#safe for ace
This is a post about vocabulary within the Aromantic Community in relation to Platonic and Aplatonic Spectrum and Terminology that a subset of the Aro-spec community uses.
(I’ve opted not to use a read more to ensure this information isn’t hosted solely on this blog so it will remain in case anything happens to this blog. I did my best to get feedback from others within the aro community regarding these terms and definition so that everyone’s needs are met. Hopefully this will help with the wave of attempting to reclaim aro-spec language.)
Note on the Aplatonic terms: the aplatonic term is used mostly by neurodivergent (ND) aros or those who have been through trauma. But it is not exclusive. Furthermore, the vocabulary associated with platonic attraction and relationships are terms sourced within the aromantic community. They are terms created by and for the aromantic community, although we welcome anyone who finds them useful, any use of them needs to respect that origin and use.
Centering and prioritization of platonic attraction and relationships: while platonic attraction and relationships are not inherently queer, lgbt+, or mogai, the act of centering and prioritizing platonic relationships is inherently challenging the amatonormativity of society and tied to the aromantic existence. As such choosing to center the platonic orientation and relationships is queer, lgbt+, mogai.
Types of Attraction: (some definitions pulled from x)
Sexual attraction: attraction that makes people desire sexual contact or shows sexual interest in another person(s).
Romantic attraction: attraction that makes people desire romantic contact or interaction with another person or persons.
Aesthetic attraction: attraction that appreciates the appearance or beauty of another person(s), disconnected from sexual or romantic attraction.
Sensual attraction: the desire to interact with others in a tactile, non-sexual way, such as through hugging or cuddling.
Platonic attraction: The desire to have a platonic relationship with a specific person.
Alterous attraction: A sort of gray area between platonic and romantic attraction. It’s defined as wanting emotional closeness without necessarily being (at all or entirely) platonic &/or romantic.
Queerplatonic/Quasiplatonic Attraction: A kind of platonic attraction that is not romantic but goes beyond the level of commitment and intimacy that is socially expected of friendship.
Note: All types of attraction can be combined with the various prefixes to form an orientation label to reflect the types of attraction that are important to the individual. Examples: aplatonic, panalterous, heterosexual, homoromantic, bisensual, demiaesthetic
Repulsed/Averse/Indifferent/Neutral/Favorable: The axis of which a person feels comfortable with the type of attraction in general being displayed or directed to them.
Examples:
Platonic Repulsed: A person who is uncomfortable or repulsed by platonic intimacy or displays of affections
Romance Repulsed: A person who is uncomfortable or repulsed by romance or displays of romantic affectionsNegative/Positive: The axis on which a person feels a person should be allowed to experience and express their own relationship to a specific type of attraction
Example:
Sex-Positive: A political stance that believes people should be free to have the relationship to sex that works best for them, and that nobody should be shamed for having or not having sex.
Sex-Negative: A political stance that believes in the social control of how people should relate to sex.
Aro-Spec Relationship Terms:
Queerplatonic/Quasiplatonic Relationship (QPR): A committed relationship that is not based on romantic attraction but goes beyond the level of commitment and intimacy that is socially expected as friendship.
note on platonic and queerplatonic relationships: They may be based on any kind of attraction that is not romantic in nature. Which can include any combination of: sexual, sensual, aesthetic, alterous, emotional, queerplatonic, or platonic attraction. They may also be based on factors other than attraction (instead of or in addition to) or be entered into without attraction.
Nonamory: a lifestyle choice or relationship style that does not include intimate, long-term partnerships, whether romantic or platonic.(Coined here x)
Non-QP, a-QPR or a-queerplatonic: a person who does not feel queerplatonic attraction or desire a queerplatonic relationship.
Analterous: A person who does not feel or experience alterous attraction or bonds.
Aplatonic: A person who does not feel or experience platonic attraction or bonds.
Platonic Spectrum Terms:
Aplatonic: Does not experience platonic attraction or form platonic bonds (ie: friendship).
Grayplatonic: Only experiences platonic attraction or forms platonic bonds rarely or under specific circumstances.
Alloplatonic: Experiences platonic attraction and forms platonic bonds in line with societal expectations.
___platonic: (panplatonic, biplatonic, homoplatonic, heteroplatonic) A label for a person who prioritizes their platonic relationships and uses it as their orientation label. Generally an aromantic community term.
Personal Feelings Towards Platonic Intimacy and Affection (Independent of Platonic Orientation)
Platonic Repulsed: A person who is uncomfortable or repulsed by platonic intimacy or affection.
Platonic Adverse: A person who is uncomfortable or averse to platonic intimacy or affection.
Platonic Neutral: A person who feels neutral to platonic intimacy or affection.
Platonic Indifferent: A person who feels indifferent to platonic intimacy or affection.
Platonic Favorable: A person who feels favorable (likes) platonic intimacy or affection.
Personal Feelings Towards the Value of Platonic Attraction and Relationships
Platonic Positive: An ideological stance that people should not be shamed for not feeling platonic attraction, or for prioritizing their platonic attraction.
Platonic Negative: People who devalue platonic relationships (and devalue those who prioritize their platonic relationships) or who shame those who don’t experience platonic attraction or who center is.
