“I’m gonna build an empire, and it’s lonely at the top. But madness and greatness can both share a face, and nobody will ever convince me to stop. Try to find a chain that I won’t break, a price I won’t pay for what I want.”
- Empire - Beth Crowley
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* Volume 13 _ e m o t i o n a l
I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. Maybe if I act like I didn’t hear him, he would go away. I don’t know who just called my fucking name but I’m a nervous wreck and in no mood to socialize. My brain wasn’t able to put the voice to a face in its current state, but what if it’s one of the hazers? My heart raced at the thought. What if it’s Prem coming to yell at me? Or Knot? Oh god.
“Hey,” the voice softened and a hand rested on my shoulder, gently tugging me around. My eyes slid open, meeting Yacht’s as he looked at me with concern. Seeing his warm eyes sent a fresh round of emotion through my and tears welled up in my eyes, sliding down my cheeks before I even registered them. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. Come here.” He tugged me into his arms, holding me against his chest.
I couldn’t control myself, my hands gripping his white shirt, not even caring that I was getting blood on it. I sobbed into his chest, letting go of all the stress I had been holding onto since the day my mom died.
“It’s okay,” Yacht told me soothingly, rubbing his hand up and down my back as he held me. “It’ll be okay, just let it out.”
“I-I’m s-s-sorry,” I sobbed, clutching his shirt tighter.
“Don’t apologize,” he told me softly, gently guiding me over to a nearby bench before settling us both down. “Do you want to talk about it?”
I shook my head no. As upset as I am, I know I could never get the words out or form them properly. I’d just be a stuttering mess, way worse than I normally am.
“It’s alright,” he told me softly, “you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but I’m here if you need me. I’m your upperclassman, it’s my job to look after you. Don’t feel guilty.”
I nodded, closing my eyes as I slowly started to relax in his grip. I hated being touched, but he was warm and comforting and I felt safe, as if everything was really going to be okay.
I don’t know how long we sat there, but my body was starting to get sore from lack of movement so I assumed it must have been a while. I forced myself to sit up, rubbing at my eyes which I’m sure were red and puffy. “I-I’m s-sorry a-about your… your s-shirt…”
“I’m more worried about your hands,” he told me, taking me by the wrist to inspect my palms. The wounds had stopped bleeding, leaving behind dried blood across my skin around the half-moon cuts. My nails weren’t long or sharp by any means, mainly because I’m always biting them when I get nervous, which means I was really clenching my fists. “We need to get you to the nurse to disinfect them.”
“D-Do I h-have to?”
“Yes,” he gave me a serious look as he stood up, pulling me with him. “Come on, I’ll go with you so you don’t have to talk to anyone.”
I nodded, allowing him to lead me toward the nurse’s office.
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I stared at my phone, looking at the last message I had sent to BB detailing my blowup toward Prem and my break down to Yacht, along with a few minor details such as the basketball game, the cheering, and the fact that Kong was now paying for me to eat. He hadn’t responded, not that I expected him to, I know just how busy he is.
I’ve been avoiding pretty much everyone since yesterday’s events, despite their various calls and text messages. The only person I’ve replied to is Yacht when he messaged me this morning asking if I was okay. Both of my hands were bandaged and sore, my eyes were still puffy and heavy and, honestly, I just wanted to crawl back into bed and forget about everything.
But I knew I couldn’t avoid everyone forever. That would be too good, and I don’t have that kind of luck in my life.
I stopped in front of the classroom door, taking a deep breath as I clutched the strap of my bag. I really didn’t want to face everyone. Maybe I should just skip, it’s not like my grades matter anyway. Anong will make sure I pass even if I fail, so what’s the point? But… I miss my friends. It’s only been half a day and I already feel so lonely.
A hand rested on my shoulder and I jumped in surprise, spinning around with wide eyes, my hand over my racing heart. “Shit…”
“Sorry,” M apologized, his hand dropping to his side. He shifted his weight, seeming to think something over before he finally spoke up. I was afraid he was going to ask me if I was okay or what happened, but he didn’t. “The teacher will be mad if we’re late again. We should go in.”
I released the breath I didn’t realize I was holding and nodded, motioning toward the door so he could go first. When we stepped inside, everyone looked up at us but they quickly dropped their gazes in disinterest. Had they not heard about what happened? Or did they really not care? I followed M toward his desk, hesitating. Should I sit with them or go back to my original desk?
Oak grinned at me, patting the desk beside his. “It’s about time. I was worried you weren’t gonna show.”
Kong sent him a look before turning to me with a soft smile. I tried to return it, but I’m sure it was more of a grimace than anything. I settled down in the seat beside Oak, trying not to keep my mind blank.
“Don’t forget,” M commented as he leaned forward to see me, “we have cheer practice this afternoon. You’re going with me, right?”
“Who is leading it?” I questioned softly.
“The second years,” Kong answered.
I hesitated before nodding. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”
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When it came time for cheer practice, I hesitated, really not in the mood for the activity, but I didn’t want to let Yacht down, especially after everything he had done for me. I changed quickly, out of the room before anyone else and on my way to the field where practice was going to be held. The second years were already there waiting.
Yacht locked eyes with me, saying something to Cream before approaching with a friendly smile on his face. “Hey, how are you feeling?”
I rubbed the back of my neck, not having the energy to try and smile. “I probably feel about as bad as I look.”
His smile turned sad as he rubbed my upper arm. “Time heals all wounds,” he told me. “Whatever you’re going through, you will get through it. Do your best today, okay?”
“I will.”
He glanced behind me and smiled. “Your friends are here. Don’t pull away from them, lean on them for support.”
I frowned but nodded. How the hell has he figured out how I think? I turned toward them and Tew smiled kindly at me, slipping his arm through mine before leading me toward the stands with May and Oak close behind, talking about some show they were both watching.
“Are your hands okay?” he questioned, lowering his voice so the others couldn’t hear him.
“I’ll be fine,” I mumbled in reply. “I’m sorry for the trouble.”
“What do you mean?”
“I keep saying that I’m going to stop causing trouble for everyone, but I keep doing it.”
“You did what you thought was right. No one can ask for more than that,” he smiled. “Plus, we didn’t get in trouble. It wasn’t just you, it was Prem and Waad, too. Don’t worry about it.”
“I’ll try, thank you.”
“Of course!”
“Hey, what are you guys talking about?” Oak forced his way between us with a grin, throwing his arms around both of us. “Planning a date?”
I rolled my eyes, shoving his arm off of me before sitting down on the stone steps. “No, idiot.”
Tew chuckled, taking the seat to my left while Oak sat on my right with May beside him. Once everyone had arrived and was settled, we were instructed to practice our clapping, which I did half-heartedly.
Yacht held up the megaphone, “Do you remember the ‘water jar’ song?”
“Yes!” the freshmen chorused.
“Okay. Sing it out loud. 'Water Jar’, ready?”
For the next hour and a half, we practiced different cheers at Yacht’s instruction before we moved inside to work on the posters for the event. May was painting while Oak and Maprang were working on making these pink, stringy pom-poms. I was supposed to be helping out with painting, but every time I set the brush to the canvas, my mind would wander to unpleasant topics.
“Freshmen,” Yacht called out, carrying a plastic bag in his hand. “I brought you snacks. Share among yourselves.” Yacht stopped in front of me, holding out a lavender colored drink. “Here.”
“Thanks,” I muttered, accepting it from him but he didn’t walk away, instead he squatted down, looking at my canvas which had only black dots on it.
“You can leave early,” he commented. “You have basketball training in the morning, remember?”
How could I forget? I was dreaded the physical activity all day, but I promised to help M and I didn’t want to let him down. “Are you sure?”
“Positive,” he smiled, patting my shoulder. “Go get some rest, you’ve earned it.”
I watched him walk away before putting the lid back on the paint and standing up. I glanced over at Oak and Maprang, watching them laugh and joke as they worked on their assignment. Instead of bothering them, I just quietly slipped away and returned to my dorm. I was feeling so exhausted that I fell onto my bed and immediately fell asleep.
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The buzzing of my phone woke me up and my eyes blinked open, staring at the slit in the curtains. The morning light was only just beginning to rise so it couldn’t be much later than 6:00am. I checked my phone - 5:58 in the morning. One missed call from M, two unread messages. The first message was from BB and the second from Kong.
I replied to Kong first, letting him know that I hadn’t forgotten about basketball practice and that I wouldn’t be late. There was no voicemail, so I didn’t bother messaging M, then I opened up BB’s message.
'Good morning, beautiful <3 How is my bestie doing? In case you’re still feeling bad, here’s a kitty to brighten your day =^-^=’
Despite myself, I smiled at his message, sending him a reply: 'Mornin BB, I hope you slept well. I still feel terrible but I’ll survive. We have our first day of basketball practice today and I’m worried about it but I’ll do my best. Don’t work too hard and make sure you drink water.’
Laying in bed for a few more minutes, I finally rolled out of bed, heading into the bathroom to take a shower. Afterwards, I dressed into a t-shirt and a pair of basketball shorts, grabbing my phone and my room key before slipping my boots on and heading out the door. I hadn’t thought about it until now, but I’d need some sneakers in order to play the game, there’s no way I could in my boots. Well, I might be able to but since they’re steel-toe, I doubt they’d be allowed.
I don’t have any money to buy any and I refuse to ask Kong to do so. Could I borrow a pair? But from who? As I walked down the hall, I pulled out my phone, sending a message to Yacht, whose number had been given to me after I broke down to him. I asked him if he knew anyone I could borrow a pair of sneakers from and I told him my shoe size.
He probably wasn’t awake yet so I didn’t expect a reply, slipping my phone back into my pocket before stepping onto the elevator. The trip to the field was uneventful since most of the campus was still sleeping. I set my bag down next to the bench on the outer edge of the field before sitting down and pulling out my manga.
My phone buzzed about thirty minutes later and I set the book down, slipping it from my pocket to read the message that BB had sent: 'You got this. You’re gonna show them all who’s boss ;) It’s really nice today in Seoul, today is going to be great for both of us, just watch.’
Attached to the message was a picture of the Seoul skyline, lit up in brilliant hues of orange and red as it glimmered off of the buildings. It was breathtakingly beautiful and I smiled. Maybe BB is right. How could something bad happen on such a beautiful day? It didn’t seem possible.
“Good morning,”
I looked and quickly set my phone down, holding my hands in front of me to greet the upperclassman that would be acting as our coach. “Good morning, sir.”
“You must be eager to get to practice,” he chuckled.
I smiled back politely. “I woke up early and couldn’t get back to sleep, so I figured I’d come early.”
He nodded. “We’ll start as soon as everyone arrives.”
“Yes, sir.”
My phone vibrated and I checked it, seeing a new message from Yacht: 'I don’t know off the top of my head, but I’ll ask around. Are you okay wearing your boots for now?’
'Yeah, no problem. Ty Yacht.’
’:)’
“Good morning, Aspen!”
I glanced up, seeing Tee approaching me with Waad not too far behind. “Morning.”
After that, the boys started to arrive one after the other and soon, the coach had us running drills - running sideways from one side of the court to the other and back again. After the drills, we played a practice match - three on three which we won - me, Waad and Tee. After the match, we took turns doing free throws before running more drills.
It was exhausting and by the time it ended, my legs felt like jelly that had been sitting out too long. I was pretty sure I had left part of my soul on the court, along with a few years of my life, but it actually felt… good. During the entire session, I didn’t once think about the things that were bothering me. My mind was focused solely on the game and my teammates and nothing else mattered. While I was on the court, I felt… at peace.
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I stifled a yawn as I headed toward class, my bag slung over my shoulder. My legs felt heavy, my feet sore. These boots definitely have to go, jesus. Steel-toes are generally pretty heavy, but after running around in them all morning, they felt more like blocks of cement than boots. Lifting my feet was a chore and I resisted the urge to groan as the discomfort in my limbs.
I could only hope the soreness would be all worked out by the time the game arrived. I had marked myself as a substitute just like Kong had, but there was still a chance I’d have to play, even if only for a few minutes, but if my legs were sore, I didn’t stand a chance. I’d probably be kicked out for my boots anyway.
“Oi, 0018, Aspen.”
I paused, looking over my shoulder and furrowing my brow in confusion. Why the fuck was Bright approaching me? I straightened my back, putting my hands together in greeting. “H-Hello.”
He nodded, curling his index finger toward himself. “Come with me.”
“B-But… I have c-class…”
“You’ll be fine,” he waved me off. “Just come with me.”
Reluctantly, I did as he asked, following behind him quietly as he led me down the hallway. I was really tempted to ask where he was taking me, but I didn’t bother, scratching the back of my head. Things started to look familiar and I realized he was bringing me to the hazers meeting room, the very same room that Prem had brought me to when he was cleaning my hand. Why is he bringing me here?
Bright opened the door and stepped inside, holding the door open for me. You know that saying, 'Speak of the devil and he shall appear’? Well, it’s never worked until now but it definitely works because I said his name once and now Prem is sitting here in front of me, writing something on a sheet of paper. He looked up when he heard of enter, his eyes narrowing at me.
“The hell is she doing here, Bright?”
I winced at his tone. He won’t even address me directly, but he has no problem staring me down like I’m about to be murdered. Though, he did pose a good question - why the hell AM I here?
Bright opened up the locker, pulling a triangular box from the bottom before turning around. He glanced over at me as he set the box on the table. “Why are you just standing there? Come here.”
“Oi,” Prem scowled at him, “Don’t ignore me.”
Bright grinned, holding his hands together. “Patience, young padawan.” Then he turned to me. “You’re still standing there, sit.”
With a sigh, I came farther into the room, eyeing the box wearily as I took the seat across from Prem - the very same seat I had been sitting in when said male took care of my hand. I watched Bright closely as he took the lid off of the carboard box and I craned my neck to see what was inside.
Bright pulled out a pair of blue skate shoes, the exact same as the ones he was currently wearing aside from the color - his were a light grey. “Yacht called me up this morning and said you needed some sneakers for basketball. Try them on.”
“A-Are you sure?” I wondered, taking the shoes from his hands.
Bright folded his arms over his chest, leaning his hip against the side of the table. “Those boots of yours aren’t allowed, so unless you plan on getting removed from the game before it even begins, I suggest you try them on.”
I knew he was right so I kicked my boots off, hoping that my socks didn’t stink as I pulled on the sneakers, tying up the laces. With them secure on my feet, I stood up and took a few steps to test them out.
“Well?” he questioned. “Do they fit properly?”
“A-A little big, but if I tighten t-the laces… they fit fine. T-Thank you so much,” I told him, putting my hands together as I bent my upper body forward.
“No problem, glad they fit,” Bright grinned, sending a sneaky look to Prem before he started toward the door. “I’ve got somewhere to be. Later!”
“A-Ah, wait!” I cried out, but the door was already closing behind him, leaving me alone with Prem. It felt as if the temperature in the room dropped several degrees without Bright there and I wasn’t sure how to deal with this situation. Holding back a sigh, I reached down to put my boots into the box, sealing it with the lid.
I chanced a look at Prem and he was focused on whatever he was writing, so I thought it best not to bother him. I muttered a soft, 'excuse me’ before turning and heading for the door. My hand had just brushed against the handle when he called my name, making my body freeze up.
“We need to talk,” he stated and I heard the scraping of the chair as he stood up.
“A-About what?” I questioned softly, turning sideways to glance at him.
“You know what,” he rolled his eyes, stepping around the table so that he was standing in front of me. “About what you said.”
I winced at the thought, but knew deep down that this would happen eventually. “I-I’m sorry for… for yelling at… at you, but… I m-meant what I sa-said.”
His eyes narrowed at me, arms folded over his chest. “You really surprised me with your outburst. I didn’t expect someone like you to have the guts to speak to me like that. You didn’t even stutter.”
“I-I was angry,” I muttered, staring at the ground as I shifted my weight from one foot to the other.
“You must really care about that guy,” he commented with a surprisingly soft voice.
“Well… h-he’s precious to… to my friends so he's… he’s p-precious to me, too… and you…” I met his gaze with a frown, “you were going to… to hit him. P-Prem, that's… that’s not okay. The seniors… they’re so important to us, b-but… when you act l-like that, you just hurt yourselves. You can’t earn r-respect through… through intimidation and cruelty. There’s a b-big difference between being… being tough and… and just being a jerk.”
He didn’t respond and I glanced over at him to check his reaction. Though his face was blank, his brow was furrowed and he seemed to be lost in thought, his eyes focused on the wall to his left.
“I-I’m sorry if you think… I’m being disrespectful, I don’t mean to be! I just…” I took a deep breath, turning to face him fully. “I don’t know h-how hard you guys work or all of the… the things you d-do for us, but I… I know it’s a l-lot. I really want you guys to… to show the f-freshmen that you deserve respect, why c-can’t you see that?”
His expression softened and he stepped closer, meeting my eyes. His sudden close proximity made me feel nervous, but not uncomfortable, my heart picking up speed within my chest. “Do you respect me?” he asked softly.
I nodded softly. “W-When you’re not… screaming at us…”
He heaved a heavy sigh, running his hand through his hair. “I’m sorry for yelling at you… again.”
“I don’t want to… to fight with y-you anymore,” I mumbled, frowning at him. “It’s f-frustrating and stressful.”
He shifted, holding his hand out to me. “Then, let’s be friends.”
“Eh?” My eyes widened in surprise. Now, that I never would have expected. “Y-You… want to be friends?”
“You don’t?” he quirked a brow and I quickly shook my head, slipping my hand into his. It was warm, his fingers calloused as they wrapped around my own.
“I do… v-very much so,” I breathed out. His lips curled up into a smile, soft and beautiful, lighting up his face like I had never seen before. It brought a smile to my own lips as we shook hands. “I know… Waad can be… difficult, but… p-please try not to view him t-too harshly.”
“No promises,” he scoffed, removing his hand from mine so he could put it into his pocket, but his smile remained intact. “But I’ll try…. on one condition.”
“Always with the conditions,” I rolled my eyes with a laugh, beginning to feel more comfortable. “What is it?”
“Stay out of trouble,” he said seriously, glancing at my hands, “and stop getting hurt.”
“Ah…” I rubbed the back of my head sheepishly. “I’ll do my best.”
“Do you have your booklet on you?” he asked suddenly.
“I should,” I set the box down on the small table beside the door before rooting through my bag, finding the booklet settled between the pages of a textbook that I’m sure I haven’t even looked at yet.
He took it from me, approaching the table and setting the book down before picking up a pen and scribbling his name across the page. I looked at him in surprise as he handed it back to me and he told me, “Consider it a peace offering,” and smiled again.
“Thank you!”
He nodded, turning back to the table to continue working on his report. I left the hazer’s meeting room feeling a lot better than I had in the past few days. I was actually becoming friends with the hazers, I couldn’t believe it. I pulled my phone from my pocket and texted BB, updating him on the situation. For a brief moment, I wondered if he even cared about my life or if I was just bothering him with my constant updates as if he were Twitter itself, but I shook off that thought easily because of my good mood.
His reply came only a few minutes later: ’:o friends with the hazers? That’s crazy! They just can’t resist your charm, huh~ Soon, you’ll be ruling the school!’
I laughed, replying: 'Yeah right lol but BB you won’t believe it, Prem actually SMILED at me. Like, a genuine smile. He looks so freaking cute when he smiles, I wish he’d smile more’
'Hm, but if he did that, it wouldn’t be as beautiful, right?’
'What do you mean?’
'It’s beautiful because it’s rare. If he smiled all the time, it wouldn’t be rare and therefore wouldn’t be as beautiful!’
'huh… you might be on to something, BB. Always so wise.’
'ofc ;)’
'I still can’t believe Bright let me borrow his shoes, tho I’m sure it’s only bc Yacht asked him to. Either way, I’m grateful. I should be better on the court now!’
'I still can’t believe you wear the same shoe size as a third year hazer ;P’
'rude! >[ My mother’s side of the family had big feet okay… totally not my fault.’
'I know~ I’m just joking don’t mind <3 you should record practice and send it to me, I want to see you guys tearing up the court! I have a friend that’s into basketball, I’m sure he’d cheer you guys on, too.’
Now that made me nervous. BB and I had never exchanged photos before, just discussed features like hair color, eye color, etc. What if he saw me, realized I’m just some heavyset white girl, the complete opposite of what they show on TV, and then he hates me? It’s not the first time someone would stop talking to me for my looks and I loved him so much, I really didn’t want to lose him…
He messaged again: 'Only if you feel comfortable. No pressure <3’
I smiled, replying: 'I’ll think about it :) gtg, will message you later’ I tapped the power button and slid the phone into my pocket, feeling in high spirits.
Cupid’s Last Wish is a 2022 Thai bl, adventure, body-switching drama. When Win’s father dies, his will divides up the shares of the family farm to four people including Win’s long-time friend, Korn. This causes conflict when Win becomes suspicious of Korn and how he ended up with a portion of the farm. Win’s anger causes him to be in a car accident with his sister. He wakes up in her body and is told he must get holy water from four temples in seven days to return to his body. Korn accompanies Win on this adventure and their true feelings come to light.
Where to watch: This drama will eventually be on YouTube (the first episode is up now).
Spoilers ahead…
Whumpee: “Win” Sawin Warodom played by Mix Sahaphap
Episode 1: Sad (remembering his recently passed father), crying, thinks his close friend betrayed him, in a car accident, wakes up in the hospital, oxygen mask, bandage on his head, bruise on his face, discovers that he is in his sister’s body
Episode 2: Still in the hospital, told his fate would always bring him back luck when he’s alone, his body is unconscious in a hospital bed, carried over someone’s shoulder, slammed against a car, yelled at, sad
Episode 3: Collapses, concern for him, held in friend’s (enemy at the moment) arms, sleeping with head in friend’s lap, scared of ghosts, hiding his face in friend’s shoulder, running in fear, hiding in friend’s shoulder again, friend offers to be his eyes, lead him out of a haunted forest, scared, hit in the face with a pillow, sleeping (or passed out) in the dirt
Episode 4: Wakes up not knowing where he is, in the cold without a jacket, tries to stand, falls back down, grunting in pain, huddles into himself for warmth, shivering, too weak/cold to yell for help, falls back, friend catches him, friend helps warm him up, helped to walk, collapses, unconscious body in hospital bed, cramps, crying
Episode 5: Cramps, curled up on a bed, sleeping with a hot water bottle, worried about his cow
Episode 6: Worried about his cow, collapses (in relief), breathing heavy, carried away, scolded, thinks that the guy he likes likes his sister, aunt and uncle conspire against him, they want to declare him incompetent and take his shares of the farm, snaps at his friend, nightmare, wakes up gasping and sweating, upset, saying over and over again how it’s his fault, wrists grabbed so he doesn’t hurt himself, breathing heavy, begged to rest, friend says he’s worried about him, thinks that friend is only worried about his sister, crying, breakdown, crying
Bonus whumpee: “Korn” Thapakorn Chaiphitak played by Earth Pirapat
Episode 7: Falls to his knees while climbing up a mountain, says that he is a bad luck magnet, flashback to his car accident
Korn: Steps on a sea urchin, helped to walk, bandage on his foot, helped to walk again, bloody bandage, grunting in pain while holding his foot up, wound tended to, falls into the water
Episode 8: Scared, sleeping with his arms on his knees and head on his arms, nightmare, crying, jumps in the water to save friend, unconscious, dragged out of the water, given CPR (both in the cave after drowning and his unconscious body in the hospital), coughs up water, wincing in pain, laying with head in friend’s lap, helped to walk, back in his own body, sad, (after credits scene) foot caught in a tree root underwater, nearly drowns, saved, shaking
Korn:Falls into the water, concern for him, unconscious, friend gives him air while underwater, giving friend CPR, begging him to wake up, (after credits scene) side cut while saving friend from drowning
Episode 9: Jealous, in a hospital bed, sad, crying, upset that the guy he likes is getting engaged with his sister
Episode 10: Finds out his mother intentionally caused a conflict with him and his friend because she knew they liked each other
Whumpees: Black and White played by Gun Atthaphan,Sean played by Off Jumpol , Dan played by Fluke Gawin and Yok played by First Kanaphan
Synopsis: One day, seemingly from nowhere, White feels an agony like death. He recovers in the hospital, but they’re unable to determine the cause. Then he picks up a call from a childhood friend, Tod. Tod tells him that Black is in a coma following a vicious attack and he learns that Black is in a motorcycle gang. Unable to endure the harm done to his brother in silence, and suspecting it was one of Black’s close friends—Sean, Gram, or Yok—who betrayed him, White disguises himself as Black to root out the traitor. (MDL)
Genre: BL, Romance, Action, Thriller, Crime, Cop
Watch On:KissAsian
♥️: Once again I wanna say thank you to everyone who suggested and requested this drama! This is another highly requested drama!
