#this was shite highkey tho i blame mother nature for this

II-II : chamber of reflection — the skill showcase interview

      june 2019. mga 5 skill showcase. wordcount: 906
            featuring: @joohyunrk@rknak@rkheejin@rkxbin

fix your hair here. apply more lipstick. it’s the same cycle once again. jungeun finds herself in another interview room, where she waits for the next interview to commence. she hopes its the same guy who’s been interviewing her for the past few sessions. jungeun thinks she might have formed a friendship with him, though its probably some form of delusion from finding out his name. kang-pdor something like that. she doesn’t actually want to be friends with him though, she just wants to irritate him with her answers. 

the door opens and he enters, with the same not this shit again face. but, she supposes its more like a oh, what shit are we getting into now face. jungeun thinks she’s warmed up to him. 

( and she hopes she’s warmed up to the viewers as well. ) 

the cycle included the interviewer wasting no time to get to the questions. there were fifty other interviews to do and time doesn’t stop for any of them. jungeun closes her eyes for a moment and wishes that she’d reach the point where she’d have a thirty minute interview. better yet—a documentary. 

— what were your thoughts about last week? 

“i worked hard. so i knew it wouldn’t falter,” jungeun replied. she thinks about this saying she heard about during her time in los angeles. “hard work will never betray you." 

she translates the term in korean and the interviewer nods once before moving on to the next question. 

—you had one week to prepare your performance. your name has been mentioned quite a few times. clue us in on your process. 

jungeun’s taken aback and she takes a second to process his string of statements. my name has been mentioned? she raises her brow in thought. she hopes they were only goodwords but she supposes its asking for too much if she wished that. she wasn’t one to sugarcoat her words. was she going to sugarcoat her words?

she reaches a point where she’s beginning to think too much. in reality, its been five seconds but there wasn’t time to spare. 

"oh,” jungeun jumps in her seat as she realizes she’s lost in thought. “right. process. do you guys even want to hear about that?" 

"we’re here for a reason, aren’t we?" 

”right.“jungeun runs her finger through her hair and takes a deep breath in. "so, i basically practiced non-stop. i don’t believe in breaks." 

"you don’t?” the interviewer is caught off guard, which catches jungeun off guard. she almost wants to say, we’re in an idol competition; no one has breaks in the idol world. 

“i mean, obviously i eat. i sleep. do the things to upkeep my survival but i don’t believe in slacking off. i practiced for ten or more hours everyday and spent the last day practicing in front of my team." 

"yourteam?” the interviewer asks and makes a ‘hmm’ sound. jungeun understands how it could have sounded pretentiousbut she wasn’t going to apologize for having a support system. 

“yeah my team.” she imitates his tone. “well, just some of my teachers and my mom. i got critiques thrown at me while i danced my routine, i think it helped.with the outcome. at least, it helped with how i performed it. i don’t know how others might have perceived my routine. but, i’m satisfied with my performance; i don’t want to leave with any regrets.”

—perception is important. one performance can look great to some but horrible to others. who did you think did the best under each skill? 

“honestly. i didn’t care for the rappers and singers.” jungeun says, as she crossed her legs and placed her hands atop her knees. “other than my friends,of course. heejin and changbin especially,i had no doubt they’ll always do great. but i’ve already rambled about them last week. do you want me to ramble on about them again?" 

the interviewer gives a go ahead gesture but jungeun decides to skip it. 

—did you pay attention to the dancers? 

”of course,“jungeun replies. "i’m a dancer. that’s one of the reasons why i didn’tpay close attention to the other performers. i think i was too immersed on focusing on mydirect competition for this week." 

—what did you think about the dancers today? 

"bae joohyun. she did bad.” that’s the first name that appeared in her head. she cannot sugarcoat the truth and its worse with dancing. you can seethe quality of one’s performance, there’s often no chance for explanation. “but, i feel like she should have done better. she shouldn’t have exerted herself too much. i could tell she’s a dancer and a good one. but dancers have their off days and she should have prevented it from it being today." 

"nakyung,” jungeun’s face turns sour as she thinks about the girl. they werefriends. or are,officially. but jungeun thinks about the time she found out nakyung was the user behind her enemyonstantwitter. jungeun knows its immature to think about but she couldn’t believe nakyung was someone who could have an absolute lackof taste. “she’s cute.it was cute, i guess. that’s what you expect from someone like her." 

the interviewer nods and jungeun knows its over. she’s said enough. she just hopes this isn’t her last.