#sertraline

He dejado de llorar, de sentir esa tristeza que antes me causaba tu ausencia. He recurrido a los antidepresivos, aún se siente un vacío pero ya no duele.

NSFW // Jesus Christ, ever since sertraline made me completely anorgasmic and physically numb during sex, my libido has somehow skyrocketed like never in my life? The frustration of not being able to get any satisfaction from sex mixed with a crazy sex drive mixed with a partner who’s really turned off by my numbness and says I feel like he’s fucking a corpse, it’s just? Hell? I hate it? I haven’t gotten laid in a month but I’m obsessively thinking about it every day all the time? My paranoia thinks my partner is hooking up with every female friend he has and I feel very stupid for this jealousy I never had before… I prided myself on not being a jealous girlfriend all my life.

So far I’ve managed to channel the frustration into sewing lingerie but I’m gonna go insane if this goes on for too long. And I don’t want to switch meds because this has been the best thing I tried so far…

Current status, three weeks on 100mg Sertraline: depression slightly improved, self-destructive urges got worse, eating disorder at an all time low point, currently not hallucinating, usual religious “delusions” still present. No side effects to speak of other than hella anorgasmia and numbness during sex.