Lillian Gish, Bette Davis, Vincent Price and Ann Sothern in The Whales of August (1987) and Lillian with Lindsay Anderson. This is Lindsay’s second entry on the New York Times list of the 1,000 Best Films, after This Sporting Life.
The Whales of August is Lillian’s third honorable mention (after Orphans of the Storm and Duel in the Sun), Bette’s tenth honorable mention, Vincent’s second (after The Long Night), and Ann’s third (after Brother Orchid and Lady in a Cage).
Welcome, foolish mortals, to iheartvincentprice.tumblr.com: a month-long celebration of one of the hottest man-gods ever to walk the face of this good, green earth…
Before we dive in, a note: I will not be announcing spoiler alerts in this blog. If you’re brave enough to read about a lecherous 28-year-old ladybaby lusting over a dead guy, trust me: you’re also brave enough to take the risk that you might swallow some unexpected movie spoilers along the way. Such is lust. Such is life.
And now, for the first deliciously diabolical movie review of the month:
Ah yes. The Pit and the Pendulum. What better way to kick off an entire month of VP lovin’ than to review this unforgettable Edgar Allan Poe tale of torture (are you surprised?), grief and, plain ol’ crazy-tude. No one plays insane like Vincey. He is simply a pro when it comes to maniacal facial expressions (including, but in no way limited to an astoundingly well-executed version of “the crazy eye”), gibbering, fevered monologues, and sadistic, uncontrollable cackling.
But first, some background: ThePit and the Pendulum was released in 1961 and directed by Roger Corman (diehard musical theater geeks will recognize him as the creator of the original, non-musical film The Little Shop of Horrors). It’s set in Spain in the 16th century in a sinister castle (hawt), where Vincey lives with his supportive and sympathetic sister (Luana Anders) and is mourning the recent death of his beloved wife Elizabeth (Barbara Steele).
Seems like a great life, right? But wait! There’s a foreboding stranger at the door! And blast! It’s none other than Elizabeth’s brother, (John Kerr - all growed up since his role as the awkward teenager-turned-cougar-lovah in Tea & Sympathy). Dubious and (understandably) suspicious, he arrives at Castle Price demanding to know the “true reason” behind Elizabeth’s untimely death. She couldn’t have died from a rare blood disease. She just couldn’t have!
Having provided the basic backstory, let us now dive into the lusty, lascivious portion of tonight’s opera.
First, allow me state the obvious: there’s nothing sexier than a tormented, brooding man.
I’m not trying to get all manic-pixie-dream-girl on ya, but it’s true. Let’s face it, cabbages. We’ve all met the opposite of the broody-man, and he’s not all that interesting, is he? Oh sure, he’s chock full of energy and positivity (yawn). He can’t wait to go to Vegas with his bros next month (check please). He’s pumped (and will actually use the word “pumped”) about the presentation he’s giving at his job this Thursday (gag me with a spoon).
These types of men remind me of Dalmatian puppies. They’re adorable in that they seem to possess an endless reservoir of energy and zest for life…but let’s face it: that shit gets old.
And if you’re a non-dingbat individual in possession of even an iota of personal substance or emotional depth?
It’s the tormented, brooding, conflicted men you really wanna fuck.
Am I right, y’all?
Needless to say, VP’s got the tormented, tortured act down. To a Tee. To a Tee PLUS, homies. As his character’s anguish intensifies, you, my fellow Vincent Price lovahs, will be delighted to know that he performs:
1) a very sensual fainting take, and
2) one very sexy/hilarious expression in response to accidentally stumbling into some thick spider webs (I mean, who doesn’t feel sexy stumbling into a spider web the size of freakin’ KANSAS?).
But the best part? He does it all in an extremely prominent 16th century ruffled collar:
Oh yeah. I’m getting hot.
But the best and Vincey Priciest of acting comes in the last third of the film, when he follows his dead wife’s beckoning all the way down into the torture chamber in his basement (don’t act like you never thought of getting one), and then during the glorious finale when he goes stark raving cray cray and starts channeling his sadistic, torture-obsessed father.
The movie as a whole holds up as a rather entertaining and suspenseful chunk of work. If you’ve ever read anything by Edgar Allan Poe, you hopefully already know that the man: 1) was probably a mental case, and 2) knew how to tap into primal human fears like none other (okay, maybe Stephen King, but he came way later). One of those fears is of being buried alive (ahem: “premature interment” as they refer to it in the film - and yes, I am consciously choosing to refrain from making a joke about it). And I must say that even in a 52-year-old movie, the concept does not fail to pack an emotional punch. The penultimate pendulum scene (hah! I got to use an SAT word) builds tremendous suspense: it actually had me gasping a few times (Imagine! Moi! Gasping!) And from a psychological standpoint, the movie is great fun and contains plenty of post-film discussion fodder: there’s daddy issues, dissociation and lunacy. What more could a twisted, depraved moviegoer ask for?
“Am I not the spawn of his depraved blood?” Yes, Vincey, you are.
Maybe I’m biased (wellOFCOURSEIam), but I really don’t think the movie could have been as entertaining without ol’ Vincent in the lead role. One of the man’s great talents lay in his ability to be totally and utterly believable in some of the most unbelievable roles…and to bring a sense of humor to those roles at the same time. To see his transformation from weak-and-resigned-widower-in-mourning-turned-stark-raving-lunatic is nothing short of mesmerizing.
Get excited, cabbages. In t-minus three (3) days, we begin our gruesome, ghastly descent into the world of unabashed lusting over Vincent Leonard Price, Jr.: The Merchant of Menace. The King of Grand Guignol (whatever the hell that means…don’t ask me, I got it off IMDB).
Or as some (i.e. me) like to call him: Vincey Pricey.
…at least until I come up with something better. Which I probably won’t (JUSTBEINREAL).
During the entire month of October (the ghouliest, ghostliest month of all and therefore the most fitting for VP - OBVIOUSLY), I will be celebrating this delectable man with lustful reviews of his movies, delicious Vincey-inspired recipes (ol’ Vincent was quite the master chef, didntyakknow), VP factoids so mindblowing, you’ll (do something crazy and completely out-of-character, I’m too lazy to come up with something clever at this point in the post), and occasional musings on the rhapsody and ravishment of having a dead man crush.
Don’t act like you’ve never been there.
So stay tuned, Vincent Price lovahs. ”The midnight hour is close at hand.”
Carved the pumpkins and programmed the LED matrixes myself. I’m currently just watching Over the Garden Wall with my grandma while handing out candy. Gonna sip some cider and play Call of Cthulhu once the trick-or-treaters call it a night. :3
R.I.P. Sir Christopher Lee. One of the most memorable actors in screen history, from bit player to screen icon, Sir Christopher always shone brightly. (b. Christopher Frank Carandini Lee; May 27, 1922 - June 7, 2015)
“ We don’t always get the kind of work we want, but we always have a choice of whether to do it with good grace or not.” - Christopher Lee
So I finally get to have another Vincent dream and it turned out weird (again). I was walking down a street and it was getting dark. I think I was on my way to the bar I own in my dream but I saw Vincent (1970s era) up ahead going into a little antiques store. Suddenly I have a whole narrative in my head of the backstory to the dream (weird how that happens). I worked for him as an intern or something so I followed him into the store with my arms full of old books.
The store was much bigger (and open) inside, there were a few guys who worked there, and I guess I was in charge of helping with inventory and marking it in the books. Vincent said hello to the others and then turned to me to see if I was there and ready to work. He went back over to the area we came in and it was a wall of windows. He gave the signal, made some witty remark (I can’t recall) that said he was in charge and then we started going underwater.
I have a serious fear of deep water and never like these types of dreams, so I started freaking out (internally) and wanted to shout “Let me off!” before we went under but it happened so fast and all I saw was underwater stuff out the windows and knew I was stuck there. Not even being in a submarine (or whatever this thing was supposed to be) with Vincent was enough to make me enjoy this dream! Plus, you know how his movies (especially with water) tended to end! Now I’m afraid to follow him in my dreams, haha!
I mean, I coulda handled a “Master of the World” thing in the sky. But not a “War-Gods of the Deep” situation. Even though I can always breathe underwater in my dreams; it’s still terrifying.
Celebrate the Master of Horror himself with this spooky button! You can almost hear his velvety voice speaking to you from beyond the grave! It’s utterly macabre.
This one inch pinback button was designed and hand-made by yours truly with all the finest button-making equipment and supplies!
Check out Meghan’s adorable Vincent buttons/magnets. She also has a selection of other buttons and magnets in her Etsy store which are based on pop culture and more! (Images were kindly used with permission. Watermarks were added by me and are not on the actual product.)
I haven’t had a Vincent dream in ages but I had one last night for whatever reason. I was in a car with a couple of friends (who were a couple) and then it turned into a van where I was sitting in the back waiting for the girl to come back from wherever. She got in and we were driving away and I saw Vincent (1970s) walking down the sidewalk away from us. I wanted to jump out and go say hi but my friend beat me to it. She came back and I got out and followed him. I didn’t want him to see me, but when he turned the corner, I ran to catch up and as I turned the corner, he was standing there waiting for me.
We walked together (and knew each other well….kinda like we had dated before but I’d moved onto other people since). We kissed a bit, then continued walking. He held my arm (sorta leading the way) and we started arguing. I asked why he was ignoring me, he called me Paula and I said that wasn’t who I was. Then we were in a little outdoor shop and he was kissing some other girl. I got mad and stormed off, but he caught up with me later and it was all because I’d ignored him for so long and now he was just trying to get back at me and make me jealous.
It wasn’t the best dream, but he looked cool at least. And even though it wasn’t a great experience, we did spend some time together, lol!
![Backtrack (1990) VHS Rip [1992 Director’s Cut by Dennis Hopper] IMDB Link props to trixymo fo](https://64.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lnr49wqESC1qlfbeho1_640.jpg "Backtrack (1990) VHS Rip [1992 Director’s Cut by Dennis Hopper] IMDB Link props to trixymo fo")
