psychically smacking my new hire with a spoon like “no, don’t work off the clock” “yes, we give you breaks” “no, we aren’t nice for doing this, it’s literally the law” it feels like I’ve adopted a shelter cat
*in the arms of the angels playing softly in the background* with your help, we can give just-out-of-college workers some god damn standards
When I was like 5 or 6 my mom took my family to Florida to see my grandma at her place out there and I used to feed the bunnies in her yard saltine crackers and walk around w all the armadillos in the neighborhood bc I was That Weird Kid who Attracted Animals but like nothing could prepare my sister for the sight of 5 year old me trudging out of some weeds, pink shorts and legs covered in pond skudge, holding an alligator in my arms because “look at this cool guy.”
