ok look you just cannot convince me that light yagami wont be down to become a sugar baby. asshole loves being worshipped and owning fancy stuff.
light, “daddy, can you buy me a new rolex?”
soichiro and L, at the same time, “ok son” “as you wish, light-kun”
Look what y’all did. Look what’s in the Death Note tag now smh
@kiranatrix Bold of them to miss Light’s whole god complex, in which he loves to use people to do his bidding, and does whatever the HECK he wants, WHEN and HOW he wants XD
(Also, sugar baby? The only sugar baby I see is THIS GUY)
which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?
y- you were putting it in cold water?????
Radish. Answer the question radish.
yeah??? i thought for like. 5 years that ppl just put it in hot water 2 speed up the tea-ification process didn’t realize there was an actual reason
You dont have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes???
[ID: Tags reading “u think i have the patience to boil water wtf ?????” /End ID]
why are you. putting it in the microwave to boil it
Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove
Its takes less than a minute
Bestie is ur stovetop powered by the fucking sun
How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove
Like seven minutes
Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat n it boils in like two minutes… less than that is u use a saucepan…
Crying you’re putting the whole mug on the stove ???? On medium heat???? Ur stove is enchanted
Every single person in this post is a fucking lunatic
Yet another post that reads like four shakespeare characters who come out in the middle of the play to talk about something completely unrelated for comic relief
(Enter RADISHN’T, MOTHMAN MISATO, BOIMG FROG and CATS'N RAINCOATS, stage left. They are having a HEATED DISCUSSION.)
RADISHN’T: Prithee, which one of you had planned to tell
Of diff'rent flavours gained by simple act
Of brewing tea with water hot, not cold?
MOTHMAN: Egad! you poured the water cold? Wherefore?!
FROG: An answer from you, Radish, I must beg.
RADISHN’T: Indeed I did, dear friends - why does this shock?
Without the guide of others I assumed
That heat was merely added for the sake
Of expediting this solution’s brewing!
Half a decade I have spent, or more,
Not questioning this worldview I had made.
In fact, I am myself a bit surprised
That you might think that I, your dearest friend,
Might have a patience of sufficient stock
To wait until a pot of water boils.
FROG: Three minutes overtaxes patience so?
The microwave will beep when it is done!
CATS'N: My friend, this answer vexes me the more!
Can it be true that thou dost boil by nuke?!
FROG: Are you in turn, my friend, so shocked to know
That I have not the patience, like our Root,
To boil upon the stove our favour’d drink?
CATS'N: It takes less than a minute!
FROG: On what plate?
Perhaps your dinner cooks atop the sun?
CATS'N: How long can take your stove to fill the task
Of boiling but a single cup alone?
FROG: In minutes?
CATS'N: Yes!
FROG: I counted seven, once.
CATS'N: Perhaps you ought to have your timepiece checked!
If on a middle heat you place the cup
You soon will have the scalding drink you crave.
Two minutes, in a mug upon the plate
Or even less, if you should have a pot.
FROG: You cause me tears - is this how thou dost live?
You place upon the iron stove a mug?
A mug, ceramic, filled with water cold?
How do these flames, though medium in height,
Not shatter like a glass this fragile thing?
Surely, then, your kitchen is bewitched
With magicks far beyond the mortal ken!
(The FOUR realise they have wandered into the THRONE ROOM. The ROYAL COURT watches with fascination.)
KING: Ev'ry single person in this group must be a fucking lunatic, it seems.
Ok naughty children! Tumblr has twisted my arm and I will be watching the first episode of Moon Knight and commenting solely from an Egyptologists perspective. That means I will be saying things about it that bug me as an Egyptologist, which may make sense show wise, but I don’t care about that. If you’re using a statue of Senwosret III and calling it Ramesses II I will notice and twitch my eye.
two tags to block if you don’t want to see this:
#moon knight spoilers
#an egyptologist is forced to watch Moon Knight
We begin with episode one:
If you don’t like people hurting themselves, the first episode literally begins with someone smashing a glass, filling their shoes with the glass, then putting those shoes on.
Hoping that gets explained because that wasn’t a fun cold open
His fish are living the Egypt life:
London’s history museum is once again UCL’s front quad and portico
There appears to be a sand model of a pyramid that kids can touch in this museum and I’m just screaming at sand getting everywhere
Child is going with Oscar Isaac. This is a stranger danger nightmare
This coffin should be in the dimly lit room back there. Paint/colour preservation my god. Also they have a colossus? Damn
He’s talking about mummification to the child specifically pulling the brain out through the nose with a hook….except he says all the organs except for the heart came out the nose….hmm yes that totally happened…
how do you get a spleen out through a nostril anyway?
he then talks about needing the heart to prove worthiness to enter the afterlife and ehhh that’s close enough
oh no he says only the worthy could pass through the field of reeds, which….is where you end up if you *pass* the weighing of the heart, you don’t go through it to pass.
Oh my god he works there
Oh thank god he works in the gift shop
*singsong voice* why are the staff chewing gum on the museum floor
They’re apparently selling Taweret plushies and I’m wondering if they’re pregnant or just basic hippo. I can’t tell because they’re in a box.
I am 7 minutes into this programme….
Local nerd is going on about the posters for the Ennead being wrong, but I haven’t seen them close enough to tell if he’s right or not
Oh apparently the poster only has 7 gods and the Ennead has 9. Fair point nerd
Workplace threat of being shoved in a sarcophagus with a Pharaoh
Now deeply confused as he appears to be exiting the National Art Gallery (London) onto Trafalgar Square….this is the same museum as earlier it wants me to believe. Also I was wrong about it being UCL it’s apparently the Museum of Fine Arts in Budapest. The interior may be this too.
However, he gets the bus to work which is weird because the area he lives in (or at least the real life street) is in walking distance (no more than 15 minutes) of both Trafalgar Square and the British Museum.
10 minutes in and he’s reading books on the Ennead and the ‘rift between Gods and Man’ which is odd because the Ennead is usually a creation myth of Atum (the masturbating one)
No, the Hieroglyphs on this scarab are not readable:
We’ve got the walking mummy trope!
Egyptology aside, Europeans will be confused by the mishmash of locations in this. I’ve already seen Neuschwanstein Castle cgi’d into the Hungarian countryside
OH NO IT’S A WHITE AMERICAN PREACHER MAN DOING SHIT FOR EGYPTIAN GODDESSES TO UNSUSPECTING HUNGARIANS
Neat scales tattoo though
'I judge you in Ammit’s name but with a fraction of her power’ umm what??? She’s a duatling…she eats hearts….she’s not a goddess
Tattoo magic and capable of morality judgements
Magic tattoo hates an old lady more at 11
I’m wondering if this guy thinks he’s Thoth or Anubis
Unwashed American Preacher Man just drained the life force from an old lady in the name of Ammit. the fuck?
HA HE’S SPEAKING TRANSLIT
dwA amminit….well it should be dwA am-mwt but w/e unwashed dude
Hungary has Americans running Ammit death cults….this is fine
Somehow the scarab belongs to Ammit….that’s a motif that’s wrong in so many ways. Like you have 3 cool creatures associated with her (crocodile, hippo, lion) and you couldn’t come up with a cool object that’d actually fit? Booooooo
Apparently it can be used as a weapon
Not sure the DID community is going to like this programme
Everyone appears to have the scales tattoo so this is an Ammit cult somehow…
I am 20 minutes in (halfway)
Just gonna say, this is a very American flat for what’s supposed to be London
I think this is set modern day but at one point he finds and uses a Motorola Razr from 2005. I know this because I had one in 2005
He has archival draws in his flat. Nerd.
God the whole building is american af. This is weird because this is supposed to be London and it looks nothing like it lmao
The lift is…idk how to explain it but it’s jarring because there’s no european 'safety’ documentation on it. I’m weird and I notice these things.
Also I’m filling time because nothing Egypt related has happened in 10 minutes.
EVIL MUMMY TROPE DING DING DING
Also this is what I mean about it feeling american. That sign would be on a wall in the UK and it would just have a man running to an open door. But w/e, I’m used to seeing weird takes on my country
Weird bird/mummy turns into old lady at the drop of a hat i.e. it just stops happening at random points. Can’t tell if I’m supposed to feel terror or not. Also how does this old lady afford a central london flat on a british pension? UNPOSSIBLE
WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK
No idea what this is other than 'creepy mummified bird’
Local bird guy seen again outside Natwest
IProtagonist is somehow still taking the bus to work despite this road being really close to the 'museum’ he works at and also his flat being really close too. I know too much about roads in one section of London because I’ve been stuck in traffic in them.
Actually, annoyingly, if he’s supposed to work at 'the museum of London’ as a stand in for the British museum…he’s going the wrong way down this road.
UNWASHED AMERICAN PREACHER MAN IS HERE
Just got off the bus at Tottenham Court Road tube station…and is going to catch the tube to work. The British Museum Museum of London is a 5 minute walk from here. Why are you going in circles my dude? Are you going to get off at Holborn for shits and giggles?
I don’t know how they’ve got painted columns from Abydos in this museum….because they’re still attached to the temple last I saw
Oh my god they’ve got the book of the dead painted onto these columns?? There’s Ammit and the scales. WHAT IS GOING ON?
Uh oh cult of ammit has infiltrated the museum security guards somehow??
UNWASHED GUY IS STROKING EGYPTIAN PAINTWORK WITH HIS HANDS BUT ALSO THE COLUMNS IT WAS ON WEREN’T IN CASES OR PROTECTED SO MUSEUM WORKER SCREECH
Just seen Ammit described as 'worlds first bogeyman’ and I died inside
Apparently Ammit got bored of waiting for people to be judged and just started doing it herself? What in the hell? Is she Girlbossing it?
'Had Ammit been free she would have prevented Hitler and the destruction he wrought’ BITCH WHAT THE FUCK
NO I AM NOT KIDDING
ANow also: Nero, the Armenian Genocide and Pol Pot
I am going to scream
Apparently Ammit couldn’t do this because the other gods betrayed her and so did her own avatar. She’s not a god. What the fuck
The Museum’s Egyptology collection is weirdly organised and I hate it. Everything is out of date order and doesn’t make sense.
I’ve no idea if it’s a real collection or one they’ve made up, I think it’s both but ???????????
I mean the pillars are made up. They appear to have the Ramesses II bust I know is in the BM and at least one object I know to be in Cairo, but the rest could be real???
Anyway he hears a doggo now so I suppose this is Anubis in one shape or form
A mummified dead doggo that’s very angry
Also just had an alabaster pot out there on a stand with no glass case. He nearly knocked it over. That’s a New Kingdom style one so….3500 years old. Good going there curators and conservators of this museum.
Can’t take a screenshot of it because it moves too fast, but as something happens hieroglyphs flicker all over the walls of the room.
Ok thank god this episode is over. It was painful
Haven’t seen the episode yet, but from a genre fiction perspective “this monster from this myth tradition is actually our god, and you only think she’s a minor monster because of the suppression of our true religion” works for an antagonist cult.
yeah that’d only work if the Ancient Egyptians saw Ammit as a monster, which they didn’t. Again, as I said right at the beginning, I am not commenting on story elements, only what they got wrong with regards to Egyptology.
I’m cackling at your commentary. You take the Egyptology, I’ll deal with the abysmal understanding of underworld mythology
