#weight loss tw
Also this whole ordeal has really opened my eyes to how deeply messed up people’s relationship to food is in our society, even people who seem relatively reasonable about it. I’m not talking about impossible standards of thinness or fad diets or weight loss pills, I knew about all that stuff. I’m talking about how even people who would NEVER endorse that stuff still have so damn many harmful ideas about food and weight and exercise and health.
Such as my parents. Sure, they would never encourage me to become underweight or cut entire food groups from my diet or try ~intermittent fasting~, in fact they would be rightly concerned if I did any of those things. They’re Reasonable People™️. They know you can’t fix all your health problems by not eating these 3 foods like the click bait article said.
But. They still believe things like:
- There are such things as bad foods and good foods.
- The body’s internal cues cannot be fully trusted. Without external control over our impulses we would overindulge in “unhealthy” foods and overeat in general.
- There are right and wrong times to eat, particularly for sugary foods.
- Body weight changes are determined based on the simple model of “calories in, calories out” ie. intake vs exercise.
- Based on the above, fatness both CAN and SHOULD be “fixed” thru diet (restriction) and exercise (purging, but they are not ready to hear that).
- Based on the above, that if someone is not at a “healthy” weight, it is because they are lazy and/or lack self control around food (not them, of course, they have REASONS why they gained weight. Sure, it required their due effort and willpower to “fix” but it wasn’t their fault in the first place. Unlike other people. Gotta love that cognitive dissonance.)
When I was sick and having trouble eating, they were worried about me, and they wanted me to regain the weight I lost. But the ideas they instilled in me about what it means to eat healthily have been a barrier in my recovery, which they seem to see as complete just bc my weight is back into its previous range. And once my weight was back to normal, they felt perfectly okay expressing concerns about me gaining “too much” weight. Typing this I realize, if I had been about 20 pounds heavier before getting sick, they would probably have seen the weight loss as a silver lining.
For fuck’s sake, they started dieting while that was happing to me. I was struggling to force down any amount of food and watching them weigh and measure all their sad little portions, counting up the calories. I don’t think it ever occurred to them that might be upsetting for me. My mom keeps gleefully updating me on her weight loss as if I’m not the last person in the house who wants to talk about that.
All this from people who seem relatively reasonable around food. I’m vibrating with rage now.
Really in the mood for some (somewhat) soft headcanons, and this one’s been kickin around for a little:
Imagine a character who’s lost a little weight, whether it be because of godawful college eating habits, they’ve been stressed and unmotivated to eat, or just simply haven’t had access to a good meal for awhile.
Now imagine they meet up with a friend/loved one they haven’t seen in a bit and that person immediately hugs them, but upon doing so they notice right away how much smaller the hungry character feels in their arms. They’ve hugged this person so many times before, and they’re certain they shouldn’t be able to feel their spine.
The hugger lets go and immediately starts asking questions, “how have you been eating lately,” “when’s the last time you ate,” and as they do they continue to worriedly inspect their hungry loved one.
Much to their embarrassment, the hugger places a hand on the other’s tummy in the midst of their inspection, and as they do their stomach turns loose a terribly hungry growl. They finally admit they haven’t been eating as well as they would have liked, and the hugger wastes no time in beginning to put together a proper meal.
And obviously the hungry character is long overdue for some cuddles once they finish eating <3
