fatphobia robs the world of all joy and I think the faster people accept that the faster we can like. Improve and progress as a society. I’m saying this extremely seriously. We have got to get past this. Fucking sick of it. People lose their lives and years to this. Whole generations were ruined by these ideas and expectations.
people are being so fucking weird about this post I swear to fuck I’m literally talking about how being overly conscious about weight to the point of knowing no joy and being too self conscious and afraid to eat fucking cookies. Like shut the god damn hell up fatphobia needs to be discussed as something that destroys peoples’ ability to enjoy things with other people.
Eating and food are things that bring people together as a community and as friends. I’m talking about this explicitly — fatphobia is extremely bad and it was invented because someone somewhere wanted to sell you your own alienation so they could make more money on you being dissatisfied with something you have actually extremely little control over. Fatphobia is bad. Being discriminatory because of a natural body process is bad. That’s it. That’s the point of this post.
When you grow up fat surrounded by fatphobes it means you’re forced into feeling bad and confused about your body before your mind has developed enough to even make an opinion about it
But honestly, this entire conversation is despicable. Inhuman. Soulless. People are actually conducting research to determine whether fat people should be offered life-saving medical care. Our world hates fat people so much, that this question seems reasonable to ask.
After watching the Jon Oliver segment on how Dialisis Centers even try to convince their patients to not get kidney transplants to keep them as a permanent revenue source, I wonder how many fat patients they have that wouldn’t be patients if weight limits were removed
the dichotomy between the fat actors in the cats trailer being silly and buffoonish and the thin actors in the cats trailer being sexy and seductive is really upsetting, but less for the regular reasons and more because it implies we as the general audience are supposed to find any of these horrible facemelded cat homunculi fuckable
I’ve always felt really lucky with my doctor, but today really drove home just how much I lucked out with him, especially after some of the absolute horror stories I’ve seen.
I’m fat. Very fat, some would say. My doctor has never made me feel ashamed of that. He’s never dismissed symptoms I’ve had for my health issues by trying to get me to lose weight. And I’ve had plenty of doctors who do that.
Today I had a follow up for some blood work because I have an enlarged thyroid. My cholesterol is a bit elevated since my last test, but still in the ‘normal’ range. Not high enough to need medication, but still enough that we discussed some ways to lower it. He’s focused on diet because I’m physically disabled which rules out most exercise. He’s also ordering more tests to make sure that it isn’t being caused by a liver problem or anything like that.
Then he went on an angry rant about how fatphobic medicine is irresponsible and dangerous, and how a lot of patients who are overweight and have health issues are overweight because of the health problems, not the other way around. So patients like me with limited mobility, or people with pcos causing weight gain and that sort of thing.
I almost left the office crying because I’m so used to specialists being like ‘Oh yeah, your joints don’t work because you’re fat.’ as if I walk on my fingertips like a fucking horse, that even though he’s never been weight focused in my healthcare, I still wasn’t expecting him to be as supportive as he was.
We don’t talk enough about the systemic health effects of casual fatphobia and how much they fucking skew the data to the point where we literally cannot know how much outcomes are actually related to fatness and how much they are related to society not being designed for fat people, like literal design.
My best friend cannot find a bra.
She’s fat. We won’t get into the ~why~ here because it honestly wouldn’t matter whether it was “all her fault” or whether it was a result of outside forces like genes and such, she still deserves a goddamn fucking bra that fits.
And she cannot find a bra.
She’s short and fat, and Fat Bras are usually full cup, but because she’s short the full cups are usually too tall, or the armbands around them are too tall, to the point where what’ll fit around her chest and over her boobs will also dig up into her arms or have such high coverage that she literally cannot wear a shirt with a neckline high enough. Any bra that goes out enough goes too high.
This affects her ability to find clothing, impacting her ability to go outside sometimes, because she has this tiny selection of bras and she constantly has to wash them and when they’re gone she has no idea when she’ll next be able to find another unicorn bra. They appear in a flash usually in startups that die soon after, and COVID has killed most the small businesses remaining where she had even a hint of a chance of finding a fitting bra.
So she wears bras that don’t fit. Or she doesn’t leave the house. One gives her back pain. The other is, obviously, not very active. She likes to be active.
If she brings it up, people suggest breast reduction surgery.
But the thing is, with a good bra, she does not get back pain.
But if it’s that hard to find a good bra, they say, wouldn’t a reduction just be easier?
Wouldn’t it be easier for you to chop off part of your flesh, they say, then for us to cut fabric and underwire to more sizes? As if that is normal. As if that isn’t horrifying.
It’s not just bras. It’s chairs. It’s benches. It’s goddamn shoes. It’s seatbelts. It’s exercise equipment - I just got an exercise bike for Christmas. I had to shop around to find an affordable one that was also rated to take my level of fat. If I were 100 pounds heavier, which some people are? I don’t think any equipment would have existed in a price range that any working person could expect to afford. I don’t think most people even look at the weight ratings on chairs and couches and furniture. Once you start? They are lower than you think. There are absolutely 100% people you love in your life - whether really tall men or just average kinda overweight fat people - who should not be using the things they are using. Who are not getting support from their mattress, their footwear, their office chair. It might be you! You might be thinking “but I am average size!”, but the amount of furniture out there that’s only weighted to about 200lbs? Or 175??? It’s SO MUCH MORE THAN YOU REALIZE. Get into the Proper Fat? The 350lb, 400lb, 500lb fat? There’s virtually nothing.
Seatbelts are not tested for fat bodies and seatbelt extenders aren’t regulated.
We know about the problems with too small a blood pressure cuff. With too low a medicine dose. With no MRI a really fat body can fit in for a thousand miles.
We know, from multiple studies on multiple oppressed communities, that social bias by itself, with zero other compounding factors, can give people worse health outcomes.
Now add up
+ one of the social biases with the least pushback even from the educated liberal set with
+ having a world that is literally not made for you. Where you cannot get clothes, furniture, or transportation in a way that will actually accommodate you,
+ where society is constantly blaming you for this. And even if you somehow (and if you know how, please tell me) manage to retain some sense of self worth and optimism and determination despite all that
+ that’s not gonna magically give you access to the daily supplies a person needs in their home and out in public that’ll make living safe and healthy life literally physically possible.
If you’re really so concerned about fat people’s health start a bra company. If you’re really so concerned about fat people’s health mandate changes to seatbelt requirements. If you’re really so concerned about fat people’s health have a variety of chairs in your waiting room with at least some being properly Fat Rated. If you’re really so concerned about fat people’s health, make it easier for fat people to be active by making exercise equipment that fits them, swimwear that’ll actually stay on them, athletic shoes that can bear them. If you’re really so concerned about fat people’s health ask they be included in more medical trials. If you’re really so concerned about fat people’s health, promote fat visibility and fat people loving their bodies - because hating yourself has literally never been good for anyone’s health.
If you’re using “concern for health” as a shield to allow you to judge and criticize strangers, you don’t give a fuck about anyone’s health. You’re just an asshole who prefers a veneer of respectability when you bully people. You’re hateful and we can see right through you.
But fatphobia isn’t just bullying. It isn’t just judgment from strangers. It isn’t just medical neglect and medical bias. Even if we could wave a wand and make all that go away, my best friend still wouldn’t have a bra that fits, people still wouldn’t have a chair that supports them, a seatbelt that protects them. It’s literally engineered in. And it slowly kills people day by day by day.
Try self-love in lieu of Valentine’s Day hubbub, and to hell with complainers. Instead of buying yourself gifts (or, in addition to), let’s let some things go. For example, our societal mandate to be pleasing to the eye. This is a paraphrased quote from Erin McKean’s fabulous, entertaining, and long-lived blog, A Dress A Day. The relevant part reads: You don’t owe prettiness to anyone. Not to…
So, to help you stock your shelves with great fat positive books:
PRINCESSES VS DINOSAURS
One of my all-time fave picture books. Tremendous representation on all fronts & hilarious story.I do equity & bias reviews for kids books & mostly I get hired to read for race & gender issues. But there is one area of representation that I flag in almost every book I review.
We need more fat people in kids books.
CW: fatphobia & body shaming
(Disclaimer: I am thin & have thin privilege & am still v much learning how to break fatphobia both around me & internalized. One thing I’ve learned is to normalize & destigmatize the word ‘fat’. Hope I’ve done right in this thread but pls correct me if you find cause.)
Look at these pics. Entire communities, diverse in other ways, & not a single fat person to be found.
Do fat ppl go to parks? No.
But do they like to play with friends of all kinds? Also no.
Entire orchestras! But only think ppl can clarinet.
Yes we can build a scooter from a log & attach literal springs to our feet, but fat kids?! Can’t stretch the imagination that far.
MANY of these examples are from progressive books! I’m not talking about old ass Dick & Jane books. Such an ignored & overlooked area.
If you start looking you find that so many picture books exclude body diversity from their “diversity checklists” (barf)
This means that the only representation that kids who are fat see of themselves in books are the BAD ones. The problematic tropes that I won’t even give example of here because they bigtime suck.
Illustrators, pls stop doing this! Draw bodies of different sizes & shapes!!
And don’t stop there. Vitiligo, birthmarks, stretch marks, different hair, different eyes! Sameness is so lazy & also BOOOOOORING.
FRY BREAD
Big yes to stories about food & joy & not no [sic] fat shaming!
I REALLY WANT TO WIN
Another all-time fave & great teaching book. Good message, hilarious story. THIS GIRL & her belly & athletic prowess & dancing & kindness!!! Can’t get enough.
Someone online creating a quiz about literature analysis: What’s the one thing about a character that will never be related to the text/show’s theme? …Their appearance! Right!
Me who has been fat my entire life and seen how fatness is used and portrayed in media: I think you might want to check again.
You ever notice how the fat kid is always the bully in media when in real life it’s the complete opposite?
Being fat is literally the number one reason why children are bullied. More than any other category, which includes race, sexual orientation, disability, religion, and academic ability. Yet it’s always fat people who are demonized and portrayed as the bullies in media.
Me:*makes a post about the deadly oppression fat people face*
Every person who has ever been said something mean to by a fat person in the past twenty years:
I wanted to answer this ask, and thank you to @desasterdan for bringing up some examples as well! Here’s a picture I found when I searched for pictures of cartoon bullies online:
Literally four out of five of these are fat. All of them are “big” in some way. Then you have characters like Harold and “Big Patty” from Hey Arnold. “Big Patty” literally has the word “big” in her name.
You have one of the three bullies from The Proud Family
Pete from Mickey Mouse
There’s also characters from movies
JK Rowling literally ties evilness to fatness with Dudley, Vernon, the fat aunt who gets blown up, Crab, Goyle, Mrs. Umbridge, you name it.
Now you might be sitting to yourself and thinking “Okay, but that’s only like…sixteen people! I can think of skinny bullies from media too!” But you have to think to yourself:
Where is the other fat representation?
Because not only are fat people so often portrayed as bullies, villains, unlikeable, undesirable, ugly, etc., that is often the ONLY representation for fat people in any given piece of media. (And keep in mind that the list of characters I’ve given is really just bullies, not fat villains as a whole, which makes an even more enormous list).
Tell me where a nice, positive fat character exists in Hey Arnold. In The Fairly OddParents. In The Simpsons. In South Park. In Phineas and Ferb. In The Proud Family. In Megamind. In Mickey Mouse. In Harry Potter. Name five in each because there are certainly dozens upon dozens of skinny characters in all of these pieces of media, so coming up with five non-fatphobic/non-villains who are fat should be easy, right? Tell me where the fat representation is AT ALL in these shows besides the bullies.
I will tell you right now: It’s none for the vast majority of these shows. I guess Harry Potter have Hagrid and Ron’s mom? But like…that’s two characters out of a series that has at least fifty characters. And they don’t outnumber the fat villains/bullies at all. They certainly didn’t put any fat extras in any of the movie’s scenes. It’s skinny people all the way down unless you want a villain, bully, someone to mock, or someone known for being big so you have no choice but to make them fat.
So if every piece of media either has fat bullies or no fat people at all, what message are we sending here?
As an added bonus, here are some images I found when I searched for bullies on Google Images. Keep in mind that I did not write “fat” anywhere in the search bar. This is just what it gave me, one of these pictures even being titled “bully with a fat belly.”
your pal says something mean about a fat person in shorts this summer you SAY, “oh so they’re supposed to get heat stroke because of your sensitive ass?” (fat people deserve to wear weather appropriate clothing)
you’re getting ice cream with your friend and they make a comment about the fat person eating an ice cream cone you SAY, “oh then I guess you don’t want ice cream, let’s go.” (fat people don’t need to earn food even for enjoyment)
you’re at the beach and a fat person is laying out and your dad says something rude about it you SAY, “I think they look comfortable. It’s good they’re getting some sun. I bet they work hard all year for this vacation.” (fat people deserve to appear in public)
telling a someone you like their stretch marks does NOTHING for fatphobia and will NEVER make your friends and family think twice about their shitty learned hatred.
speaking of eating disorders, one thing that pisses me the fuck off is how general society decided at some point that anorexia is “more valid/serious” than bulimia.
it’s more visible. it has a higher mortality rate. but bulimia kills too; frequent vomiting throws off your body’s chemical communication systems, leading to aneurysms. it can seriously impair a person’s cognitive functioning, due to the fact that most people with bulimia starve in between binge episodes (something most people don’t realize)
but somewhere along the line, people decided that anorexia was more virtuous, and somehow more deserving of support. that bulimia was for people who “lack self control” or are “just looking for attention.” this has real material impacts: while it’s very hard to get state disability benefits for anorexia, bulimia is specifically excluded as a legal disability, despite the health, social, and cognitive impairment it can cause.
idk, just as someone who’s been in treatment for anorexia in the past who also has a loved one i care about deeply who struggles with bulimia, seeing the difference in how these disorders are discussed pisses me off. this shit kills.
It’s also a subconscious perception of even people working in mental health. When I was in hospital as a teen with anorexia the staff would dote on the anorexics while ignoring or getting openly irritated with the bulimics.
oh absolutely! people in mental health and related fields are definitely not immune to this! especially if you go in as a fat person saying you’re concerned you might have an eating disorder, you get mocked at best, and told that the healthiest thing for you is to continue starving at worst
“It is not just in the arena of negotiations over immigration that we can find eugenics operating– we need to remember that none of the current research in genetics, pharmacology, aging, wellness, even agriculture is “simply scientific,” and that all of these fields of research may simply be camouflaging their eugenic roots. […] It is this diversity and interdisciplinarity that Turda and others note, again and again, about eugenics all over the world– it is at once social and medical and legal and political, literary and visual, strident and gentle. Eugenics could leverage and utilize nearly every avenue of persuasion. Thus, eugenics also gathered all sorts of actors and spokespeople from every station of life.”
— Jay Timothy Dolmage, Disabled Upon Arrival: Eugenics, Immigration, and the Construction of Race and Disability
Fun and relevant reminder that the guy who invented the BMI (founded upon fatphobia, racism, antisemitism, and ableism) directly influenced the foundation of phrenology and eugenics as sciences*. We’ve never stopped practicing them, and we’ve never dealt with the underlying causes.
*it’s right there on his fucking wikipedia page, like it’s something to be proud of. Look up Adolphe Quetelet
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Plus-size Reader, Foggy Nelson x Reader
Features: Mutual pining, idiots in love, angst, body insecurity, misunderstandings.
Summary: When Bucky finally makes his move, you can’t believe that someone like him would ever really want you. A misunderstanding creates a rift in your friendship and, when a new suitor show up, will Bucky be willing to compete for your affections?
Updates and taglist: Updates for series will be made on weekly. Please follow my sideblog @tuiccimfanfiction for update notifications. All series and new stories will be reblogged to it. You will only receive notifications when a new part or story is out! Nothing else will be blogged to the page. I can’t thank you enough for your support!
Oh, so sorry. I must have forgotten to mention the SMUTTY epilogue that’s coming.
Y'all shitty anons can burn in hell. Keep your negative bullshit and fat shaming away from the rest of the world… There is a special place in hell for you.
People like this are EXACTLY the reason we need content like this.
Thank you for writing a supportive and stellar series, @tuiccim
“If I only had a common illness like diabetes I’d be able to access competent medical care without having to go doctor shopping.”
No, you wouldn’t.
The more time I spend talking shop with other diabetics the more I see doctors routinely screwing up our care and treatment. Everything from bullying us into weight loss to the point of developing eating disorders to withholding needed medication because they’re worried we’ll get fat if our bodies are able to process carbs into energy. People with symptomatic, urgently high blood sugars being given 500mg off metformin and sent home from the ER before they’re even stabilized.
It ain’t about disease rarity it’s about fatphobia, racism, classism, and sexism.
anyone know if like any surgeons anywhere have looked into phallo/meta techniques for fat people that don’t just involve yelling at them to lose weight and withholding surgery otherwise? not a thing i am going to look up on my own because i don’t want to get stuck in fatphobia hell
There’s a Facebook group call “fat trans/non-binary bottom surgery” or something like that you could check out OP.
I don’t have personal experience with this but I did ask the team at Scott Mosser’s Gender Confirmation Center in San Francisco about the BMI limit for their new bottom surgeon Dr. Ellie Ley & the team said around 40 & above that on a case by case basis.
I was asking on behalf of a friend for vaginoplasty. The reason this clinic specifically is because Scott Mosser openly does not have a BMI limit for top surgery. I was hoping that the same policy would apply for bottom surgery but the BMI limit for Dr Ley is higher than I have seen elsewhere
