she wanted scritches she would come up on my computer desk, and just slowly but insistently nudge her way into my space, and head-bonk my arm. If I made room she liked to sit in my lap for a short time.
I am a big believer in the idea of always trying to make some time to give pets attention, especially when they ask for it. Because you never know when your time with them will be over, so you don’t want to waste any of it.
Her sister Piper has been very stressed the past month too, sensing something was wrong, and reacting with hostility. I hope at least that she will be less stressed now. And honestly I am glad that Prue is not suffering any more; I had my doubts about putting her through chemo, but would have tried it if the vets thought there was a good chance of her recovering. Alas.
Thank you so much to everyone who has passed on good wishes and thoughts. I appreciate it. I’m still working on commissions, and will probably take some more because there were a lot of emergency room visits over the past week. :(
I know it has been a while since our last post here and I am sorry this couldn’t be a happier one to come back. My heart breaks while writing this.
We had to say goodbye to our big beautiful boy Blake this Friday. It was his 11.5th birthday and just one day shy of his 11 year anniversary of meeting Sambucca, the love of his life.
He was completely fine last Saturday and Sunday morning he suddenly spiraled into great suffering. We reacted immediately and tried absolutely everything in our power to help him and find the cause. Over the course of the week we went to 2 different ERs, a vet and a neurology specialist. He was being monitored 24/7, he had an IV, we had a catheter installed and a feeding tube. We got his blood work done, x-rays, ultrasound… even an MRI and a spinal tap. And yet, frustratingly no definitive diagnosis could be made.
However looking at his symptoms and the lack of indicators in almost anything else, we are fairly certain it was a neurological issue. Most likely a very aggressive, fast growing cancerous brain tumor that probably caused an unwitnessed seizure, from which he never really recovered. If it really was a tumor, we could tell from the MRI that it would not have been operable. The treatments we could do didn’t show any improvement and radiation or chemo-therapy wouldn’t have made any sense.
There was nothing else we could do for him and while we managed to stabilize him so he’d be more comfortable, he wouldn’t and couldn’t get better on his own. So we made the hardest decision of my life, to release him so he could rest in peace.
He was so weak that I was terrified of losing him, when he’d be all alone in a foreign, sterile place, surrounded by barking dogs and other animals that were fighting their own painful battles. I kept sending him good energy and strength from afar, telling him that we would come and be with him as soon as we could. And he was very brave and strong and held on. We had a warm, nice and quiet room all to ourselves and we could bring Sambucca and Faolan to be with him as well. He looked really good, much better than he had all week. He was awake and aware, and the doctors did a great job making him as comfortable as he could be. Blake was so happy to see us and was purring softly in our arms. We thanked him for all the joy and memories he had brought us in all those years together (he’s been with me for a third of my life) and told him how much we loved him.
He fell asleep peacefully on our laps within seconds.
I am so thankful he gave us these last moments together. We will always love him and carry him in our hearts. The apartment seems so empty and quiet without his big fluffy presence, but I hope he’s watching over us and maybe his spirit will come and visit us from time to time.
Currently volunteering a 3hr shift to the Pet Loss Support Hotline at MSU CVM. I am a firm believer that our ‘pets’ are a part of our family and if you are grieving, struggling to cope with their loss, then there should be someone there to help you. Tonight, that might be me!
If you or anyone you know is struggling with the loss of a pet and feels like they need someone to talk to, there are options!
The Listening Ear 24-hour Crisis Hotline: (517) 337-1717
The Iams Pet Loss Support Resource Center: (888) 332 7738 [M-F 8-5]
WSU Hotline: (886) 266-8635
Until April 20th, 2017 MSU Pet Loss Support Hotline: (517) 432-2696 6:30 pm - 9:30 pm EST [T,W,Th]
Charlie began to deteriorate a few days ago, and this afternoon he was put to sleep. It was time, and he went very peacefully, in my arms and with his family around him.
I will miss my fat, grumpy, fluffy boy so much. I would have done almost anything to have longer with him, but I couldn’t let him suffer when we knew there was no longer any hope. At least, although he was neglected and badly treated as a kitten, I was able to rescue him and give him nearly eight years of love, security, and happiness.
Thank you so much to everyone who donated money for his care, or sent me well-wishes and kind words. In such a difficult time, the kindness of strangers has meant so much to all of us, and we are beyond grateful.
In just a couple hours Mom and I are going to have to say goodbye to these two fuzzballs. Dax is old, has chronic pain and a chronic UTI that won’t respond to medication. Oscar was diagnosed with FIP last year and it’s a miracle he’s made it this long. But his FIP has made a nasty comeback and medicine isn’t helping at all. They’re both very weak and I know this is the best decision for them. I’m gonna miss my little Black Bean dearly and I know Mom will miss her Dax cat. I’m trying not to get too worked up about it because they’ve both been miserable and I know it will be a relief for them both. It still doesn’t make it any easier….
IF I COULD SPEAK TO A DYING DOG I WOULD TELL THEM HEAVEN IS REAL. I WOULD HOLD THEIR LITTLE HEAD AND WHISPER THAT HEAVEN IS FULL OF RIB EYE STEAKS AND BUCKWHEAT FIELDS AND SO MANY RABBITS TO CHASE.
I WOULD TELL THEM IT WON’T HURT. I WOULD TELL THEM ITS LIKE FALLING ASLEEP. I WOULD WRAP THEIR BODY IN A WARM TOWEL AND SAY “GO ON AHEAD, I WILL MEET YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE.”
You can talk to a dying dog. They may not understand your words but they understand your heart.
They hear that they have been a Good Dog and they know they are So Loved. They know that you are sad and do their best to comfort you because they do not understand why you are sad, they are right here.
They understand that there is food and people who love them.
They understand they have been promised rabbits to chase.
They know heaven is real. They have been living here. But now they have to sleep.
My rescue parakeet Regi I’ve had for almost 4 years and cared for his special needs since passed away today. I hope I have him a good last couple years… rip Regi.
I haven’t posted on here in a while, but I wanted to let you all know that Stitch passed away unexpectedly on May 8th. He was cremated and I brought his ashes home today. He was 10 and lived a long bunny life. Rest In peace my sweet boy. This is one of the last pics I took of him. I appreciate you all ❤️
Hey everyone, I’ve got a sad update about Demo, the injured russian dwarf I rescued last week.
After having a course of drops to take her eyelid swelling down, the vet was able to have a much better look at the inside of her eye, and it was an absolute mess in there. There wasn’t an eyeball to save, just a horribly injury. It looks like her previous owners lied about how she ended up like this and it was trauma that caused it.
Due to the pain she was in, only options were to put her to sleep, or to have an operation to fully remove the eye, which was risky. I gave her the chance to live and today the operation went ahead. Unfortunately, towards the end of the op, she stopped breathing, and although the vets were amazing and spent a long time trying to revive her, it wasn’t to be and she passed away.
I’m heartbroken. She hadn’t even been with us a full week yet and I already adored her, for how sweet and friendly she was, despite her pain. Her life was so short and it’s so unfair. I hope she enjoyed her last days of being pampered and loved.
Hey everyone, sorry for leaving this blog abandoned for so long!
I’ve got the sad task of letting you all know that Popcorn passed away last week. She was suffering with Pyometra and rather than let her struggle on in lots of pain we made the decision to put her to sleep. She was about 2 and a half.
I always regret not posting more about her on here, but she was a very independent hamster who didn’t particularly enjoy being handled or having photos taken, unlike the budgies who love being the centre of attention.
I didn’t think we were going to get another hamster, but being a softie for animals who need new homes I did a bit of searching around and found a little Roborovski hamster. He’s called Nano and is super cute. He’s still settling in, and seems very surprised by how big his new cage is. He’s never had a proper wheel before, just a flying saucer type, so he’s been thoroughly enjoying his new silent spinner. Once he’s more comfortable with my presence I’ll upload a photo for you all.
(I hope I’ve tagged this well enough so that I don’t upset anyone with this post)
It’s cute that my post about my cat, Stanley is still getting notes. My beloved boy did end up passing away about 2 weeks after his birthday. It’s nice that people are still enjoying his existence and memory. It makes me smile to see people still liking it.
……………………today i learned that because cancer is just your own cells going rogue, that the viral cancer dogs can spread to one another is actually a breed of dog; it is the only surviving member of its dog breed. Even though it is a viral cancer, its dna is 100% dog and the breed it came from is now extinct.
there is an asexually reproducing immortal breed of dog that behaves like a virus
a breed of dog that is a malicious disease that targets other dogs…..
Yeah canine transmissible venerial tumour is one of my favourite bits of Weird Biology because it’s like, 1: it’s basically an Immortal Dog and 2: this is a full on tetrapod vertebrate that has moved life history from barking, running animal to essentially a colonial, single/multi celled parasite. This is a mammal that has turned into an obligate parasite.
So, Fishblr friends, I have some happy news and some sad news. The happy news, first, you might have guessed - I welcomed a new friend into the tank! The little white telescope butterflytail is Snow Pea. I picked her up the same day I picked up my new tank stand; she was so active and friendly, and I couldn’t leave without her :) She’s been a great addition to the tank and everyone loves her!
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Now, for the sad news. I held off posting here for the past few days since I knew how this was going to end. This morning I said goodbye to my goofy little pom-pom Chai. She developed dropsy out of nowhere about a week and a half ago. Knowing that dropsy is not something fish generally rebound from, I was worried. I treated the tank immediately with my usual meds (these will not affect the bacteria in the filter btw) and kept a close eye on her. She didn’t seem to be getting worse and had only slightly pineconed up until yesterday. I did not remove her from the main tank, as dropsy is not usually contagious unless it’s the result of a bacterial outbreak and I did not suspect that here. Only Chai was being affected, and she was still very active, eating normally, etc. I didn’t think it would be right to isolate her when I knew she had basically no chance of recovery in the event this was renal failure (I highly suspected it was). She would have deteriorated quickly in isolation, and spent her last days alone. I didn’t want that for her. The other fish were not picking on her, and she was not struggling in the main tank. I wanted her to spend her remaining time with her friends in the place she has always known…since I didn’t exactly know how many days she would ultimately have left. My criteria for determining whether it was “time,” were: whether she was responsive, eating, active, moving without too much struggle, and no external sores or lacerations. Last night, she was hungry but couldn’t chew. She had trouble maintaining equilibrium. The other fish were very obviously giving her space and leaving her alone. I knew this morning was going to be her time…and I am glad I didn’t wait any longer. After she was gone it was apparent how much fluid was filling her abdomen. She would have been in a lot of pain soon. I think I made the right choice.
I will miss her. A lot. She was the last of my fish from Boston, and she made it through so many crazy times. She almost died in transit - twice! She came to me from Dandy Orandas…so I have no idea how old she really was. She spent 4 and a half years with me, and was from China before that. When I got her, she was only a little smaller than she was today. I estimate she was at least 6 years old, but she may have been as old as 8. I loved her so much and today has been sad missing her in the tank. But I also know she’s not in pain anymore, and somewhere out there she’s swimming around with Mr. B and having all the best fishy snacks she can dream up!
Thanks for reading <3 I have a few more photos of her from a recent shoot, before she got sick, that I’ll post in the coming weeks.
Hi all. Here’s a little thing I made, and feel a little weird about posting…I can’t afford to lay Mr. B to rest as I’d like to, and the only option besides cremation (unfortunately, based on where I am) is throwing him in the dumpster. I really, really don’t want to have to do that. But with moving costs to pay back and an unexpected issue I’ve been avoiding fixing with my car, I don’t have money to spare for “extras” and this is an “extra”…
Thank you for any help at all. I’ve never done one of these before, so I don’t know how long it will take to raise what I’ll need - or if I’ll even get there! But even part of the way there is closer than I can get doing it alone. Share, and help if you can. If you can’t, that’s ok too, kind words are also welcome. I’ll figure it out somehow <3
Hi, followers. I wanted to check in and let you guys know that I made it to California, and am in the process of setting up my new tank (a 55gal acrylic! should be a beauty) so pictures will resume soon! This will be a longer text post, so be warned…
It’s with a very heavy heart that I also must let you know on the trip from Colorado - where my fish were staying with my good friend Emily (philly_goldies) - to LA, I lost both Marshmallow and Mr. B. I was (and still am) pretty crushed by both losses. Thankfully, the friend I drove cross-country with is also a member of the goldfish community, so she was there to comfort me as I cried watching Mr. B take his last breaths. I lost Marshmallow first - she didn’t look right when I left Colorado, and I’m not sure when she passed as I discovered that she’d died only after we arrived at our stopping point that night in Utah. Mr. B was still doing ok, though a little stressed, so I pushed through and rebagged both him and Chai in clean water for the next leg of the trip (Salina –> Vegas). If anything, I expected that Chai might not make it since she was barely breathing and side-sitting.
Marshmallow was given a “burial at sea” - suggested by Dana - and we pushed on through Utah with little issue. We never left the car in the sun for too long, because my two cats were also in the car. We got to Vegas in good time, unloaded everything, and I go to check on the fish. Chai looks awful, like she’s not going to make it, so I immediately get her into clean water. I paid attention to her first since she’d been doing so badly the previous day. Mr. B looks ok from what I can see, but I quickly notice after I change his water that he’s not moving one side of his body (for reference - I packed the fish as if I were shipping them in Kordon bags, separated by layers of filter floss in a small cooler that sat on top of the center console in my car, bungeed to the seat backs so it wouldn’t move; at night I would put the fish in tupperware containers with new water, so they could have more space and air circulation). I try to add more prime, cool him down, nothing works. All I can really do is sit there and watch him die. Thankfully, he was almost gone, so I don’t think he suffered much. Of course I just sat there and kinda lost it, I started crying holding his little tupperware. I’ve had this fish for 5 years - he was older than my cats! More than anything I wanted him to make it and it seemed like he was going to…until he didn’t. I kept thinking I should have left him in Colorado - this was all my fault, the stress was too much, etc. - Dana was there to offer hugs (then we had to go to dinner…I felt bad because I made us a little late for the reservation) and make me feel better as best she could. She helped me realize that if two fish had died on the trip with me, where they weren’t being bounced around or anything, they would definitely have died in the mail. I chose the kindest option I could, to give them the best chance.
I found a portable air pump in my car that I hadn’t used for years, and got batteries so I could hook it up in Chai’s tupperware. There wasn’t much else I could do, but I felt like I had to fight for this one last fish to make it. I bagged up Mr. B and put him in the hotel freezer - he’s in my freezer now, at my new place, until I figure out what I’m doing with him. He was really special to me, so I was thinking maybe I would have him cremated. Oddly, the thing that most put me at ease after his death - made me feel less guilty, and better overall - was my friend back in Boston who said a prayer for him and Marshmallow to St. Francis - patron saint of animals - for safe guidance into the hereafter. I’m not religious (though I do have a theology master’s! lol) but for some reason that made me feel 100% better. Whatever works, right?
Anyway, there is a happy ending to all of this: Chai made it to Los Angeles with me! She was not doing great when I unloaded her here and to be honest, I didn’t have high hopes she was going to make it. But she rallied, and is doing just fine now. This fish has been through some shit lol…she arrived at Emily’s almost dead because the seam broke in her Kordon bag, and she had no water left to breathe in. SOMEHOW she lived through that, and a trip from Colorado to California where two of her tankmates died. Her pompoms are pretty big and I’ll need to trim them soon (they interfere with her eating), but I’m waiting to let her recover from moving stress first. One thing at a time.
Of course, the fucking snail made it from Boston to LA with ZERO ISSUES and no water changes. I feel like it survived out of spite but whatever, it’s going into the new tank, too.
And for a last little note…I went to a local fish store to buy some supplies the other day, and picked up my acrylic tank - the owner gave me a great deal on LED lights since I was buying a tank, too. I couldn’t help but take a look at the goldfish tanks…and my heart may have been stolen by two little babies who have yet to be named :) Pics to come soon! As always, thanks for your love and support, guys!
My cat was put to sleep on Monday. I was woken up when my mum needed someone to hold onto him so she could use her hands she found him crying in the bathroom unable to support himself. Less than an house later he had a seizure that lasted 30 minutes and he was completely unresponsive after that right up until the end. The vets were amazing I really didn’t expect them to let us in with the pandemic but they were lovely and let us hold him.
He is now burried in our garden behind a bench under a privet hedge arch.
I feel incredibly guilty for how he went, he has been struggling for months and I’m not sure he has been all there for a long time but my parents never listened and never took him to the vets despite him being in pain and clearly struggling. I know part of the reason was they were scared he wouldn’t come back if he went but I feel like I should have pushed harder. He should have had a peaceful end, which isn’t what he got.
He was an incredibly special cat and will be dearly missed. Please enjoy the video of him playing his favourite game with the tap. My mum was less impressed by the cat being on the counter .
I realized that I have friends on here that aren’t on other platforms.
Dakota died yesterday. he colicked, but the impaction was probably from tumors he had that seemed to have spread into his abdomen. the vet came in the morning and gave him fluids and pain meds, and even tho the prognosis was poor she said to give him the rest of the day and see. he died about 4 hours later, next to his favorite scratching tree. i held his head and talked to him and kissed him in his last moments. it wasn’t peaceful, it was scary and traumatic and even with earlier pain meds probably painful, and i feel so terrible about that. i didn’t want his last day to be his worst day, and it was, by far. but i was there with him, and even tho his final moments were bad, i was the last thing he saw and heard and smelled. i comforted him as best i could. i watched the life leave his eyes.
i cleaned his feet and held them one last time. they were the feet i learn to trim on. i brushed his mane and tail and cut a little bit of each to keep, as well as some of his fur. i kissed his bad knee, the one everyone thought would be his eventual downfall, and thanked it for carrying him and never failing. we buried him with a branch from his scratching tree, some redbud and dogwood flowers, and a small purple flower that david found. i wrote him a note that i tucked into his halter and put a picture of him from this past winter in there too.
i sat on his mound of dirt until the sun set.
i had him for 18 years. he was two months shy of 36.
For my dear friend Squeaker ( holdmyhat ). Freelance was a joy on my dash and I am so sad to hear that he passed away. I have both of you in my thoughts.
Princess is being medicated to help ease her symptoms and pain. She’s still gonna pass soon, idk HOW soon but. The meds are helping a lot with symptoms, at least! She’s visibly way more happy and energetic than she was last week, her sinus drainage has all but stopped whereas it was overwhelming her before, and she’s eating!
I’m just glad to have a little more time to like. Plan, spoil her, process all this. I’d hate for her to go while still choking on snot and boogers, so I’m glad that eased off. There’s been too many times in my past where we had to put an animal down on the spot and I was so afraid of that, especially since Bambi was at work :(
She’s on strong pain killers and CBD as well as a steroid and something else for infection so hopefully she’s not miserable!!!
Y’all I am not having a good night. I lost my 15 year old cat from childhood two days ago and everytime I close my eyes to try and go to sleep I just keep seeing the whole process of him being put down over and over in my mind. It’s like my mind is on a constant loop of seeing the life go out in his eyes and then seeing his limp body just laying there. I’m so glad I was able to be there for him in his last moments but this fucking sucks and I miss him so much.
Rest in peace, Agoutimoon. January 2019 - March 24th, 2020 I’m so sad to have this sweetheart cross the rainbow bridge at such a young age but the cancer was wrecking her little body so much that it was the kindest thing to do. She will be missed very much.
